


Karasuno Team Chat

by Pinktoria



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: #karasuno drama alert, (:, Body Rolls, Cereal, Chatlogs, Chatting & Messaging, HA HA HA HA HA HA HA SAID PINKTORIA, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, SHE WAS LAUGHING, Skeletor - Freeform, Skype chat, Tags Are Fun, Tsukki is peridot, also why are all my fics haikyuu, but its only for fun so ill probably write for it when i dont want to write anything else, by some chance, chatfic, chatroom, cries, dont ask how you just do, dont say anything, every time lev, hes done, hinata and kageyama are team rocket, hinata and noya fucked up, how about ｓｕｎｒｉｓｅ ｌａｎｄ, i hope that gives you all a good scare, idk why yama was scared of him dont ask me, im blue (da ba dee), im sorry dont go away, it's been fun, just sayin, kageyama is gr8, kageyama x karkat new otp, karasuno meme team., karasuno meme team?, kenma is literally pudding, kuroo tries to leave hell but he cant, leave daichi alone, lev is late??? lev y this, make kags gr8 again, maybe in case theres a CEREAL MURDER, maybe karasuno meme team can be our always, none of you are gonna read these tags because i dont update them but id you do, noya wants the d and asahi is going to cry, oikawas here too, or in their words, rip kuroo, rip tsukki, save him, singing kags is gr8er, skype tbh, so thats the bullshit fandom chapter out of the way, someone from ao3 had me remove some tags [cries for a year], star wars muffin!!! MMMMMM, tanaka and noya are GIGANTIC MEMELORDS FUCK, team freak duo, this is my first thing that i plan to update a lot, this is your typical chat fic, tsukki is done with the karasuno meme team, who doesnt love the "kags is an amazing singer" rumor headcanon thing yayyyyyyyyyyy, why the hell does ao3 have a cereal tag, you know its a good fic if youve got "body rolls" there, ＳＯＭＥＯＮＥ ＷＨＯ ＭＥＭＥＳ ＹＯＵ ＨＡＲＤ
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-18
Updated: 2018-03-05
Packaged: 2018-08-09 14:46:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 43
Words: 47,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7806028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pinktoria/pseuds/Pinktoria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Also known as Karasuno Team Memes, The Incident™, so on and so forth...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just to be clear:
> 
> literalsunshine: Hinata  
> kingofthecourt: Kageyama (Hinata chose his name for him)  
> yourultimatesenpai: Tanaka  
> ROLLINGTHUNDER: Noya ofc  
> wakemeupinside: Asahi (everyone thinks he likes that song but it was meant to be a joke)  
> TuskishimeKei: If you cant guess who I think you need to see a doctor.  
> gucci: Yamaguchi  
> dadchi: Daichi  
> sugamomma: Sugawara

**literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt, sugamomma, dadchi, TsukishimaKei, gucci, ROLLINGTHUNDER, wakemeupinside,** and **yourultimatesenpai** to the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** has renamed this conversation to **"Karasuno Team Chat"**.

literalsunshine: BAKAGEYAMA TOSS TO ME  
kingofthecourt: i  
kingofthecourt: there are so many things wrong with that i dont know what to say  
literalsunshine: so you're not gonna toss to me?  
kingofthecourt: ugh  
kingofthecourt: ill be there in 10 minutes dumbass  
TsukishimaKei: w h y  
gucci: why what  
TsukishimaKei: idk just why everything basically  
TsukishimaKei: for example  
TsukishimaKei: why was i added  
literalsunshine: Because™  
dadchi: Thats the first time ive ever seen hinata capitalize anything  
literalsunshine: i probably could do it all the time if i wanted but,,,, nah  
sugamomma: rip  
yourultimatesenpai: hOplaSDGI fickidbf  
wakemeupinside: ?  
yourulitamesenpai: hAHAHAHA  
literalsunshine: wtf the fuck  
sugamomma: hinata, language  
literalsunshine: hECK  
yourultimatesenpai: HI ITS NOYA  
yourultimatesenpai: I STOLE TANAKAS PHONE AND HES CHASING ME  
yourultimatesenpai: PLEASE BE PROUD IT WAS VERY DANGEDKDOAIFIJRIGIWJDJNA  
wakemeupinside: noya omg  
wakemeupinside: dont get killed  
yourultimatesenpai: i hate noya  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you love me  
yourultimatesenpai: wtf did you change my picture to?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: its Wilson from cast away  
yourultimatesenpai: but............. why  
wakemeupinside: jfc noya

literalsunshine: ok wait everyone shut up for a sec  
gucchi: none of us were saying anything  
literalsunshine: i found our match with dateko on the internet  
dadchi: Ew,  
literalsunshine: SH  
literalsunshine: ok and their fricking chant is so catchy  
literalsunshine: i might just go to dateko bc of their chant  
literalsunshine: GO GO LETS GO LETS GO DATEKO  
dadchi: EW,,  
wakemeupimside: i can verify that indeed EW,, is an appropriate response  
literalsunshine: GO GO LETS GO LETS GO DATEKO  
sugamomma: hinata you're grounded  
hinata: UGH  
dadchi: Hinata listen to your mother  
literalsunshine: ok

literalsunshine: ok where tf is kageyama he said hed be here like An Hour Ago™  
kingofthecourt: oh shit  
literalsunshine: gdi  
literalsunshine: meet swageyama, Professional Procrastinator  
literalsunshine: he was chillin out  
literalsunshine: maxin, relaxin all cool  
TOLLINGTHUNDER: hinata boutta meme  
TsukishimaKei: i already know where this is going and i hate it  
kingofthecourt: what  
literalsunshine: and all playin some v-ball outside of school  
literalsunshine: when a guy from shiratorizawa who was up to no good  
literalsunshine: started makin trouble in his neighborhood  
dadchi: SPITS OUT DRINk  
literalsunshine: he got in one little fight and suga got scared  
literalsunshine: he said  
sugamomma: youremoving with your auntie and your uncle in nekoma  
kingofthecourt: I,,, WHAT JUST,,,,, , ,, HAPPE, NE,,,D,,  
ROLLIGTHUNDER: http://niceme.me/  
literalsunshine: [tips fedora]

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** has renamed this conversation to **"KARASUNO TEAM MEMES"**.

 

kingofthecourt: thats it  
sugamomma: what's it  
dadchi: Thats what  
literalsunshine: whats what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: thats that  
yourultimatesenpai: its it  
kingofthecourt: I CANT SAY QNYTHING WITHOUT YOU ALL MAKING FUN OF ME  
TsukishimaKei: *anything  
kingofthecourt: i hate you

gucchi: did i ever tell you guys about the incident  
literalsunshine: no but tell us  
gucchi: ok  
TsukishimaKei: YAMAGUCHI DO NOT  
gucci: gasp, what was that tsukki,,,,  
TsukishimaKei: YAMAGUCHI IF YOU TELL THEM I WILL STAB YOI  
gucchi: with what  
TsukishimaKei: DOESNT MATTER, WHATEVERS NEARBY  
gucci: what if i do it in another group chat and you dont know  
TsukishimaKei: YAMAGUCHI DO NOT

( **gucci** added **literalsunshine, kingofthecourt, sugarmomma, dadchi, ROLLINGTHUNDER, wakemeupinside,** and **yourultimatesenpai** to the conversation.

 **gucci** renamed the conversation **"the incident"**.

literalsunshine: omg yamaguchi  
literalsunshine: hes gonna stab you  
gucci: worth it  
dadchi: What was the incident  
literalsunshine: *The Incident™  
dadchi: What was The Incident™  
gucci: ok so one time tsukishima was walking home from school w/ me  
literalsunshine: ok  
gucci: and you know that piece of my hair that sticks up??  
literalsunshine: ye  
gucci: its an ahoge)

TsukishimaKei: the group chat just got really quiet  
TsukishimaKei: YAMAGUCHI I S2G

(gucci: and while we were walking home tsukki was staring at my hair and i was like "is my hair messed up or somethingn??"  
literalsunshine: ok  
gucci: tsukki doesnt answer  
gucci: HE JUST STRAIGHT UP PULLS ON MY AHOGE  
sugamomma: HOLY FUCKING SHIT  
dadchi: Damnnnnnnn boi get u some action (; (;  
kingofthecourt: captain please never use a winky face again  
dadchi: Ok sorry  
gucci: nooo stop shh  
gucci: and he noticed i was blushing and stuff and he realizes what he did  
gucci: looking back on it, it was really funny  
literalsunshine: lmao  
literalsunshine: was he bein all awkward??  
gucci: if you saw his face you wouldve died  
literalsunshine: HFS WAS HE BLUSHING  
gucci: YEAH LMAO  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: HOLY SHIT  
yourultimatesenpai: he's totally gonna stab you  
gucci: like i said, worth it)

TsukishimaKei: YAMAGUCHI IM GOING TO KILL YOU  
gucci: but i didnt tell them  
TsukishimaKei: YAMAGUCHI I KNOW YOU DID  
TsukishimaKei: CHAT DIED FOR LIKE A YEAR THAT MEANS YOU WERE IN A DIFFERENT CHAT  
literalsunshine: i can 100% guarantee he did not tell us  
TsukishimaKei: LIKE ID BELIEVE YOU YOU LITTLE BRAT  
gucci: ok fine  
gucci: i told them  
TsukishimaKei: IM GOING TO STAB YOU THE NEXT TIME I SEE YOU

gucci: GUYS OMG  
literalsunshine: what  
gucci: THE NEXT TIME I SAW HIM WAS AT SCHOOL AND HE STABBED ME IN HE HAND WITH A PENCIL  
gucci: OUR TEACHER GAVE ME A BANDAID AND SHE DIDNT EVEN SCOLD TSUKKI  
TsukishimaKei: i think it was a pretty just revenge  
literalsunshine: lmao tsukishima  
literalsunshine: i cant believe you pulled his ahoge

 **TsukishimaKei** left the group.

 **literalsunshine** added **TsukishimaKei** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes from the karasuno team memes  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: SPEAKING of team memes  
dadchi: No  
yourultimatesenpai: but you didnt let us say it yet  
dadchi: Fine do your spiel  
dadchi: The answer is still no  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: (ahem)  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: SPEAKING of team memes  
yourultimatesenpai: DO YOU LIKE MEMES  
ROLLIGTHUNDER: DO YOU LIKE TEAMS  
yourultimatesenpai: WELL BOY HOWDY DO WE HAVE AN OFFER FOR YOU  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what do YOU say to changing the teams name to  
yourultimatesenpai: TEAM MEME  
dadchi: No  
ultimatesenpai: ok it was worth a try  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: daichi you know what  
dadchi: What  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you need someone  
dadchi: I have someone  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ok but  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ＳＯＭＥＯＮＥ ＷＨＯ ＭＥＭＥＳ ＹＯＵ ＨＡＲＤ  
dadchi: Never speak to me or my 6 sons ever again

wakemeupinside: holy shit i missed a lot of stuff


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> team bonding (,;

literalsunshine: KAGYAMWE YEOYNMAY SI SSKDSKSFDKGS,DG,RDF  
literalsunshine: AWEJKGTSRDJKWSEDLA,DKSTOMARRO,G LR HLK FDK GSDL N O, NO KAGEYA AMAA,,A KFKLDS  
dadchi: Hinata do you have a keyboard issue  
literalsunshine: JWKESJSKTAWLE4RTAWREWE KA HES REALYLY Y,Y,YAER ERGMEDS  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what the hell  
yourultimatesenpai: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
dadchi: Tanaka please provide insight  
yourultimatesenpai: ok so you know how you made me stay and watch them??  
dadchi: Yeah?  
yourultimatesenpai: apparently hinata saw kageyama doing something (idfk what) and kageyamas chasing him around the gym and takin his phone and shit  
literalsunshine: IM HIDING IN THE BATHROOM  
yourultimatesenpai: great ill tell him  
literalsunshine: NONONONONO I REALLY GOTTA TELL YOU GUSY HOW HEWHWJFIGLAERDKGREGFSDED GFKWRE,T WARG.W,L;T3QWEO53  
sugamomma: wtf  
dadchi: Suga  
sugamomma: wth  
dadchi: How is that better??  
sugamomma: what the heck  
literalsunshine: TANnakAsdfnasdkf AI HATE EYOU DGFRJ GTLKJWLJ EKW TGAJWLKREGDLIJ  
yourultimatesenpai: but im still your senpai right  
iteralsunshine: kwjeKJRIEJFDTAKREJGDTKLSJREG0 PWTP04KFK34 M3 EFK  
yourultimatesenpai: AHAHAHAHA HE YELLED YEAH ACROSS THE GYM  
yourultimatesenpai: OH SHIT  
yourultimatesenpai: ok brb, i gotta see if hes okay  
dadchi: What happened??????????  
kingofthecourt: i caught him

dadchi: Um??? Where did you guys go is everything ok?  
yourultimatesenpai: this is gr8 im crying  
dadchi: ????????????????????  
yourultimatesenpai: kageyama can rea;la setjwe awlksd wgejoritju woivbrtnjg r sjfd zwegjkssdjatl;jwetlkjJ JRKELJG AWVUOPTIUpoireygio jxreiagjxoiaoerjdgbopja  
dadchi: KAGEYAMA I SWEAR TO VOLLEYBALL JESUS IF YOU HURT HIM TOO YOURE OFF THE TEAM  
literalsunshine: OK  
literalsunshine: SO WHILE KAGS CHASES TANAKA ACROSS THE GYM ILL TELL YOU  
literalsunshine: SO HE PUNCHED ME  
literalsunshine: ITS NOT TOO BAD BUT I DONT REALLY CARE  
literalsunshine: ITS JUST WORTH IT IF I CAKEDJFA JKEWTwjlfek ewaklrj vjesoif jJ WAEIOJ OA;JAEJKRSDGFT OJAAJEKRG JD NO KAGREYAMA ISTS AWE KJAEWI TFJALKWE JFEMY PHOENE TWAEM TKJEF ERJOIGJFDIJG EFUCIK  
yourultimatesenpai: i dont think we should press kageyama on this anymore.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: bro, are u ok bro  
yourultimatesenpai: yeah bro  
yourultimatesenpai: im ok bro  
yourultimatesenpai: but i think kageyama has a 6th sense about this  
kingofthecourt: no one can know  
literalsunshine: but its good!! you should have tswijkKLEG DJIJRGSDKGD  
yourultimatesenpai: since you guys cant see whats happening, ill give you a play by play  
yourultimatesenpai: kageyama is yelling at hinata for tryng to tell you  
yourultimatesenpai: and now hes yelling because hinata shouldnt be in the group chat to talk to him because theyre right in front of each other  
kingofthecourt: NO ONE  
kingofthecourt: CAN  
kingofthecourt: KNOW  
literalsunshine: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
literalsunshine: im gonna find a way to tell them  
literalsunshine: tanaka avenge me when im dead  
yourultimatesenpai: ok lmao  
kingofthecourt: If you tell them, I will find a way to personally make your life a living hell before killing both you and Tanaka.  
literalsunshine: BWAH  
literalsunshine: HES MAKING A REALLY SCARY FACE  
yourultimatesenpai: I CAN VERIFY  
wakemeupinside: im not there but i can verify too

literalsunshine: kageyamas not on right???  
kingofthecourt: wrong

literalsunshine: can we play charades  
dadchi: I dont think you can play charades over skype  
literalsunshine: videochat  
dadchi: Hinata put your phone away and get back to class  
literalsunshine: ok,

( **literalsunshine** added **yourultimatesenpai** and **ROLLINGTHUNDER** to the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** has renamed the conversation to **"kags' big secrejskfasreyget reifo3jcoi4ejrcflecrect55t"**.

 **literalsunshine** left the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: ??????????????????????????????????????????????????  
yourultimatesenpai: oh man  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: whats going on

 **yourultimatesenpai** left the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????)

 

dadchi: Where did everyone go  
kingofthecourt: You shouldn't worry. I'm taking care of it.  
dadchi: KAGEYAMA I WILL CUT YOU FROM THE TEAM  
kingofthecourt: Doesn't matter. No one can know.  
literalsunshine: i am legit scared for my life  
literalsunshine: 100% legit scared  
yourultimatesenpai: same  
yourultimatesenpai: kageyama is dangerous  
kingofthecourt: NO ONE CAN KNOW.

dadchi: Did kageyama finally murder you  
literalsunshine: he made us promise not to say anything  
yourultimatesenpai: well probably say something eventually tho lmao  
kingofthecourt: No, you won't.  
yourultimatesenpai: OKAY IM SORRY WE WEONT  
sugamomma: ok guys, team meeting.  
wakemeupinside: over skype?  
sugamomma: YES, over skype

 **sugamomma** has renamed the conversation to **"Team Meeting"**.

sugamomma: kageyama, you need to get over your secret  
dadchi: Yes. Im sure whatever it is we dont really care  
sugamomma: daichi thats mean  
dadchi: The truth is mean  
sugamomma: i think this is starting to effect hinatas playing.  
literalsunshine: no its not  
literalsunshine: im fine  
literalsunshine: no its not  
sugamomma: hes afraid you wont toss to him  
sugamomma: or, well, that youll hurt him with the ball in some way  
kingofthecourt: He's fine. He said it himself.  
sugamomma: hes not though  
literalsunshine: am too  
kingofthecourt: See?  
kingofthecourt: Look, no one can know. Not even my parents.  
literalsunshine: kAGEYAMA, NOT EVEN YOUR PARENTS KNOW?????????????????  
kingofthecourt: OF COURSE NOT DUMBASS  
kingofthecourt: NO ONE CAN KNOW  
literalsunshine: KAGEYAMAAAAAA

wakemeupinside: they logged off???  
dadchi: ?  
sugamomma: whats happening  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: OH MY GOD THEYRE GONNA KILL EACH OTHER  
yourultimatesenpai: IS HE GONNA KILL ME TOO???? OH GOD  
dadchi: Whered they go?  
sugamomma: hang on

 

 **literalsunshine** has renamed the conversation to **"KAGS BIG BIG SECRET"**.

 **literalsunshine** sent a file: **kags BIG BIG secret.mp3**

daichi: Oh  
daichi: OH  
daichi: OH MY GOD  
sugamomma: hhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOLY SHIT  
kingofthecourt: hinata i hate you so much  
literalsunshine: THEY MUST KNOW  
yourultimatesenpai: what is that file  
yourultimatesenpai: i dont click things just in case SOMEBODY is trying to rickroll me  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ill get you one day  
literalsunshine: i secretly recorded kags singing so the rest of the team could know  
yourultimatesenpai: howd you do it?  
literalsunshine: we had to clean the gym again yesterday so i stuck it in my pocket and remembered to stay close enough that itd pick it up  
kingofthecourt: youre a sneaky dumbass and i hate you so much  
TsukishimaKei: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
TsukishimaKei: THE KING,, , ,,,,,,,, , ,,,,,, ,,, , SINGING,,,,,,, ,, WHEEZES,

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes kags big big secret  
kingofthecourt: i really, really hate you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you could call it bonding hahaha


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sorry 4 short chapter ):
> 
> also why do yall like this piece of shit

**ROLLINGTHUNDER** renamed the conversation to **"MEMEOFF"**.

**526 unread messages.**

ROLLINGTHUNDER: if you love me let me GOOOOOOOOOOoooOoooOOoOOOOooOooOooOoOooOooOoOoOOoOoOoOoooo  
yourultimatesenpai: its too late to apologiiIiiIiIIiiIiiiiiihzeeee  
dadchi: Its 2 am wtf are you two doing up  
yourultimatesenpai: YOOOOOO ITS DAT CAPTRAIN  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: O SHIT WADDUP  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: LMAO "CAPTRAIN"  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: "CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA PRACTICE MATCH" //CLAPS  
dadchi: Go to sleep or ill kill both of you  
yourultimatesenpai: [People die if they are killed.png](http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/001/593/peopledie.jpg)  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: [meme.jpg](http://i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/008/848/279.jpg)  
dadchi: I hate both of you  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: [rihanna.gif](https://m.popkey.co/3f7fb2/wGY0N.gif)  
dadchi: Go to sleep or ill never let either of you near Kiyoko-san again  
yourultimatesenpai: YES SIR CAPTAIN SIR  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: SORRY CAPTAIN  
dadchi: 526 damn messages

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do u like my expert memes


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i hate you all
> 
> like at least read one of my actually good fanfics

kingofthecourt: of course i put the milk in before the cereal  
literalsunshine: kageyama we cant be friends anymore  
kingofthecourt: wait what  
sugamomma: DAICHI OUR CHILD IS GOING THROUGH A REBELLIOUS PHASE WHAT DO WE DO  
dadchi: The same thing we always do in this chat, suga  
dadchi: Disown our children  
sugamomma: (pinky and the brain, brain, brain, brain)  
sugamomma: kageyama we officially disown you  
kingofthecourt: whAT WHY  
kingofthecourt: I DONT UNDERSTAND WHATS GOING ON  
yourultimatesenpai: (help)  
ROLLINGTUNDER: kageyama needs somebody  
yourultimatesenpai: (help)  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: not just anybody  
yourultimatesenpai: (help)  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: he neEDS SOMEONE  
yourultimatesenpai: (HELLLPP)  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yeah but no we cant talk to you anymore kags  
kingofthecourt: thats it im LEAVING  
literalsunshine: FINE  
kingofthecourt: FINE  
literalsunshine: IM GLAD  
kingofthecourt: ME TOO  
kingofthecourt: i

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

wakemeupinside: wait are you guys having an actual fight over this  
literalsunshine: HOW CAN YOU FORGIVE THAT ASAHI  
literalsunshine: HE PUTS THE MILK IN BEFORE THE CEREAL  
literalsunshine: HOW CAN YOU FORGIVE THAT  
wakemeupinside: //fucking dies  
wakemeupimside: dont capslock me its not my fault  
literalsunshine: WELL I NEED SOMEONE TO CAPSLOCK AND KAGEYAMA NOT HERE  
wakemeupinside: arent you gonna add him and say "no one escapes from memeoff"  
literalsunshine: THE URGE TO DO SO IT GREAT BUT IM MAD AT HIM  
dadchi: Wait

 **dadchi** addad **yachi** to the conversation.

dadchi: There yaichi can act as kageyama for you  
yachi: what  
literalsunshine: ITS NOT THE SAME THIS TIME DAICHI IM LIKE LEGITLY MAD ABOUT THIS  
yachi: wait lemme scroll up

yachi: hinaa ehat te fukcign  
literalsunshine: HE DOESNT DESERVE TO BE ON THIS TEAM ANYMORE  
yachi: theres nothing wrong with pouring the milk first  
literalsunshine: WHY IS THAT HOW YOU DO IT TOO  
yachi: ofc not but well tbh its not something to get worked up over haha  
literalsunshine: yachi get out  
yachi: what  
yachi: wHAT  
yachi: TF YOU JUST SAY TO ME??  
yachi: FUCK OFF HINATA

 **yachi** left the conversation.

yourultimatesenpai: well then

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another short chapter but ou know how it goes
> 
> actually its hust short because i got lazy and its 3 am (the tine i always write these things)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> im starting to worry because people actually like this fanfic

ROLLINGTHUNDER: guys wanna see asahis fursona  
wakemeupinside: noya stop i dont have a goddamn fursona  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: :0 asahi swear  
sugamomma: but hes allowed to  
literalsunshine: wait so hes allowed to but not us  
sugamomma: mhm  
literalsunshine: but,,,,,,,, y  
sugamomma: all the 3rd years have automatic vip passes to swearing  
yourultimatesenpai: im a 3rd year let me swear  
dadchi: Tanaka no  
kingofthecourt: why does it matter we all swear anyway  
literalsunshine: its the principal of the matter dumbass  
yachi: hINATA HOLY SHIT  
kingofthecourt: hinata fuck off  
literalsunshine: ok sorry  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: this is getting off topic

ROLLINGTHUNDER renamed the conversation to "asahis fursona".

wakemeupinside: quit telling people i have a fursona people are gonna start believing it  
yourultimatesenpai: ok but who cares if you have a fursona or not  
wakemeupinside: thats not the problem. the problem is that if someone wants to see it i have nothing to show them??? because i dont have a fursona  
literalsunshine: do you want to borrow my werewolf oc  
wakemeupinside: if its ok with you  
literalsunshine: ye lmao its cool  
sugamomma: wait u have a werewolf oc???  
literalsunshine: ye???  
sugamomma: can i ship him with my vampire oc  
literalsunshine: YES!!  
kingofthecourt: um  
kingofthecourt: uh  
kingofthecourt: whats a fursona  
kingofthecourt: what does oc mean  
literalsunshine: [kicks kageyama into oblivion] bye  
kingofthecourt: [flies into oblivion?] why  
yourultimatesenpai: kageyama you  
yourultimatesenpai: just dont even try  
kingofthecourt: ok

literalsunshine: this just in, kageyama is a homestuck  
kingofthecourt: i relate to karkat  
literalsunshine: wtf kags i was just jokin whyd you have to go and prove me right  
kingofthecourt: lmao

yourultimatesenpai: waiT HOW IS KAGEYAMA A HOMESTUCK AND STILL ABLE TO NOT KNOW WHAT OC OR FURSONA  
dadchi: Tanaka its been an hour and a half and you are just realizing this now  
yourultimatesenpai: YEAH OK HAHAHA TANAKAS DUMB BUT LIKE??? DONT YOU FIND THAT THE LEAST BIT STRANGE  
dadchi: Well it being kageyama, not really  
kingofthecourt: whats that supposed to mean

literalsunshine: tfw chat dies

literalsunshine: guys where tf are you

literalsunshine: do we have practice today

literalsunshine: waiT OH SHIT

kingofthecourt: i cant believe you forgot we had practice  
kingofthecourt: and came late  
literalsunshine: dont be mean now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for another bullshit chapter lmao  
> but let me reiterate my tags: im only writing this 4 fun  
> we here at pinktoria inc like to have fun. we dont take ourselves to seriously.  
> and by we i mean me and my beta reader (who doesnt even beta read this piece of crap wtf)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> warning  
> this chapter has excessive mentions of asahi's d  
> asahi probably dies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aka: FUCK OFF STOP READING THIS ITS TERRIBLE IM CRYING

yourultimatesenpai: GUYS NOYA WANTS THE D  
yourultimatesenpai: HES THIRSTING 4 IT MY DUDES  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: fuck off tanaka im going to kill you  
wakemeupinside: wtf  
dadchi: WHY DO YOU FUCKS ALWAYS TALK ABOUT WEIRD SHIT AT 3 IN THE MORNING???? SMH WE HAVE SCHOOL TOMORROW CANT YOU AT LEAST TALK ABOUT WEIRD SHIT AT SOME OTHER TIME?????  
dadchi: LIKE????? MAYBE NOT AT 3 FUCKING AM?????  
dadchi: I HATE YOU  
sugamomma: he doesnt mean that hes just tired  
yourultimatesenpai: ok but  
yourultimatesenpai: none of thIS CHANGES THE FACT THAT NOYA IS THIRSTING FOR THE D

 **yourultimatesenpai** renamed the conversation to **"NOYA'S THIRST"**.

literalsunshine: the d of who  
yourultimatesenpai: asahi, probably

 **wakemeupinside** left the conversation.

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** left the conversation.

dadchi: FUCK OFF  
dadchi: ALL OF YOU

 **literalsunshine** added **wakemeupinside** and **ROLLINGTHUNDER** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes from noyas thirst  
yourultimatesenpai: i think theyre dead  
yourultimatesenpai: probably  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: IM NOT THIRSTING FOR ASAHIS DICK OK  
yourultimatesenpai: ok....................................................... that sounds fake but ok

 **wakemeupinside** left the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: LOOK YOU KILLED HIM  
dadchi: ALL OF YOU GO TO SLEEP OR IM CANCELLING ALL VOLLEYBALL PRACTICE FOR THIS WEEK  
literalsunshine: i know for a fact you cant do that  
dadchi: AYWOEITJRDVTIREMGJTVSLKTE JGSEW  
sugamomma: daichi just turn your phone off  
dadchi: I fucking cant it doesnt turn off when its plugged in for some bullshit reason  
sugamomma: poor daichi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why do you even like this fuckiking meme


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> noya stop

ROLLINGTHUNDER: here comes a thought  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: that might alarm you  
yourultimatesenpai: what someoNE SAID  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AND HOW IT HARMED YOU  
yourultimatesenpai: SOMETHING YOU DID THAT FAILED TO BE CHARMING  
yourultimatesenpai: THINGS THAT YOU SAID ARE  
ROLLINGTHUDER: SUDDENLY SWARMING  
ROLLINGHUNDER: YOOOOOOOOOO  
yourultimatesenpai: AYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY  
dadchi: What  
literalsunshine: this is noyanaka  
literalsunshine: back together  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wait so if hinata is the garnet to our ruby and sapphire whos ruby and whos sapphire  
sugamomma: i think tanaka is ruby and noya is sapphire  
yourultimatesenpai: ye i can get behind that ROLLINGTHUNDER: future vision  
literalsunshine: NONONO WAIT IM NO GARNET!!  
literalsunshine: IF ANYTHING, ID SAY TSUKISHIMA IS GARNET  
yourultimatesenpai: what no  
ROLLINGTHUNER: if fusing with tanaka makes us tsukishima im outie

 **dadchi** renamed the conversation to **"Gemsone based conversations".**

TsukishimaKei: isnt that a little mean  
yourultimatesenpai: arent you a little mean  
TsukishimaKei: touche  
TsukishimaKei: also, dont volunteer me to be their garnet shrimpy  
TsukishimaKei: if anything id prefer peridot  
dadchi: What  
literalsunshine: thats fine and dandy but then whos garnet??  
sugamomma: kageyama??  
kingofthecourt: cant be  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: y tho  
kingofthecourt: BECAUSE I CANT OKAY  
yourultimatesenpai: flashbacks to that time kageyama almost killed us  
sugamomma: that was like three days ago  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: flashbacks  
sugamomma: then if kageyama wont be garnet, i proclaim daichi garnet and myself pearl  
dadchi: Why are wo talking about gemstones i do not understand  
sugamomma: and i rhink kageyama is connie  
sugamomma: and hinata steven  
literalsunshine: thats kinda specific  
literalsunshine: whyd you pair us up like that? is it because were the freak quick duo

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapses Gemstone based conversations


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> im blue da ba dee da ba daa

ROLLINGTHUNDER: daiiiichiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii (:  
ROLLINGTHINDER: guess what time it is (:  
dadchi: Its 1 am  
yourultimatesenpai: yes (:  
yourultimatesenpai: do you know what that means (:  
dadchi: No?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: IT MEANS (:

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** has renamed the conversation to **"IM BLUE (DA BA DEE) (:".**

yourultimatesenpai: YO LISTEN UP THIS IS A STORY  
yourultimatesenpai: ABOUT A LITTLE GUY WHO LIVES IN A BLUE WORLD  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AND ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT AND EVERYTHING HE SEES  
yourultimatesenpai: IS JUST BLUE  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: LIKE HIM  
dadchi: Jfc do you guys coordinate these things or something  
yourultimatesenpai: INSIDE AND OUT  
yourultimatesenpai: BLUE HIS HOUSE WITH A BLUE LITTLE WINDOW  
dadchi: And if so, how  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AND A BLUE CORVETTE  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AND EVERYTHING IS BLUE FOR HIM  
yourultimatesenpai: AND HIMSELF AND EVERYBODY AROUND  
dadchi: Do you mean [this house.jpg](https://s3.amazonaws.com/rapgenius/filepicker%2FXUlnQ2h4SXuhjnr4e5nR_bluehouse.jpg)  
yourultimatesenpai: CAUSE HE AINT GOT NOBODY TO LISTEN  
literalsunshine: iM BLUE DA BA DEE DA BA DAA  
literalsunshine: IM BLUE DA BE DEE DA BA DAA  
dadchi: Oh come on you even got hinata in on it  
dadchi: You are corrupting the first years  
TsukishimaKei: the first years are corrupting themselves  
literalsunshine: not true  
wakemeupinside: i like that song  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: holy shit thats adorable asahi  
yourultimatesenpai: what did i tell you, he thirsts for asahis dick  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wtf tanaka ): ): why did you have to say that thats,,, ): ): no ):  
wakemeupinside: i  
wakemeupinside: uh  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: tanaka,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ): ): ):  
yourultimatesenpai: ): ): ): ): ):

 **literalsunshine** added **yachi** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: scroll up  
yachi: aight

yachi: ,,,o mg you were right  
literalsunshine: i told you  
literalsunshine: pay up  
yourultimatesenpai: wait what  
literalsunshine: (;  
yachi: (;  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: why is yachi paying up  
yachi: (;  
literalsunshine: (;  
wakemeupinside: wtf?? wtf  
dadchi: Its now 2 in the morning and guess what im doing  
sugamomma: what  
dadchi: LISTENING TO MY PHONE MAKE GODDAMN SKYPE NOISES ALL NIGHT!!!!! WHAT ELSE DO I EVER DO  
dadchi: ALL BECAUSE THESE FUCKS CANT GO TO SLEEP WHAT THE FUCK  
dadchi: I HATE THIS CANT YOU LET ME GET A GOOD NIGHTS SLEEP  
dadchi: FUCK YOU ALL

 **dadchi** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **dadchi** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes IM BLUE (DA BA DEE) (:  
dadchi: Fuck off hinata i literally hate you go the fuck to sleep or youre not allowed to play volleyball at practice tomorrow  
sugamomma: daichi  
dadchi: And kageyamas not allowed to toss to you after practice  
sugamomma: daichi  
dadchi: And  
sugamomma: DAICHI SHUT UP AND GO TO SLEEP PUT YOUR PHONE IN THE OTHER GODDAMN ROOM  
dadchi: OKAY  
sugamomma: YOURE SLEEPING ON THE COUCH TONIGHT  
dadchi: FINE  
sugamomma: FINE  
dadchi: OKAY  
sugamomma: I LOOK FORWARD TO IT  
dadchi: ME TOO  
literalsunshine: wait but ive been to both your houses you dont even live together  
sugamomma: DONT YOU KNOW WHAT A FUCKING METAPHOR IS HINATA  
literalsunshine: OKAY IM SORRY  
kingofthecourt: ALL OF YOU GO TO FUCKING SLEEP  
literalsunshine: aaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **literalsunshine** left the conversation.

 **kingofthecourt** added **literalsunshine** to the conversation.

kingofthecourt: NOBODY ESCAPES IM BLUE (DA BA DEE) (:  
literalsunshine: EVEN WHEN KAGEYAMA USES (: HIS SMILE IS STILL SCARY  
kingofthecourt: GO TO SLEEP HINATA (:  
kingofthecourt: OR IM GOING TO COME OVER TO YOUR HOUSE (:  
kingofthecourt: AND KILL YOU (:  
literalsunshine: OKAY

literalsunshine: but yachi youre still paying me tomorrow right  
yachi: yeah yeah  
kingofthecourt: GO  
kingofthecourt: TO  
kingofthecourt: SLEEP  
kingofthecourt: ITS 3 AM

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rip hinata ),; you will forever live on in our hearts ),;


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> wow????? two (three?) chapters in one day?????????????? wow??????????????????????????????? special chapter just because i was reading kuroken fics and i needed these two in my life ok
> 
> kuroo: imalwaysthisnice  
> kenma: puddinghead (kuroo chose it because kenma didnt really want a skype in the first place)  
> lev: russianblue

(puddinghead: kuroo i need help pls  
imalwaysthisnice: What is it kitten?  
puddinghead: ok 1. dont call me that and 2.  
puddinghead: hinata wanted me to join his teams chat  
puddinghead: should i??  
imalwaysthisnice: NO NO WAY DONT DO IT  
imalwaysthisnice: NEVER EVER GO TO KARASUNO GROUP CHAT  
imalwaysthisnice: THE FIRST YEARS ALWAYS MAKE ONE, EVERY YEAR  
imalwaysthisnice: IVE BEEN IN A FEW BEFORE AND THEYRE ONLY TRYING TO CORRUPT YOUR MIND WITH MEMES KENMA, DONT DO IT DONT YOU DARE DO IT  
puddinghead: alright, but im 70% sure theyre not

russianblue: ah  
russianblue: did i miss something?)

 **literalsunshine** added **puddinghead** to the conversation.

yourultimatesenpai: who tf

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** renamed the conversation to **"INTRUDER :0".**

yourultimatesenpai: intRUDER ALERT  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: INTRUUUUUUUDEERRRRRR  
literalsunshine: guys fuck off its just kenma  
yourultimatesenpai: ohhhh  
yourultimatesenpai: hi kenma  
puddinghead: hey  
dadchi: I thought his hair reminded me of something............................  
sugamomma: ye same lmao  
puddinghead: hinata can i add kuroo  
puddinghead: i have something to prove to him  
literalsunshine: sureee why not  
literalsunshine: just because i think his hair is cool tho  
puddinghead: his hair is stupid

 **puddinghead** added **imalwaysthisnice** to the conversation.

 **puddinghead** added **russianblue** to the conversation.

imalwaysthisnice: wtf  
imalwaysthisnice: waIT SHUT UP KENMA MY HAIR IS AWESOME  
literalsunshine: YOUR HAIR IS AWWWESOMEEEEEE  
literalsunshine: HOW DO YOU STYLE IT????  
literalsunshine: PLS KUROO  
dadchi: Oh come on hinata you act like hes a celebrity  
imalwaysthisnice: i dont even style it tho wtf  
imalwaysthisnice: its literally just bedhead  
literalsunshine: SO COOOOOL  
puddinghead: so what did i tell you kuroo  
puddinghead: theyre not corrupting anybody's minds with memes  
literalsunshine: tch--  
kingofthecourt: uh--  
dadchi: ?  
literalsunshine: prepARE FOR TROUBLE  
kingofthecourt: AND MAKE IT DOUBLE  
literalsunshine: TO CORRUPT THE WORLD WITH BAD MEMES  
imalwaysthisnice: "what did i tell you, kuroo"  
kingofthecourt: TO RIP THE INTERNET APART BY THE SEAMS  
literalsunshine: TO DENOUNCE THE EVILS OF PEPE AND FEELS  
imalwaysthisnice: how about WHAT DID I TELL YOUUUU  
kingofthecourt: TO EXTEND OUR REACH TO GOOD MEME DEALS  
literalsunshine: HINATA  
kingofthecourt: KAGEYAMA  
literalsunshine: TEAM FREAK DUO MEMES OFF AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** renamed the conversation to **"TEAM FREAK DUO :0 :0".**

kingofthecourt: SURRENDER NOW OR PREPARE TO FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: nishinoya, thats right!  
yourultimatesenpai: tanaaaakaaaaa!  
puddinghead: ok so maybe they meme sometimes, but its not that much right kuroo  
puddinghead: right kuroo  
imalwaysthisnice: fuck this im gonna go hang out with bokuto

 **imalwaysthisnice** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **imalwaysthisnice** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes from TEAM FREAK DUO :0 :0

 **imalwaysthisnice** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **imalwaysthisnice** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes from TEAM FREAK DUO :0 :0

 **imalwaysthisnice** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **imalwaysthisnice** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes from TEAM FREAK DUO :0 :0

 **imalwaysthisnice** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **imalwaysthisnice** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes from TEAM FREAK DUO :0 :0  
imalwaysthisnice: IS THIS HELL  
puddinghead: i think this is your punishment kuroo  
imalwaysthisnice: PUNISHMENT FOR WHAT I DIDNT DO ANYTHING WRONG  
puddinghead: punishment for having such stupid hair

russianblue: did i miss something??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry kuroo (: (: youre stuck here (: (: forever and ever (: (: and the next day (: (: and the next day (: (: and the next day (: (: and the next day (: (:
> 
>  
> 
> also!!!!! if you have any ideas for chapter 10!!!!!!!!!!!! please tell me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! we must celebrate our 10th chapter!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> super (not very) special chapter 10!!!!!! thank u for reading my random bullshit and putting up with me haha!!

**literalsunshine** added **oikawaii** to the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** renamed the conversation to **"(;"**.

oikawaii: hey dipshits  
yourultimatesenpai: can you maybe call us something else other than dipshits?  
oikawaii: like what? (´ω｀)  
yourultimatesenpai: nisHINOYA TAKE IT AWAY  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: how about ｓｕｎｒｉｓｅ ｌａｎｄ  
oikawaii:  
oikawaii: i hate this chat why did i ever agree to this  
dadchi: AT IT WOULD APPEAR OIKAWAS HERE HUHHH HUHU HU HUHH HUH  
sugamomma: sorry oikawa he didnt get any sleep last night  
dadchi: YOU SHOULD TRY IT  
oikawaii: NO  
dadchi: TRYYYYYY ITTTTT  
oikawaii: nooooo  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: holy shit he must not have gotten any sleep if hes memeing  
yourultimatesenpai: omfg  
gucci: oikawa scares me  
oikawaii: why?? (*´д｀*)  
gucci: tsuKKI HELPPPPP  
TsukishimaKei: oikawa stop  
oikawaii: (╯3╰) i didnt even do anything  
gucci: HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
kingofthecourt: hinata how did you even add oikawa  
literalsunshine: one time he was all like  
literalsunshine: [OIKAWA VOICE] "oiii chibi-chaaaan~~~~~~~~" [peace sign peace sign] "give meee~ee`E~~~~~~ your skype, pleeeeease~~~~~"  
oikawaii: youre so much meaner online than off, chibi-chan  
yourultimatesenpai: COUGH COUGH  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: youre so much meaner offline than on, oikawa-san  
oikawaii: i feel personally attacked  
imalwaysthisnice: Well, so do I, but you don't see me complaining.  
imalwaysthisnice: ew regular grammar doesnt look rigth in this group chat  
oikawaii: kurOOOOOoOOOooOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOooooo ah yes kuroo my savior  
oikawaii: pls save me  
imalwaysthisnice: ok lol

literalsunshine: mooOOOoOOoOoOm  
kingofthecourt: WERE THIRSTY  
sugamomma: wELL I SHOULD HOPE SO  
sugamomma: YOU KIDS HAVE BEEN PLAYING VOLLEYBALL FOR THE PAST 9 HOURS  
oikawaii: wait what the fuck  
kingofthecourt: yeahhhhh...  
imalwaysthisnice: im gonna tell iwaizumi you swore  
oikawaii: dont he'll fuckin kick my ass  
imalwaysthisnice: fine fine  
sugamomma: how woULD YOU KIDS LIKE A DELICIOUS CHOCOLATEY GLASS OF CIRCLETIIIIIIINENENENENENEEEEEEEEeeEeEeEee  
literalsunshine: CIRLCETIIIIIIiIiIIiNnnNnEEEEeeeeEeE  
puddinghead: what is going on i was playing overwatch  
kingofthecourt: AaAAaAaaAAaaaAAAaAAaAAaAAAaaAAaAAaaAAAA  
puddinghead: ok im going back to playing overwatch  
sugamomma: GET THE MILK AND VINEGAR  
literalsunshine: [fucKING THROWS THE MILK]  
kingofthecourt: [VINEGAR]  
oikawaii: w h a t  
dadchi: heY GANG  
sugamomma: CIRCLETIEIEIENENENENE REREARRARRAREWAJFAAJJIEGFEJFL  
dadchi: [fucking leaves bye]  
sugamomma: MIX IT TOGETHER KIDS  
kingofthecourt: [FUCKING MIXES]  
literalsunshine: [also mixes]  
literalsunshine: *******[ALSO MIXESSSSS] AAaAAaAaAaaAaA  
sugamomma: its ready  
sugamomma: go tell oikawa  
oikawaii: what why am i involved in this  
oikawaii: i dont even know whats happening  
literalsunshine:  
literalsunshine: CIRCLETIIIIENENNENENEEEEE  
oikawaii: AAAAAAAAA

 **literalsunshine** renamed the conversation to **"CIRCLETINE"**.

oikawaii: LITERALLY WHAT THE FUCK  
oikawaii: FUCKING BYE

 **oikawaii** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **oikawaii** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: NOBODY ESCAPES CIRCLETINE  
oikawaii: i had a feeling that would happen

gucci: i think i figured out what makes me scared of oikawa  
oikawaii: what? (ノ_・。)  
gucci: hhhhhhhhhhhhhh  
oikawaii: GOD FUCKING DAMNIT  
gucci: tsuKKI I NEED AN ADULT  
TsukishimaKei: get away from this child oikawa  
imalwaysthisnice: what is it, yamaguchi?  
gucci: ummm  
gucci: its his name  
oikawaii: MY NAME?!  
gucci: YOUR!!!!! YOUR SKYPE NAME I MEAN!!!!!!!!!!!! THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH YOUR ACTUAL NAME IM SORRY DONT HURT ME!!!!!!!!  
TsukishimaKei: i will rip you into a million pieces  
oikawaii: ok ok fine  
oikawaii: kuroo  
imalwaysthisnice: what about his name  
gucci: its  
gucci: its too  
gucci: how do i say this  
gucci: its too kawaii  
oikawaii: but im kawaii, its only fair  
imalwaysthisnice: what else should it be??  
gucci: idk  
gucci: the grand king??  
gucci: sorry kageyama  
kingofthecourt: what  
oikawaii: S I G H  
grand_king: is that better  
gucci: yes  
gucci: thank you im sorry to cause any problems,,,,

grand_king: iwa-chan is scary who agrees  
literalsunshine: i agree he is almost as scary as kageyama  
grand_king: kageyamas not scary  
kingofthecourt: eugh  
kingofthecourt: i forgot oikawa was here

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: kageyama  
literalsunshine: im disappointed in you  
literalsunshine: shouldnt you know by now??  
literalsunshine: nobody escapes CIRCLETINE  
kingofthecourt: i hate this  
yourultimatesenpai: you say that too much, kageyama  
yourultimatesenpai: youre starting to sound as emo as bokuto did that one time  
imalwaysthisnice: *brokuto  
imalwaysthisnice: or if youre feelings spicy, bokut*bro  
imalwaysthisnice: also what do you mean that one time  
imalwaysthisnice: more like THOSE 300 TIMES  
grand_king: speaking of bokuto

 **grand_king** added **HOOTIMMAOWL** to the conversation.

imalwaysthisnice: BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
HOOTIMMAOWL: BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
imalwaysthisnice: BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
dadchi: Stop  
dadchi: Can everyone whos not on karasuno leave this is getting out of hand  
dadchi: More out of hand than last time  
literalsunshine: what happened last time?  
dadchi: I dont want to talk about it  
sugamomma: hes mentally scarred  
grand_king: ill leave for now, but dont underestimate me.  
grand_king: ill be back. (◡‿◡✿)

 **grand_king** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **grand_king** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes CIRLCETINE  
literalsunshine: oh shIT SORRY FORCE OF HABIT  
dadchi: HINATA IM GOING TO KILL YOU  
yachi: am i technically on karasuno orrrr  
dadchi: Yes yachi youre our manager  
yachi: oh  
yachi: oh yeah  
imalwaysthisnice: goodbye my dudes  
imalwaysthisnice: but brokuto and i will be back as well  
HOOTIMMAOWL: meh we always have the meme chat

(literalsunshine: ADD ME TO THE MEME CHAT ADD ME TO THE MEME CHAT  
HOOTIMMAOWL: (; )

 **HOOTIMMAOWL** left the conversation.

imalwaysthisnice: adieu!

 **imalwaysthisnice** left the conversation.

puddinghead: huh? i was playing wadanohara  
puddinghead: oh  
puddinghead: ok bye  
puddinghead: talk to you later shouyou  
literalsunshine: yeah!!!

 **puddinghead** left the conversation.

dadchi: Is that everyone?  
literalsunshine: yeah  
literalsunshine: pretty sure

yourultimatesenpai: some  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: are the crystal gems  
yourultimatesenpai: noya we just made the ultimate meme  
dadchi: I hate all of you im leaving the team  
sugamomma: daichi no  
dadchi: Daichi yes  
youtultimatesenpai: if you change the last i in daichis name its daicho and that reminds me of nachos  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wtf bro  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: actually lets call daichi that from now on  
yourultimatesenpai: ok lmao

 **russianblue** left the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: whO WAS THAT  
yourultimatesenpai: INTRUUUUDER  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: INTRUDER  
dadchi: Theyre like dogs i swear  
literalsunshine: that was just lev

(russianblue: i feel like someones talking about me  
imalwaysthisnice: probably about how annoying you are)


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> :0 :0 :0 :0 drama alert in team karasuno

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> apologies for any non-purposeful typos, my fingers were flying across the keyboard writing this one and i didnt catch many of them (;\  
> this chapter is a real adventure, buckle your seatbelts and prepare for kagehina

kingofthecourt: OK, 1 THING SUGA, FUCK YOU  
wakemeupinside: ????????????  
sugamomma: WELL YOU KNOW WHAT  
sugamomma: SOMEONE LIKE YOU DOESNT BELONG ON THIS TEAM  
dadchi: What  
kingofthecourt: FINE  
kingofthecourt: I WOULDNT WANT TO PLAY ON THE SAME TEAM AS SOMEONE WHO SHIPS EREMIN  
sugamomma: I CANT BELIEVE YOU SHIP EREJEAN  
wakemeupinside: oh not this shit again  
dadchi: What  
kingofthecourt: ITS A GREAT SHIP  
kingofthecourt: EREN AND JEAN HAVE BEEN THROUGH A LOT ):  
sugamomma: COULDNT I SAY THE SAME FOR EREN AND ARMIN?!?!?!?!?/1/1/!?!/!/1?/!/!?!  
kingofthecourt: NOT????? REALLY?????  
sugamomma: YOURE OFF THE TEAM  
kingofthecourt: FINE I DIDNT WANNA BE ON THIS TEAM ANYWAY  
kingofthecourt:EVEN IF I HAVE TO TOSS, SPIKE, AND RECEIVE ALL BY MYSELF  
sugamomma: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE  
kingofthecourt: FINE  
sugamomma: FINE  
kingofthecourt: IM GLAD  
sugamomma: SO AM I  
kingofthecourt: ...

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

wakemeupinside: what was that  
dadchi: What

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: no one escapes CIRCLETINE  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we're not even talking about circletine anymore someone change it  
dadchi: Suga would you mind telling me what is going on between you and kageyama  
sugamomma: HE SHIPS EREJEAN  
kingofthecourt: YEAH ITS A PERFECTLY FINE SHIP  
sugamomma: NO ITS NOT THEY FUCKING HATE EACH OTHER  
kingofthecourt: YEAH WELL EREN AND ARMIN ARE SUPPOSED TO BE BEST FRIENDS NOT FUCKING LOVERS  
sugamomma: OKAY YOU SHUT UP I COULD SAY THAT ABOUT YOU AND HINATA  
kingofthecourt: SUGA YOU SAID YOU WOULDNT FUCKIGN SAY AYNTHFING ABOTU THAT!!!!!!!112OKRWLE SFUCKCIGNG RDHFN

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

literalsunshine: wait what  
literalsunshine: did i see my name  
literalsunshine: yeah thaTS TOTALLY MY NAME WHAT THE FUCK  
sugamomma: ............ shit  
dadchi: GODDAMNIT SUGA  
literalsunshine: WHAT DO YOU MEAN "YOU AND HINATA"  
literalsunshine: SUGA WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT  
sugamomma: FUCK FUCKFUCK FUCJFUIKCUFKJUCKU FUCKFU CJUFKC

 **sugamomma** left the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: o shit wait  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wait what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: whats going on  
yourultimatesenpai: o shit  
yourultimatesenpai: holllyy shit  
yourultimatesenpai: things are happening

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **sugamomma** to the conversation.

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

literalsunshine: NOBODY ESCAPES CIRCLETINE  
literalsunshine: OH GODDAMNIT KAGEYAMA

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: CAN ONE OF YOU TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK SUGA MEANT???  
literalsunshine: "YOU AND HINATA"  
literalsunshine: WHAT  
kingofthecourt: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
kingofthecourt: SUGAUG SGUA YOU FNEED DUFKC UFKCIGN SAVE ME  
kingofthecourt: SUGAAAAA YOU SAID YOU UCKING WOUDLNT

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

literalsunshine: GET YOUR SECRET KEEPING ASS BACK HERE  
literalsunshine: W AHT THE CFJUCK HE BLOCKED ME  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ahh, i see whats going on here  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i think wed better leave the kouhais to their thing  
yourultimatesenpai: ye  
literalsunshine: EVE N??????? YOUT GYUSY?????? UNDDRSTAND?????????????????????????????????? WTF THE FUCK  
literalsunshine:AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I HATE THIS  
literalsunshine: SUGAAA?????????????  
dadchi: EVERYONE SHUT UP  
dadchi: We will discuss this tomorrow, at practive

literalsunshine: literally what the fuck is going on  
literalsunshine: i havent seen kageyama all day  
literalsunshine: suga's avoiding me like the plague  
literalsunshine: and tanaka and noya are being little shits they wont tell me anything  
literalsunshine: guys please  
literalsunshine: im serious  
sugamomma: i promised kageyama i wouldnt tell anyone  
literalsunshine: tell anyone what  
literalsunshine: i guess you already told me, but i dont know what you told me??  
sugamomma: kageyama should be the one to tell you  
literalsunshine: he blOCKED ME  
dadchi: Dont start with the caps locks again or ill block you  
literalsunshine: ):  
sugamomma: he blocked me too  
sugamomma: daichi can i borrow your phone  
dadchi: Yes

(dadchi: kageyama  
kingofthecourt: daichi if suga asked you to talk to me i dont wanna hear it  
kingofthecourt: i cant believe this  
dadchi: its suga..........  
dadchi: kageyama im serious im really sorry i didnt mean to  
dadchi: i was caught up in the moment  
kingofthecourt: sorry doesnt cut it  
kingofthecourt: fuck off suga, i never want to speak to you again)

sugamomma: i used daichis phone to talk to him and he told me, and i quote,  
sugamomma: "fuck off suga, i never want to speak to you again"  
sugamomma: end quote  
sugamomma: he then proceeded to block daichi  
literalsunshine: i have an idea  
literalsunshine: yamaguchi  
gucci: uh?? ye??????  
literalsunshine: youre cute he wont block you  
literalsunshine: probably  
literalsunshine: i think youre the best bet  
literalsunshine: can you talk to him??? i dont know why hes this mad at me  
gucci: ill try, i guess

(gucci: kageyama  
kingofthecourt: yamaguchi dont  
gucci: but kageyama  
kingofthecourt: no  
gucci: ...  
gucci: ok sorry)

gucci: sorry guys i did my best  
TsukishimaKei: i will smack some sense into that volleyball idiot  
literalsunshine: tsukishima im pretty sure youll just make it worse  
TsukishimaKei: you underestimate me  
TsukishimaKei: being as quiet as i am, i deal with emotions a lot  
TsukishimaKei: this will be easy  
gucci: go tsukki!!!  
TsukishimaKei: shut up yamaguchi

(TsukishimaKei: listen up, idiot.  
TsukishimaKei: i dont care what you have to say on the matter.  
TsukishimaKei: im not one to really get caught in your dumb drama, but well  
TsukishimaKei: youre causing a commotion.  
TsukishimaKei: i know how you feel about that dumb shrimpy.  
TsukishimaKei: i knew before today. you dont hide it well.  
TsukishimaKei: i think youre hurting his feelings kageyama.  
TsukishimaKei: and i know you dont want that.  
kingofthecourt: stick to calling me a volleyball idiot. kageyama sounds weird coming from you.)

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: bakAGEYAMA PLEASE  
literalsunshine: WHATS GOING ONNNNNN  
kingofthecourt: uh  
kingofthecourt: im  
sugamomma: kageyama i know this isnt how you wouldve liked, but nows the best time if youre going to do it.  
kingofthecourt: right, ok, uh  
kingofthecourt: hinata i love you  
literalsunshine: what  
literalsunshine: i love you too??  
literalsunshine: kageyama was that all  
kingofthecourt: wwwWWWWAIT  
kingofthecourt: WHAT THEFUCK  
literalsunshine: what  
literalsunshine: kageyama were dating right? it shoudnt be a big deal to say that  
kingofthecourt: oH MY GOD.  
sugamomma: hHOHJHOHOOLY SHIT OMFG IM CYRING  
dadchi: ARE YOPU SERIPUS  
dadchi: ARE YOU SERIOUS/??????/  
literalsunshine: ???????????????????? what  
TsukishimaKei: did i just get all touchy feely for no reason  
TsukishimaKei: i hate this  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
wakemeupinside: I CANNOT BELIEVE  
ROLLINGTHUDNER: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH  
yourultimatesenpai: is this the real life  
kingofthecourt: NO WAY  
kingofthecourt: NO WAY, NO WAY NO WAY  
yourultimatesenpai: is this just fantasy  
yourultimatesenpai: caught in a landsliiiiiiiiiiiiide  
yourultimatesenpai: no escape from reality  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
sugamomma: GUYS IM FUCKING SERIOUS IM CRYING FROM LAUGHING  
wakemeupinside: I CANNOT FUCKING BELIEVE THIS  
literalsunshine: hahaha guess what i dont know whats going on again this is great  
kingofthecourt: HINATA  
kingofthecourt: HINATA HAVE YOU  
kingofthecourt: OH MY GOD  
kingofthecourt: HAVE YOU THOUGHT WE WERE DATING THIS ENTIRE TIME?  
literalsunshine: yes?  
kingofthecourt: WE WERENT  
literalsunshine: i  
literalsunshine: ... oh  
literalsunshine: i  
literalsunshine: what?  
kingofthecourt: HINATA THATS WHY I FREAKED OUT  
kingofthecourt: HINATA I HAVE BEEN IN LOVE WITH YOU FOR ALL THIS TIME WITHOUT YOU FUCKING KNOWING  
literalsunshine: wait so  
literalsunshine: im confused are we dating now  
kingofthecourt: I  
kingofthecourt: YES  
kingofthecourt: IF YOU WANT TO???  
literalsunshine: of course, i thought we already fucking were  
TsukishimaKei: well isnt that sweet  
TsukishimaKei: now stop or ill get diabetes  
literalsunshine: SHUT UP STINGYSHIMA I COULD SAY THE SAME ABOUT YOU AND YAMAGUCHI  
gucci: holy shit hinata no  
TsukishimaKei: do you want to die, shrimpy.  
literalsunshine: also, kageyama and suga, youre both wrong about everything  
literalsunshine: jeankasa is best ship. no ifs ands or buts.  
kingofthecourt: its really hard to be mad right now but ill fIND A WAY  
sugamomma: hINATA YOU SHUT YOUR BITCH MOUTH UP

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> apologies, my friends, but a few of you gave me suggestions for this chapter. i started writing it with full intent to use them but it just got out of hand (,;  
> next chapter, i promise!  
> i hope you enjoyed
> 
> (and just so you know, im always open to suggestions!!!!! you wanna see something between tsukki and yamaguchi in the next chap??? yeet im right there with you my dude. you wanna see kenma and oikawa interact???? sure bro i got you. you wanna see tanaka talking about fucking madoka magica?? YOU GOT IT!!!!!!)


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> there were like 30 things that i wanted to fit into this chapter but i couldnt so heres my checklist for future chaps
> 
> -shoes  
> -high kicks  
> -HEYEAYEAYEA  
> -REAL tsukkiyama interaction

gucci: tsukki  
gucci: tsuKKI THIS IS A LITTLE IMPORTNAT ANSWER ASAP PLEASE

gucci: TSUKKI ITS BEEN 5 MINUTES WHERE U AT

gucci: TSUKKIIIIIIEIEIEIEIEIITFEWOH JR R  
TsukishimaKei: what  
gucci: TSUKKI1!!1/11!!!!!!!!!!! OMFG WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN I NEED YOU RIGTH NOW PLASE  
TsukishimaKei: yamaguchi whats wrong  
gucci: I GOT BEAT UP  
TsukishimaKei: no you didnt  
gucci: yeah youre right, it was just a tesst  
gucci: but for SOME REASON ONLY NOW IS WHEN YOU RESPONDED  
TsukishimaKei: my brother gave me a movie. he said he was dumb and he didnt like it so he was giving it to me.  
gucci: WHAT KIND OF EXCUSE IS THAT  
TsukishimaKei: it was about dinosaurs  
gucci: tsukki i s2g  
literalsunshine: what movie was it  
TsukishimaKei: jurassic park  
gucci: you guys know whats great  
gucci: listening to yamaguchis problems  
gucci: you should try it its the best  
TsukishimaKei: okay yamaguchi, what  
gucci: wow so sympathetic thanks  
TsukishimaKei: OMG YAMA!!1!!1!! WHATS WRONG R U OK>???//?////  
TsukishimaKei: is that better  
gucci: no  
gucci: anyways  
gucci: i have a v v important question  
TsukishimaKei: right, okay  
TsukishimaKei: what  
gucci: yes yes dO YOU LIKE TO PARTY PARTY???  
yourultimatesenpai: holy shit  
yourultimatesenpai: (yes i like to party party)  
TsukishimaKei: wait what  
gucci: DO YOU LIKE TO DANCY DANCE???????  
ROLLINGTHINDER: (yes i wore my party pants)  
TsukishimaKei: this is the reason i hate this team  
TsukishimaKei: its full of fucking memers

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** renamed the conversation to **"GERMAN SPARKLE PARTY".**

yourultimatesenpai: (party pants party pants party pants party pants party pants party pants)  
gucci: I LIKE GERMAN SPARKLE PARTY  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: (sparkle party sparkle party)  
gucci: VERY HARDCORE SPARKLE PARTY  
yourultimatesenpai: (sparkle party sparkle party)  
TsukishimaKei: talk to me again sometime when youre not going to meme, okay  
gucci: nokay  
gucci: wenn es gibt kein glitzer es gibt kein party, ja.

sugamomma: whAT WOULD YOU LIKE FOR BREAKFAST YACHI??  
yachi: muffiiiiiiiiiiins  
TsukishimaKei: NO NO N NONO NON ONONO NON O  
TsukishimaKei: I LITERALLY CANNOT TAKE ANY MORE MEMES IM GONNA HAVE A FUCKING PANIC ATTACK  
gucci: because of memes  
TsukishimaKie: FUCK OFF YAMAGUCHI IM GOPNNA GO WATCH JURASSIC PARK  
sugamomma: thats right  
sugamomma: at karasuno muffins, we know that muffins make the BEST BREAKFAST!!!!!1!!!!  
sugamomma: so why not try all of our EXITING NEW FLAVORS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
gucci: tsukki do you wanna try all of sugas EXITING NEW FLAVORS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
TsukishimaKei: no!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
sugamomma: raspberry  
sugamomma: cranberry!  
sugamomma: apples!!  
sugamomma: cinnamon  
sugamomma: pecan  
TsukishimaKei: i will NOT TRY ANY OF THESE GODDAMN MEME CUPCAKES  
gucci: theyre muffins  
TsukishimaKei: F CUK YOU  
sugamomma: pumpkin!  
sugamomma: nut  
sugamomma: date nut!!!!!!!  
literalsunshine: stingyshiiiiima (:  
literalsunshine: you better not (:  
literalsunshine: be thinking (:  
sugamomma: lemon poppyseed muffin!  
literalsunshine: of leaaaaaaving (:  
TsukishimaKei: i hate this  
sugamomma: banaaanaaaaaaa!  
sugamomma: orange  
dadchi: Suga  
sugamomma: peach!  
sugamomma: strawberry  
dadchi: Suga please  
sugamomma: blueberry!  
sugamomma: boysenberry!  
dadchi: Suga i think its time to stop  
sugamomma: almond!  
dadchi: Suga i  
sugamomma: choco choco chip!  
dadchi: P l s  
sugamomma: carrot!  
sugamomma: gooseberry!  
sugamomma: pumpernickel  
dadchi: SUGA  
sugamomma: fish.  
dadchi: SUGAAAAA  
dadchi: Wait what  
gucci: tsukki are you dead  
TsukishimaKei: yes  
sugamomma: paperclip!  
dadchi: Wait suga  
sugamomma: ink  
sugamomma: bird!  
dadchi: Suga these muffins are starting to  
sugamomma: shampoo!!!!  
TsukishimaKei: is there a dinosaur muffin because thats all i want right now  
TsukishimaKei: free me from these memes  
sugamomma: star wars muffin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
yourultimatesenpai: woAAAHHHHH I WANT A STAR WARS MUFFIN  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: SAME SAME  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: SUGA IF WE CAME OVER TO YOUR HOUSE AFTER SCHOOL WOULD YOU MAKE US STAR WARS MUFFINS  
sugamomma: bullfrog!  
kingofthecourt: holy shit i thought that said bullshit at first  
literalsunshine: kageyama pls  
sugamomma: crickets!  
gucci: what are these insane muffin flavors  
sugamomma: cigarettes  
dadchi: OMFG SUGA YOU SHOULD MAKE COACH SOME CIGARETTE MUFFINS  
sugamomma: isreali palastinian conflict muffins!  
yourultimatesenpai: guys............ i think we lost suga  
sugamomma: bits of glass muffin!  
sugamomma: owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww  
sugamomma: asbestos!  
sugamomma: IM BAKING MUFFINS ASBESTOS I CAN!!! AHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHH  
youtultimatesenpai: ooohhhhhhhh noya  
yourultimatesenpai: i finally figured out the obscure internet hes referencing  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wtf ive known the whole time  
sugamomma: monkey!  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: tanaka pls  
yourultimatesenpai: ):  
sugamomma: al jerome muffin  
sugamomma: elephant  
dadchi: Whats with all the zoo animals  
literalsunshine: ok daichi there have been literally two zoo animals  
sugamomma: pencil  
sugamomma: newspaper  
dadchi: Shut up hinata  
sugamomma: fire!!!!!  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: fire muffin is a muffin i can get behind  
sugamomma: imAAAAGINARY MUFFIN  
yourultimatesenpai: ok suga we get it  
yourultimatesenpai: youre an obscure internet memer  
yourultimatesenpai: you can stop now  
sugamomma: cartoon muffin!  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: tanaka i think its too late  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: hes too deep into the mom role  
sugamomma: blood.  
dadchi: Blood?  
sugamomma: whaT MUFFIC WOULD YOU LIKE FOR BREAKFAST YACHI  
yachi: ................ I LOST MY APPETITE  
sugamomma: youll eat a muffin.  
sugamomma: youll eat it and LIKE IT.  
dadchi: Um  
dadchi: I am generally uncomfortable  
sugamomma: sO TRY ALL OF OUR DELICIOUS KARASUNO MUFFINS  
sugamomma: AT KARASUNO MUFFINS!!!!!!!!!!!  
dadchi: Um can you change the name or something because thats the name of out team and blood muffin doesnt seem like such a good promotional muffic  
literalsunshine: is that all youre worried about  
TsukishimaKei: okay if everyones done fucking with my emotions im gonna go live in the closet for the rest of my life  
gucci: tsukki are you ok  
TsukishimaKei: shut  
TsukishimaKei: shut up yamaguchi  
gucci: yeahhhhh, youre probably fine  
yourultimatesenpai: does anyone find it odd that suga has just stopped  
yourultimatesenpai: like usually after we meme we go back to normal but suga  
yourultiamtesenpai: suga are you okay??  
sugamomma: why do you ask  
dadchi: Okay hes probably fine

TsukishimaKei: BABY BABY BABY OOOOOH  
TsukishimaKei: LIKE BABY BABY BABY OOOOOOOOOOH  
TsukishimaKei: LIKE BABY BABY BABY OOOOOH  
TsukishimaKei: THOUGHT YOUD ALWAYS BE MIIIIIIINE  
gucci: tsuKUKII ARE YOU OKAY,,  
TsukishimaKei: UM,  
TsukishimaKei: UH,  
TsukishimaKei: YES THIS IS KEI  
gucci: oh, hi akiteru  
literalsunshine: whos akiteru?  
TsukishimaKei: ugh, i am  
TsukishimaKei: my name is tsukishima akiteru!! im keis big bro!!  
gucci: howd you get tsukki to let you on his account?  
TsukishimaKei: well, actually, he didnt let me  
TsukishimaKei: but i wanna see what keis up to!!!!!!! hes always so distant  
literalsunshine: EWEWEW I DONT LIKE IT I DONT LIKE IT  
literalsunshine: [I DONT LIKE IT.mp4](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jtKkPhzF2cU)  
TsukishimaKei: dont like what??  
literalsunshine: AAAHAWHSHFHSGHHGHUIDRJMJFKDKJKJFDFDLKFD IT LOOKS SO UNNATURAL  
kingofthecourt: he means that youre on your brothers account.  
kingofthecourt: usually your brother is  
kingofthecourt: well  
kingofthecourt: distant, i guess, to us too  
kingofthecourt: and well, having someone like you talk so differently from him  
literalsunshine: ITS WEIRD I DONT LIKW IT I DONT LIKE ITTTTTTT  
wakemeupinside: rip hinata  
literalsunshine: ASAHI WILL YOU COME TO MY FUNERAL  
wakemeupinside: yes  
wakemeupinside: maybe  
literalsunshine: ASAHIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
wakemeupinside: SORRY I WAS JUST KIDDING  
TsukishimaKei: do i really talk that differently ffro mkeisxoaemrmawekra  
TsukiahimaKei: sdh tjkwrae tvarejtoiwrenjrekvdckmcfmklfcmklcdlmkefjileurrysairer55  
literalsunshine: AAAAAAAA TSUKISHIMA IS KILLING HIS BIG BROTHERERRERER!!! FDUCKIGNG

 **literalsunshine** left the conversation.

 **kingofthecourt** added **literalsunshine** to the conversation.

TsukishimaKei: im not talking to my brother for a week  
gucci: thats mean tsukki  
TsukishimaKei: its a just punishment  
gucci: ): nothing you ever do is a just punishment  
gucci: you know like that time you stabbed me in the hand  
TsukishimaKei: that was just for you TELLING THEM ABOUT THE THING YUOU STARTED IT  
literalsunshine: *The Incident™  
TsukishimaKei: fuck off hinata  
literalsunshine: thats not very nice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that probably wasnt the tsukkiyama everyone was expecting lmao  
> i can explain  
> actually i cant  
> i promise there will be better interaction in future chapters
> 
> also!!!!!! ive been getting such a good reaction to this my friends!!!! its such a dumb, silly, purely goofy fic and id just like to thank you all for supporting me!!! as always, suggestions are not required, but encouraged!


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> new to-do list  
> -shoes  
> -high kicks  
> -HEYEAYEAYEA  
> -REAL tsukkiyama interaction  
> -the rickroll thing  
> -knock knock  
> -whos there  
> -orange  
> -orange who  
> -be a dick to the readers

literalsunshine: The Rumor Come Out: Does Kageyama Tobio is Gay?  
kingofthecourt: hinata at any other time i would be willing but please its like 3 am i just want to sleep  
literalsunshine: Kageyama Tobio is gay is the most discussed in the media in the few years ago. Even it has happened in 2012, but some of the public still curious about what is exactly happening and to be the reason there is a rumor comes out about his gay.  
dadchi: Hinata  
dadchi: It is exactly 3:34 am  
dadchi: I cannot have another sleepless night go to bed please  
literalsunshine: At that time he became the massive social networking rumor. The public, especially his fans are shocked. He just came out with his bad rumor which is spread massively. This time is not about his volleyball career, but his bad rumor.  
kingofthecourt: i have to gET UP EARLY HINATA PLEASE  
dadchi: HINATA WE ARE BEGGING YOU  
kingofthecourt: im not begging him  
dadchi: Do you want to sleep tonight kageyama  
kingofthecourt: WERE BEGGING YOU  
literalsunshine: The rumor is out of standardize of hoax, according the last reported this volleyball player revealed himself as homosexual. Do you still believe or not, this rumor is really much talked by people even in a person of his fans.  
kingofthecourt: hinata if you shut up right now i wont call you dumbass once tomorrow  
literalsunshine: (; ok

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> orange you glad i wrote this bullshit chapter


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> new new to-do list  
> -shoes  
> -HEYEAYEAYEA  
> -the rickroll thing  
> -real tsukkiyama action  
> -be a dick to the readers  
> -mystic fuckign messenger can you believe
> 
> yall have the audacity to give me such good suggestions i cant believe you

ROLLINGTHUNDER: kei  
yourultimatesenpai: kei  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: keiiiiii  
TsukishimaKei: stop  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what no  
yourultimatesenpai: keeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii  
TsukishimaKei: STOP  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: kei  
yourultimatesenpai: key  
yourultimatesenpai: *kei  
TsukishimaKei: WHAT DO YOU WANT  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we have a proposal.  
yourultimatesenpai: and not the marriage kind  
TsukishimaKei: what  
yourultimatesenpai: heres our proposal:  
yourultimatesenpai: if you meme, we will stop harassing you with memes.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: (probably; see fine print)  
TsukishimaKei: what will i get out of that  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: us not memeing you  
TsukishimaKei: ugh i guess thats sufficient  
TsukishimaKei: yamaguchi, would you care to aid me in my memes?  
gucci: i thoUGH YOUD NEVER ASK TSUKKI  
TsukishimaKei: shut up yamaguchi  
gucci: sorry tsukki  
gucci: anyway do you mean Our Meme  
TsukishimaKei: yes that one  
gucci: yES IM READYY

yourultimatesenpai: are you gonna do it or nah  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ye dont be wimps!!!!! WIMPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
TsukishimaKei: isnt that my line?  
literalsunshine: do you guys wanna hear a story  
yourultimatesenpai: no were busy  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: sorry hinata  
literalsunshine: ok im gonna tell you anyway  
literalsunshine: so the other day one of my friends on tumblr kept posting about boobs  
literalsunshine: but it wasnt like, "sexy" boob posts  
yourultimatesenpai: hinata  
literalsunshine: first she was talking about the word boob  
literalsunshine: and then she was talking about how theyre just lumps of fat ("why do people even think theyre attractive" -my friend)  
literalsunshine: lmfao idk i just felt like you should know  
yourultimatesenaoi: wow interesting  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wait whats her url  
yourultimatesenpai: nOYA!>>?!/!/!/!?!/1/ I AM BETRAYED. I THOUGHT. WE HAD,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, SOMETHING SPECIIAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLL  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: sorry lmao i wanna see the boob posts  
literalsunshine: auntie-faygo.tumblr.com  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: thank ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  
yourultimatesenapi: noya i cant believe u  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: here do you wanna see the post??? ill link it  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: [http://auntie-faygo.tumblr.com/post/141644772410/lmao-what](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ)  
yourultimatesenpai: ok wait a sec

yourultimatesenpai: noya i cant believe you went this far to fucking do that  
yourultimatesenpai: we arent friends anymore  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: lmao you knew id get you someday bro  
yourultimatesenpai: how could you do this to me  
TsukishimaKei: i was walking through the forest of moccasin breath  
yourultimatesenpai: omFG,  
TsukishimaKei: when i saw a troll boy wearing tight pants  
TsukishimaKei: i want to ooooown them  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: HOLY,,,,,,, HO, L, YFUKC, IG ,N, SHIT  
TsukishimaKei: but can you even dance in those pants  
gucci: waTCH ME WOMAN  
TsukishimaKei: they made him move like a vessel of shimmy  
TsukishimaKei: all sweet and tender like a tiny baby kitty  
ROLLIGNTHUNDER: IM SOBBING  
TsukishimaKei: i need to get some  
dadchi: Whats happening in this chat  
TsukishimaKei: put my body in some  
dadchi: Never mind  
TsukishimaKei: then i can rule the laaaand  
TsukishimaKei: am i done now  
yourultimatesenpai: SURE YEAH WHATEVER OMGFGGF,G,, HAHAHHA  
yourultimatesenpai: CAN YOU FUCKIGN BEILEIVE IM SOVBING  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHA  
TsukishimaKei: thanks yamaguchi  
gucci: (;

sugamomma: do you ever juust think 'huh i havent sneezed in a while'  
sugamomma: and then like 3 minutes later you sneeze like 35 times  
literalsunshine: I do not sneeze. I am not of this world.  
kingofthecourt: hinata ive seen you sneeze at least 4000 times  
literalsunshine: ):

yourultimatesenpai: why do people act like drinking orange juice after brushing their teeth is so terrible  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: //leaves  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: bye  
yourultimatesenpai: im serious wtf  
dadchi: HOW THE FUCK  
sugamomma: im literally baffled  
yourultimatesenpai: i dont  
yourultimatesenpai: understand  
wakemeupinside: tanaka im telling the principal and im gonna make him put you in detention for this with my "Threateningly Mature Looks", as described by daichi  
yourultimatesenpai: cries  
TsukishimaKei: i dont get it either.  
literalsunshine: thATS IT THAT S FUCKING IT, NOW IM SURE TUSKISHIMA IS DMEON SPAWN  
gucci: TSUKKI WHAT THE FUCK I TRUSTED YOU  
literalsunshine: SATEON SPAWM  
TsukishimaKei: egh  
kingofthecourt: im not gonna say anything  
literalsunshine: [gASP]  
literalsunshine: KAGEYAMA YOU DONT MEAN  
kingofthecourt: fuCK  
literalsunshine: DONT TELL ME YOU CAN BRUSH YOUR TEETH AND THEN DRINK ORANGE JUICE WITHOUT BLINKING A FUCKING EYE  
kingofthecourt: YES??  
dadchi: What the fuck im kicking you all off the team  
kingofthecourt: NO I MEAN NO  
literalsunshine: i disown you as a teammate  
sugamomma: baffled


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> skeletor

literalsunshine: kageyama you know how we were talking about names yesterday  
kingofthecourt: yeah? diD YOU FIND A GOOD ONE?????  
literalsunshine: well, no, kinda  
literalsunshine: we were thinking too hard about it!!!! what if we name it something simple, like  
literalsunshine: like george  
wakemeupinside: wtf  
kingofthecourt: george? no thats a dumb name  
wakemeupinside: what are you guys talking about  
literalsunshine: names  
wakemeupinside: i  
wakemeupinside: well i can see that but names for what  
kingofthecourt: uhhhhhh  
kingofthecourt: o shit  
literalsunshine: what  
kingofthecourt: we foRGOT TO ASK PERMISSION TO NAME IT  
literlasunshine: S HTI  
wakemeupinside: NAME WHAT  
kingofthecourt: QUICK HINATA ASK  
literalsunshine: NO WAY IM NOT DOING IT YOU DO IT  
kingofthecourt: NO NOO NONONO NO NO ON ONN YOU DO IT  
literalsunshine: YOU DO IT  
wakemeupinside: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOIU GAUYSY FOCKLTNKA ABOUT  
kingofthecourt: YOUUUU, YOU DO IT  
literalsunshine: ILL GIVE YOU MILK IF YOU DO IT  
kingofthecourt: huh, compelling  
kingofthecourt: bUT CANT I JUST BUY MILK MYSELF  
literalsunshine: ISNT IT BETTER IF I PAY?!?!?!??!?!/!  
kingofthecourt: UHHHH UMM  
kingofthecourt: ILL LET YOU WALL SLAM ME IF YOU DO IT  
literalsunshine: sold to the boy with the orange hair  
kingofthecourt: haha yes  
wakemeupinside: ok hinata what are you doing  
literalsunshine: sugaaaaa-senpaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii  
sugamomma: what the fuck  
literalsunshine: what  
sugamomma: you only call me -senpai when you want something  
literalsunshine: um  
literalsunshine: me and kageyama uhhh  
literalsunshine: we want permission for something  
wakemeupinside: permission for what  
sugamomma: yeah what asahi said  
literalsunshine: we want to name your mole!!!  
sugamomma: i  
sugamomma: my mole  
wakemeupinside: wh  
sugamomma: you  
sugamomma: you want to name my mole  
literalsunshine: yes  
sugamomma: what  
literalsunshine: can we  
sugamomma: i  
sugamomma: WHY  
literalsunshine: well you havent named it right??  
sugamomma: well no  
sugamomma: but like  
literalsunshine: thEN WE WANNA NAME IT  
literalsunshine: PLEAAAASEEEEEE SUGA-SENPAI  
sugamomma: hm  
sugamomma: only if you both call me mom  
literalsunshine: MOM PLEASE  
kingofthecourt: MOMMMMM  
sugamomma: heheh  
sugamomma: again!  
kingofthecourt: MOM!!!!!!!!  
literalsunshine: MOM  
sugamomma: heheheheheh  
sugamomma: AGAIN  
dadchi: Okay thats enough of that  
sugamomma: ok fine name my mole  
sugamomma: but like  
sugamomma: why do you watn to name it  
literalsunshine: ???? because it doesnt have one  
kingofthecourt: now that thats out of the way  
kingofthecourt: were not naming it george thats stupid  
literalsunshine: IS NOT  
literalsunshine: george is perfectly fine  
kingofthecourt: i dont like it  
literalsunshine: why not  
kingofthecourt: [kinggeorge.jpeg](http://cdn.history.com/sites/2/2013/11/George-III-Hero-AB.jpeg)  
literalsunshine: do you have something against kings  
kingofthecourt: maybe  
literalsunshine: pffAHAHAHAHAHA  
kingofthecourt: ),; cries  
literalsunshine: nO STOP I DONT LIKE IT  
literalsunshine: ITS TOO UNCHARACTERISTIC I DONT LIKE IT  
TsukishimaKei: my, what a big word hinata  
literalsunshine: you shut up  
literalsunshine: anyway  
literalsunshine: if were not naming it george idk what to name it so  
kingofthecourt: lets name it milk  
literalsunshine: pffFfafwkejsdga OMFG KAGEYMAA IM CCRYING,,  
kingofthecourt: so were naming it milk then right  
literalsunshine: nope no way  
sugamomma: ok youre not naming my mole after your favorite goddamn beverage  
kingofthecourt: ),,,,,,;  
literalsunshine: oMFG NO WAY STOP  
kingofthecourt: hmm  
kingofthecourt: daichi what do you think  
dadchi: I think this is stupid why would you name a mole  
literalsunshine: ok,,,,,,,  
literalsunshine: but what do you think we should name it  
dadchi: Saori Sakoda  
kingofthecourt: oh my god  
sugamomma: NO STOP TRYING TO NAME MY MOLE WEIRD THINGS  
yachi: i never really noticed suga-sans mole before...  
yachi: but now i have the suggen urge to poke it.  
sugamomma: HUH???? WHAT  
sugamomma: this is getting weird...  
gucci: suga has a mole?  
sugamomma: yeah  
gucci: SINCE WHEN??????  
sugamomma: since always???????????  
sugamomma: its under my left eye  
gucci: how have i never noticed this  
literalsunshine: lets name it suga jr  
sugamomma: omfg im wheezing  
sugamomma: no  
kingofthecourt: how about roz  
literalsunshine: roz?  
kingofthecourt: from monsters inc  
sugamomma: tempting but no  
literalsunshine: IK NOW!!!!!  
literalsunshine: lets name it seijoh  
dadchi: No  
sugamomma: what even is this anymore  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: lets name it rick astley  
literalsunshine: no.  
dadchi: Out of the question  
yourultimatesenpai: FUCKK NO  
kingofthecourt: why would you even

ROLLINGTHUNDER: and i said heYEAYEAYEAYEA HEYEAYEA  
yourultimatesenpai: I SAID HEY  
yourultimatesenpai: WHATS GOIN ONNNNN  
literalsunshine: lets name the mole heman  
kingofthecourt: hinata no  
ROLLINGSENPAI: AND HE TRIIIIIEEEEEESSSS  
literalsunshine: she-ra  
kingofthecourt: NO  
literalsunshine: skeletor?  
sugamomma: yes  
yourultimatesenpai: oh my GOD do i try  
kingofthecourt: WHAT  
kingofthecourt: NO WE CANT NAME IT SKELETOR  
yourultimatesenpai: i TRY ALL THE TIME  
yourultimatesenapi: in this institution  
sugamomma: its my mole and i say we name it skeletor  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: A ND HE PRAYYYS  
yourultimatesenpai: OH YM GOD DO I PRAY  
dadchi: I dare you to name is skeletor  
yourultimatesenpai: I PRAY EVERY SINGLE DAY  
sugamomma: ok  
yourultimatesenpai: FOR THE REVOLUTIONNNNNNN  
yourultimatesenapi: and i say  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: HEYEAYEAYEAYEA HEYEAYEA  
dadchi: He actually dID IT THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN  
literalsunshine: dont you mean mad *dog (;  
dadchi: Eugh  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: I SAID HEY  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WHATS GOING ON

literalsunshine: do you guys dare me to spike a volleyball into oikawas face the next time i see him  
dadchi: No  
sugamomma: no  
wakemeupinside: no  
kingofthecourt: yes  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: thatd be funny but no  
dadchi: Kageyama no  
literalsunshine: lmao i cant believe you guys are making me do this  
dadchi: Were not  
sugamomma: hinata dont  
literalsunshine: hERE I GO  
dadchi: FUCKING DONT  
literalsunshine: holy shit  
sugamomma: what? are you okay?  
literalsunshine: OH SHIT HE FC SFUCKING CHSING ME WHAT TREH CUK DO I DO  
kingofthecourt: AHHAHAHAHAHAHAA FUCKING

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> long story short i wrote this and didnt watnt o add anything else


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> suga makes daichi extremely uncomfortable  
> based off of a REAL EXPERIENCE

sugamomma: gooo tell aunt rhoooodyyh  
sugamomma: goo tell aunt rhoooooooooody  
dadchi: SUGA STOP NO

 **sugamomma** renamed the conversation to **"go tell aunt rhody".**

sugamomma: go tell aunt rhoooody  
sugamomma: that the old grey goose is dead  
dadchi: SUGA I STILL HAVE NIGHTMARES ABOUT THAT MOVIE  
sugamomma: it wasnt even scary  
sugamomma: in fact it wa really bad  
dadchi: IT SCARED ME OK  
sugamomma: y tho  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wtf are you two on about  
sugamomma: this so-called "horror" movie we watched one time  
sugamomma: it wasnt even scary tho  
dadchi: Yes it was  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: oooOOOOOOOoooo what was it abt  
sugamomma: dont really remember  
sugamomma: this girl had problems, and she had this weird thing going on with dolls  
sugamomma: and um her mom/daughter died i think? idk  
sugamomma: and then her new husband was like "ir creepin me out"  
sugamomma: it was weird  
dadchi: It was really creepy  
sugamomma: was not  
dadchi: It fucking was too  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: whats it called  
sugamomma: cant remember  
dadchi: It probably had te word Doll in the title  
sugamomma: GOOOO TELL AUNT RHOOOODYYY  
dadchi: NO  
literalsunshine: OMF I LOVE THAT SONG ITS MY JAM  
literalsunshine: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=v4vxDJKjoBI  
dadchi: EUGH  
sugamomma: 10/10 music taste hinata  
sugamomma: who cares about the twnty pilots  
sugamomma: //jk tho tøp is gr8  
literalsunshine: what abt melanie martinez  
sugamomma: also gr8  
kingofthecourt: do you guys know the song venus ambassador  
literalsunshine: no  
sugamomma: no  
sugamomma: gooo tell aunt rhooooooodg  
sugamomma: go tell aunt rhody that the old grey goose is dead

 **dadchi** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **dadchi** to the coversation.

literalsunshine: suga, would you like to do the honors  
sugamomma: nobody escapes go tell aunt rhody  
dadchi: //cries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its an actual movie!! i unfortunately really dont remember the name  
> it wasnt that good a movie but it provided a few gr8 inside jokes (mostly all of them used) and THIS SONG, go tell aunt rhody (which is stuck in my head rn, thats why i made this chap)  
> if anyone knows the movie PLEASE GIVE ME THE NAME
> 
> damnnnn pinktoria  
> back at it again with forgetting ur to-do list  
> no i am not forgetting it im just ignoring it
> 
> anyway, as usual im open to suggestions! make my to-do list long and hard to manage  
> thanks for reading!!


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> whens the last time i updated  
> 26 years ago  
> oops  
> i made this chapter a teensy bit longer (i think, i didnt check) to compensate
> 
>  
> 
> im not supposed to have long tags i guess so ill put them right here
> 
> what, poor hinata, what is a wocket, thats unrelated bUT, i feel like hinata is donald trump this chapter, doNT WATCH AN ANIME CALLED BOKU, hinata trump, hinata clinton?, no

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to understand this one (and be less offended by what some may consider foul language), i think u need to watch the video first https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cf1a_B7SQnE  
> if youre ok with what some may consider foul language then ur good 2 go  
> sorry if this is annoying i just dont wanna offend anyone ;w;

yourultimatesenpai: dont watch  
yourultimatesenpai: an anime called boku  
yourultimatesenpai: man  
literalsunshine: what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: oh,  
yourultimatesenpai: this shit is so wrong  
dadchi: Not this again  
yourultimatesenpai: in SO MANY FUCKIN levels yo,

 **dadchi** has renamed the conversation to **"Boku".**

yourultimatesenpai: i was talking to one of my white friends  
yourultimatesenpai: and he sent me three videos with the name only labeled "boku"  
literalsunshine: wh a t  
yourultimatesenpai: and i said to this dude  
yourultimatesenpai: "whats this shit?????"  
literalsunshine: w HA T  
yourultimatesenpai: and he just giggled and said  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: "just watch them, and make sure NOBODY IS AROUND WHEN YOURE WATCHING IT!!!!1!11!"  
yourultimatesenpai: and i thought it was some weird porno with some strange shit  
literalsunshine: i can already tell this is going to be an adventure  
yourultimatesenpai: but i watched the first video and i was like  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yooo  
yourultimatesenpai: what the fuck??  
kingofthecourt: hOLD ON A SEC  
kingofthecourt: WAI T WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU  
yourultimatesenpai: then i continued and i was like  
kingofthecourt: NO  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yoooOOOOO  
yourultimatesenpai: theN THEY GOT IN THE MOTHERFUCKING CAR  
kingofthecourt: SOTP STOOP TOPST OSPT  
yourultimatesenpai: and the i said  
ROLLINGTHUNDEr: YOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
literalsunshine: what a story  
yourultimatesenpai: and i couldnt fucking believe what i just saw!!!!  
yourultimatesenpai: it was like tsukishima gave me his porno collection!!  
yourultimatesenpai: shit was so DISTURBING  
gucci: crying abt the tsukki comment  
yourultimatesenpai: yet  
kingofthecourt: YOU NEED TO SOTOP SYOU NTEED TOP STOP  
yourultimatesenpai: YET I COULDNT STOP WATCHING IT  
literalsunshine: ok and what happened next  
yourultimatesenpai: AND THen the video 2 and it was liek......  
yourultimatesenpai: DOING them  
yourultimatesenpai: those niggas

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes Boku  
yourultimatesenpai: yo, thOSE NIGGAS  
yourultimatesenpai: AND THAT GIRL SAW THEM  
yourultimatesenpai: THEN SHE  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!11!1!!  
kingofthecourt: hinata  
kingofthecourt: i need to ask something of you  
yourultimatesenpai: THEN THAT NIGGA TOOK THE DOG TOY AND THEN  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: YOOOOOOOoOOoOoOOOoOooOoOooOoOoO!!!111!1!1!1!1!1!!1!!!!one!!  
literalsunshine: what  
yourultimatesenpai: IT WAS LIKE YOUR BITCH WANTED TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU BUT SHE WANTED TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT  
yourultimatesenpai: AND IT WAS SO FUCKED UP AND CRE EPY  
kingofthecourt: shoot me in the head  
yourultimatesenpai: YOU JUST  
yourultimatesenpai: KEPT WATCHING IT  
yourultimatesenpai: AND THATS WHAT I FUCKIN DID  
literalsunshine: whAT  
literalsunshine: KAGEYA WTF  
TsukishimaKei: "kageya"  
yourultimatesenpai: ANd then i saw video 3,,,  
yourultimatesenpai: THREE NIGGAS  
yourultimatesenpai: THREE!!!1!11!  
kingofthecourt: im serious i mean it  
yourultimatesenpai: IT WAS THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE  
kingofthecourt: shoot me  
TsukishimaKei: seriously tho wtf is going on  
gucci: if tsukkis confused then its something to be confused abt  
yourultiamtesenpai: THREEEeEeEEeEEEEEeeeeee  
yourultimatesenpai: a nd coCO wa s hIS Nma e NIGga,,,,  
kingofthecourt: iM HAVING FLASHBACKS FROM THE TIME I WATCHED BOKu,,, DOTOP SOTPS TOPS  
yourultimatesenpai: CoCo wAS HIS motheRFUCKin nAME  
kingofthecourt: STOP  
yourultimatesenpai: OH MY GOD  
yourultimatesenpai: I AINT GOIN TO HEAVEN NIGGAS  
literalsunshine: wait kageya you actually watched boku  
TsukishimaKei: "kageya"  
yourultimatesenpai: I ALREADY SOLD MY SOUL TO LUCIFEr,,,,,  
yourultimatesenpai: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
yourultimatesenpai: SO I JUST WANNA TELL YOU ALL RIGHT NOW  
literalsunshine: omfg  
yourultimatesenpai: DONT WATCH AN ANIME LABELLED "BOKU"  
yourultimatesenpai: dONT DO IT NigGA  
kingofthecourt: death is immenent and i welcome it with open arms  
literalsunshine: kaGEYA NO I STILL NEED U ON THSI EARTH  
yourultimatesenpai: ITS LIKE SUCCUBUS  
yourultimatesenpai: REMEMBER WHAT IM SAY iN TO YOU Niga gS  
literalsunshine: well i was right that was certainly an adventure

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes Boku  
kingofthecourt: i wish to excape boku  
literalsunshine: *Boku  
literalsunshine: ur not allOWED NOBODY ESCAPES BOKU  
kingofthecourt: ok

sugamomma: QUICK HAS ANYONE HERE EVER TOUCHED A JELLYFISH  
dadchi: Where the fuck have you been  
dadchi: One of the most fucked up memes just happened and you werent here suga wtf  
sugamomma: HAS ANYONE HERE  
sugamomma: EVER TOUCHED  
sugamomma: A JELLYFISH  
dadchi: No  
literalsunshine: i have  
kingofthecourt: wtf why  
literalsunshine: because  
kingofthecourt: you dumbass thats a terrible reason  
sugamomma: OK THANKS BYE

literalsunshine: i think i want to play baseball  
kingofthecourt: never speak to me ever again  
literalsunshine: no not like  
literalsunshine: im not quitting volleyball i just  
literalsunshine: i wanna play A GAME of baseball  
kingofthecourt: why do i feel like wed be terrible at baseball  
TsukishimaKei: because youre volleyball idiots, not baseball idiots  
literalsunshine: good point, good point  
literalsunshine: maybe we could play tennis  
dadchi: No, wed definitely be terrible at tennis  
literalsunshine: badmitten?  
kingofthecourt: thats basically the same thing as tennis  
gucci: no, badmitten is played with a birdie and tennis with a tennisball  
kingofthecourt: yeah and thats like the only difference  
sugamomma: what if we played basket ball  
sugamomma: its not that different from volleyball rigth? except this time were just TRYING to get the ball in the net  
dadchi: Suga im an 95% sure basketball is nowhere close to volleyball  
sugamomma: whats the other 5%  
dadchi: idk  
TsukishimaKei: we could play croquet  
literalsunshine: no  
TsukishimaKei: why  
literalsunshine: croquet is an old people game  
yachi: uh  
yachi: play football  
dadchi: HAHAHAHAHAHA  
yachi: what  
dadchi: Imagine these idiots playing football  
yachi: lmao ur right  
yachi: nm hoes  
literalsunshine: WAIT I THINK I KNOW THE SOLUTION TO OUR PROBLEMS  
kingofthecourt: what

(literalsunshine: KENMA  
puddinghead: what  
imalwaysthisnice: When did HE get in this chat?!  
imalwaysthisnice: eugh, even with him AORUND my good grammar doesnt look right  
literalsunshine: I NEED YOUR HELP  
puddinghead: uh, ok with what  
literalsunshine: WHAT SPORT SHOULD WE PLAY  
imalwaysthisnice: I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU CAME HERE TO ASK SOMETHING THAT STUPID  
imalwaysthisnice: wait did you just way what sport  
puddinghead: um  
puddinghead: volleyball?  
literalsunshine: NO OTHER THAN THAT  
puddinghead: i dont know  
puddinghead: play the legend of zelda: ocarina of time  
literalsunshine: thats not a sport)

kingofthecourt: dumbass tell us your solution  
literalsunshine: it didnt work  
kingofthecourt: bUT WHAT DID YOU JUST DOOOO?? /??? ?/ //?/ //??/ ?//  
literalsunshine: i asked kenma (and sort of kuroo) but they didnt know  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: SOCCER SOCCER SOCCER  
sugamomma: yeahhhh lets play soccer!!  
literalsunshine: i would agree but i dont want a broken shin  
kingofthecourt: how the hell would you break your shin playing soccer  
TsukishimaKei: do you even know how to play soccer  
kingofthecourt: OF COURSE I DO SHUT UP  
literalsunshine: im gonna ask oikawa  
dadchi: Ew

(literalsunshine: oIKAWA-SANNNNN I NEED YOUR HELP  
grand_king: lacrosse  
literalsunshine: OKAY THANKS)

literalsunshine: lacrosse  
kingofthecourt: whats lacrosse  
literalsunshine: never mind  
yourultimatesenpai: i knoW JUST THE SPORT  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ARE YOU THINKING WHAT IM THINKING BRO  
yourultimatesenpai: YEAH BRO  
yourultimatesenpai: HOCKEY??  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: HOCKET  
yourultimatesenpai: maybe hockey can be our always  
dadchi: I SWEAR ITS LIKE THEYRE PSYCHIC  
literalsunshine: i think if we tried to play hockey wed die  
yourultimatesenpai: pshhhhhhh itll be fine  
literalsunshine: [are you sure](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJqsusgquTs)  
yourultimatesenpai: okAY OKAY OKAY NEVER MIND GOOOD  
gucci: how about chess  
dadchi: I dont count chess as a sport  
gucci: its a mind sport  
dadchi: Shut up yamaguchi  
gucci: sorry tsukki  
gucci: wAIT I--  
dadchi: HOLY FUCKKIING  
TsukishimaKei: HAHAHAH OMFG  
kingofthecourt: THIS IS STUPID WHY DONT WE JUST PLAY VOLLEYBALL  
literalsunshine: tosS FOR ME  
kingofthecourt: SHUT UP ASSHOLE, ITS ALREADY A GIVEN BY NOW  
dadchi: So were playing volleyball  
sugamomma: naturally.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> my tags for this chap
> 
> donald trump, japan™, knIFE-WIELDING TENTACLE, the pinnacle, (;, kageya

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another one

literalsunshine: you guys know donald trump  
kingofthecourt: no because thsi is Japan™  
kingofthecourt: and bECAUSE THIS IS JAPAN™ WHY WOULD ANY OF US KNOW WHO THE FUCK THAT IS  
kingofthecourt: OF COURSE WE FUCKING KNOW DONALD TRUMP  
literalsunshine: you dont have to yell i was just asking  
literalsunshine: ok so anyway  
literalsunshine: he has this building thats called trump tower  
sugamomma: omfg really  
literalsunshine: yeah  
literalsunshine: oh youd like it yamaguci  
gucci: no i wouldnt,,,,,, trump is dis g us t, i n,, ,g,,, ,, ,  
literalsunshine: [u sure.jpg](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/75/Trump_Tower_-_Gucci.jpg)  
gucci: gasp,,  
gucci: DAICHI CAN WE TAKE A TRIP TO LAS VEGAS--  
dadchi: I hate you all  
dadchi: I cant wait to graduate  
literalsunshine: anyway this was not my point  
literalsunshine: there was this guy that climbed up trump tower using suction cups  
literalsunshine: and i aspire to be that guy  
sugamomma: i thought you aspired to be the small giant  
literalsunshine: combine them and thats me  
kingofthecourt: HINATA YOURE A DUMBASS  
kingofthecourt: YOURE SUCH A COMPLETE DUMBASS  
kingofthecourt: YOURE A REAL IDIOT  
TsukishimaKei: says the one whose only insult is "dumbass"  
gucci: burn

ROLLINGTHUNDER: I LOVE THROWING THINGS  
literalsunshine: oh

yourultimatesenpai: QUICK EVERYONE WATCH [THIS VIDEO](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61j49MFzUoA) THANKS  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: hinata aspires to be the guy who scaled trump tower and i aspire to be that tentacle  
dadchi: What is wrong with you people  
sugamomma: daichi nothing is wrong with them  
sugamomma: theyre just  
dadchi: Just what suga  
sugamomma: theyre  
sugamomma: theyre just a little strange  
dadchi: "A little"  
dadchi: Wow ok sure, if you say so  
yourultimatesenpai: you dont understand daichi this is the pinnacle of art  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: the pinnacle

yourultimatesenpai has renamed this conversation to "the pinnacle".

dadchi: I want to leave this chat right now but if i do hinata will just add me and say  
dadchi: HAHAHAHAH DAICH (; (; (: 9 :(/ m:( : N(: 9: (: 9: 9: 9 (; 9; UR , ,, , NO1 ESCPAPAPP E E SEPS THE PINNACLE (; (; (; (; HAHAHAH AH AH HA HAH AHH AH HA H AHA HH A  
literalsunshine: no  
literalsunshine: maybe

literalsunshine: petition to rename kageya penelope  
kingofthecourt: WHY PENELOPE  
literalsunshine: idk just bc  
literalsunshine: i think its a nice name anyway  
kingofthecourt: then why didnt we name sugas mole that  
sugamomma: its skeletor and youre never changing that kageyama  
literalsunshine: YEAH KAGEYA  
TsukishimaKei: OKAY HINATA IS THERE A SPECIFIC REASON YOURE CALLING KAGEYAMA "KAGEYA" OR  
literalsunshine: well no but???????????  
literalsunshine: what is ur PROBLEM stingyshima  
TsukishimaKei: ?/?!/1/1/1//!/!? MMGGHH


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> he just wants his bike give him his bike

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i tried to get this chapter up yesterday but ao3 was being weird so im trying again today

literalsunshine: ive never actually been to a science fair  
kingofthecourt: that is a legit problem that we need to fix  
literalsunshine: no i mean  
literalsunshine: im just saying  
kingofthecourt: no im serious  
kingofthecourt: daichi can we have a science fair  
dadchi: Of course  
dadchi: Suga call sensei and coach  
sugamomma: i gotchu daichi  
literalsunshine: wiat wiayt wia ti wais wiat wsia wtiws  
literalsunshine: thats so unnecessary  
literalsunshine: ill just add them to the chat  
wakemeupinside: okaY  
wakemeupinside: OKAY  
wakemeupinside: OKAY I CAN ACCEPT YOU HAVING KENMA ADDED  
wakemeupinside: I CAN ACCEPT YOU HAVING OIKAWA ADDED  
wakemeupinside: BUT WHY  
wakemeupinside: WHY THE HELL  
wakemeupinside: DID YOU ADD SENSEI AND COACH ON SKYPE  
literalsunshine: ok but,,, why not?  
literalsunshine: i have yachi and kiyoko added  
yachi: are you trying to compare me to coach and sensei  
literalsunshine: kind of  
literalsunshine: i think its different because you and kiyoko are our managers  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: kiyoko is great  
yourultimatesenpai: shes so great  
yachi: yeah i guess

 **literalsunshine** added **takeda** and **keishin_ukai** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: now they will not escape  
takeda: oh what  
takeda: OH  
takeda: okay okay never mind I was confused for a second  
keishin_ukai: grosssss children  
keishin_ukai: wait am i allowed to say that around the children  
literalsunshine: IM NOT A CHILDREN!11!1!1!!!1!!1!!!!!1!  
keishin_ukai: yes you are  
kingofthecourt: you know who i dont like  
kingofthecourt: oikawa  
literalsunshine: kageyama now is not hte time for this  
sugamomma: NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR ANY OF THIS WE NEED TO PLAN A SCIENCE FAIR  
sugamomma: SENSEI COACH UKAIIIIIII WE NEED YOUR HELP  
takeda: for a science fair?  
keishin_ukai: sounds stupid  
keishin_ukai: i mean,  
keishin_ukai: SOUNDS LIKE SO MUCH FUN!!!!  
keishin_ukai: or whatever the kids would say  
literalsunshine: im not a children coach ):  
keishin_ukai: whatever  
keishin_ukai: anyway  
keishin_ukai: were not doing a science fair its dumb  
takeda: why do you think that?  
keishin_ukai: because... i dont know it just is  
kingofthecourt: you know who else i dont like  
literalsunshine: KAGEYAMA THIS ISNT THE TIME.  
kingofthecourt: ushijima  
literalsunshine: KA A GE Y A  
keishin_ukai: whos that?  
literalsunshine: DONT  
literalsunshine: COACH DONT GET HIM STARTED  
literalsunshine: JUST  
literalsunshine: PLAN THAT SCIENCE FAIR  
takeda: itll be fun!  
keishin_ukai: okay okay okay fine  
keishin_ukai: if were doing it, we might as well do it the best we can  
keishin_ukai: SENSEI, WERE GOING OUT  
literalsunshine: [SPITS OUT DRINK]  
dadchi: I KNEW IT  
sugamomma: hsahahaHAHHHAHAHA OMFG  
keishin_ukai: FUCK FUCKFUCIKFUCKFUICKJ UFKC UFK CUFKJC UFKC UFKCJ I  
keishin_ukai: PROBABLY SHOUDLDNT AHVE SAID FUCKI THSIN MANY TIMES UBT OH MY GFUCKING GOD  
keishin_ukai: I MEANT WERE GOING ALL OUT  
keishin_ukai: GOING ALL OUT  
keishin_ukai: THATS WHAt i meant  
keishin_ukia: i swear  
literalsunshine: im fuckign cryig gng im liteRALLY SOBBIGN  
keishin_ukai: SAWAMURA WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU KNEW IT  
dadchi: //Shrugs  
keishin_ukai: um  
keishin_ukai: sensei are you alive  
takeda: no  
sugamomma: i think you broke sensei, coach ukai  
keishin_ukai: no shit  
kingofthecourt: you know who else i dont like  
takeda: who  
literalsunshine: STO P  
kingofthecourt: bokuto  
literalsunshine: why  
literalsunshine: bokutos great  
literalsunshine: i like his knee pads

(HOOTIMMAOWL: AKAASHI I GOT THE FEELING THAT SOMEONE JUST COMPLIMENTED ME  
keiji: youre probably just imagining it  
HOOTIMMAOWL: ): youre just jealous)

gucci: wow same  
gucci: where dOES HE GET THEM I WANT KNEE PADS LIKE THAT  
literalsunshine: hey do you guys think pigeons have feelings  
keishin_ukai: sensei are you broken  
takeda: mhm  
keishin_Ukai: shit  
kingofthecourt: HEY YOU KNOW WHO I HATE  
kingofthecourt: HINATA  
kingofthecourt: SHUT UP ABOUT THE PIGEONS ALREADY I FUCKIGN  
takeda: this is a very intense chat and I am scared  
yachi: dont worry about it sensei, you get used to it

keishin_ukai: you meddling kids  
yourultimatesenpai: what us  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we are perfect angels who did not do anything  
yourultimatesenpai: spare us please  
keishin_ukai: you TROUBLEMAKERS  
yachi: what did they do  
keishin_ukai: THEY STOLE MY BIKE  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we would never do such a thing we are perfect angels  
yourultimatesenpai: yes whoever stole coach's bike should have to clean the gym for a month  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: maybe not that far  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: maybe just like a week or something  
dadchi: Just give him back his bike


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> on our special 20th chapter which i almost forgot about, oikawa makes another guest appearance [studio audience laughter] to help our poor, poor kageyama with his gay troubles
> 
> now since i know ill probably forget about our special 30th chapter, which will probably happen, START GIVING ME IDEAS  
> i want chapter 30 to be long (: (:  
> it adds to the specialness
> 
>  
> 
> tags  
> who dunnit, who doesnt love a who dunnit, i know daichi does, tobio-chan~~~~~~~~~, ok im, aaaaaa, wow

**kingofthecourt** renamed the conversation to **"rip kageyama tobio".**

kingofthecourt: yes ok thats it my life is over  
kingofthecourt: goodbye team im dead from now on  
kingofthecourt: im going to move and change my name and dye my hair and start playing basketball or some shit  
kingofthecourt: this is the end of my life  
literalsunshine: lmfao whats ur problem  
kingofthecourt: i dont want to talk about it  
kingofthecourt: just know now that my name is pablo tobio and i have brown hair and i play basketball and i live in america ok bye

 **kingofthecourt** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **kingofthecourt** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: WEVE BEEN OVER THIS SO MANY TIMES NOW WHY CANT ANY OF YOU LEARN THAT NOBODY ESCAPES THIS GODDAMN CHAT  
literalsunshine: i will say it for your benefit, anyway.  
literalsunshine: nobody escapes rip kageyama tobio  
literalsunshine: anyway  
literalsunshine: i dont think pablo tobio is a name you can use because pablo isnt a last name  
kingofthecourt: yeah well  
kingofthecourt: im not going to let anyone call me by my first name so theyll just have to call me pablo from now on  
literalsunshine: to~bi~o~  
kingofthecourt: NO  
literalsunshine: tobio-chan  
kingofthecourt: DO NOT  
keishin_ukai: LMFAO  
literalsunshine: tobio-chan ill teach you how to serve good  
kingofthecourt: STOP IM HAVING WAR FLASHBACks from,,, , , ,kitagawa.. . .. .. , ,. ,,. , ,. ., ,daiichi, , ., ., .. . .,,. , ., ,,, , sotp

(literalsunshine: quick i need you to distract kageyama  
grand_kind: haha leave it to me chibi-chan!)

 **literalsunshine** added **grand_king** to the conversation.

grand_king: ahhh tobio-chan!! (╯◕ω◕)╯  
kingofthecourt: NO SOTP SNTOSPS OTP NO  
grand_king: flashbacks from kitagawa daiichi??? i know what to do! (≧ω≦)  
grand_king: knock knock!  
kingofthecourt: no  
grand_king: KNOCK KNOCK!  
kingofthecourt: WHOS THERE  
grand_king: no one!  
grand_king: get it?? (^▽^)  
grand_king: 'cause when you served nobody was there  
grand_king: funny right?  
grand_king: its a totally original joke i made up all by myself because i am so intelligent and also pretty  
kingofthecourt: THATS  
kingofthecourt: THATS NOT EVEN FUNNY  
literalsunshine: it was mean but you gotta admit kageyama  
literalsunshine: it was kinda funny.......... . ... . . ... . . .  
keishin_ukai: it WAS kinda funny  
takeda: ukai!!  
yachi: coach pls  
TsukishimaKei: stolen meme  
TsukishimaKei: meme police, arrest this man  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: OIKAWA TOORU YOU ARE UNDER ARREST FOR MEME THEFT  
grand_king: YEAH I STOLE THAT MEME  
grand_king: AND I WOULD HAVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH IT, TOO, IF IT WERENT FOR THAT MEDDLING TEAM  
grand_king: AND THEIR LITTLE DECOY TOO  
literalsunshine: lmao  
kingofthecourt: heY WAIT I SEE WHATS GOING ON HERE  
kingofthecourt: WHATEVER DUMBASS IM MOVING TO AMERICA AND DYING MY HAIR BROWN AND CHANGING MY NAME TO PABLO TOBIO AND LEARNING TO PLAY BASKETBALL  
grand_king: brown? ಠ_ಠ  
dadchi: Wait, pablo tobio?  
yourultimatesenpai: basketball?  
sugamomma: wait kageyama, why is your life over?  
kingofthecourt: because  
kingofthecourt: at the store today a girl from our school recognized me  
literalsunshine: ok  
kingofthecourt: she said she thought i was really cool and that we should DATE  
literalsunshine: right  
kingofthecourt: SHE SAID I DIDNT HAVE TO ANSWER RIGHT THEN AND SHE LEFT BUT  
literalsunshine: yes  
kingofthecourt: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
literalsunshine: yes ok  
literalsunshine: uh, is that all kageyama??  
kingofthecourt: yeahhh... ,, ., .,.,. ,., ,., ., ,., . ., .,, .,  
grand_king: normally i would make fun of you tobio-chan but  
grand_king: wtf why is your life over?  
grand_king: you should be glad you finally got asked out haha!  
dadchi: //SPITS OUT DRINK  
sugamomma: wait did they forget to tell anyone  
wakemeupinside: maybe they were just embarrassed?  
grand_king: what?  
literalsunshine: oh shit  
literalsunshine: kAGEYAMA WE FORGOT TO TELL ANYONE  
kingofthecourt: like hell i would tell anyone if i didnt have to thats too embarrassing  
wakemeupinside: or that, that too  
grand_king: WHAT  
literalsunshine: kageyama is dATING ME  
literalsunshine: WANNA FITE ABOUT IT???  
kingofthecourt: oh my god  
grand_king: hahaha  
grand_king: i knew something was going on there but i couldnt put my finger on it! (´ ▽ ` )ﾉ  
kingofthecourt: anyway MY LIFE IS OVER BECAUSE 1. SHE???? RECOGNIZED? ? ??? ? / ??? ??? ME??? /!? !/1/ ?!? ?! ?!? ?!?/ 1? /!/ ?!/ / ?! ?!?  
kingofthecourt: AND 2. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO TELL HER?????? i cant just outright tell her about how gay i am  
kingofthecourt: (answer: pretty gay)  
grand_king: i know just how to help, tobio-chan! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧  
literalsunshine: you do?  
dadchi: ... You do????  
kingofthecourt: YOU DOO???/ ?? // ? ?  
grand_king: of course i do!  
literalsunshine: youre gay oikawa???  
grand_king: im pan  
dadchi: Okay when did this turn into sexuality anonymous

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** renamed the conversation to **"sexuality anonymous".**

dadchi: Stop  
  
 **grand_king** renamed the conversation to **"tobio-chan defense squad".**

kingofthecourt: no

 **literalsunshine** renamed the conversation to **"kageyama defense squad".**

kingofthecourt: better, i guess  
grand_king: anyway  
grand_king: just tell her you dont like her that way  
grand_king: even if you are just starting to gain fans, tobio-chan~  
grand_king: youre so gay (=ω=;)  
grand_king: it would be true even if you were straight!!  
sugamomma: oikawa is right, for once  
grand_king: rude  
sugamomma: i hate to start Mom Preaching but  
sugamomma: i think you should tell her that you dont really even know her  
sugamomma: and that youre dating someone else already  
literalsunshine: AND IF SHE DOESNT LISTEN THE FIRST TIME ILL GIVE HER WHAT FOR  
literalsunshine: ILL COME UP TO HER AND BE ALL LIKE GWAAH AND BWAAH  
literalsunshine: AND SHE WONT MESS WITH US AGAIN  
kingofthecourt: oh my god i hate all of you  
literalsunshine: i think that means "thank u but ur all embarrassing"  
sugamomma: 100%  
grand_king: good luck tobio-chan!  
grand_king: am i done being a distraction chibi-chan?  
literalsunshine: yeah! thanks oikawa!!  
grand_king: anytime~

 **grand_king** left the conversation.

kingofthecourt: stop misinterpreting my words, i meant what i said and i said what i meant  
kingofthecourt: i hate you all  
sugamomma: aww we love you too kageyama!!  
dadchi: Good luck with that girl  
kingofthecourt: oh my god

literalsinshine: OKAY WHICH ONE OF YOU STOLE MY PHONE WHEN I WASNT LOOKING ANY CHANGED MY NAME  
dadchi: Omg  
sugamomma: well im not gonna say its inaccurate  
literalsinshine: WHO DID THIS  
literalsinshine: IM NOT MAD, I JUST WANNA KNOW  
yourultimatesenpai: not us  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we are perfect angels who did not do anything  
yourultimatesenpai: spare us please  
keishin_ukai: i cant imagine why but i just got a weird feeling of deja-vu  
literalsinshine: GWAAAAAAHHHHH  
literalsinshine: IT WAS YOU TWO WASNT IT? IT HAD TO HAVE BEEN WHO ELSE WOULD DO THIS  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we would never do such a thing we are perfect angels  
yourultimatesenapai: anyway it wasnt us this time, swear on suga's love for daichi  
sugamomma: st o p  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we would have done something more creative like  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: like  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: well i cant think of anything right now but just know that it would be more creative than "sinshine"  
literalsinshine: what?  
literalsinshine: if it wasnt you, then who did it?  
wakemeupinside: you know who has been suspiciously quiet for a while  
literalsinshine: you?  
wakemeupinside: wELL yes but  
wakemeupinside: i didnt do it i swear  
literalsinshine: kAGEYAMA  
kingofthecourt: you know me, im not THAT clever  
literalsinshine: ... tsukishima?  
TsukishimaKei: i do not want to touch your phone, what if i catch the shortness from you  
literalsinshine: ok not him  
literalsinshine: then who did?  
literalsinshine: ok hold on i need to change my name back this is not ok  
dadchi: Hold on  
sugamomma: what  
dadchi: This is  
dadchi: OH MY GOD  
dadchi: THIS IS A PROPER WHODUNNIT  
sugamomma: oh no  
wakemeupinside: oh no  
yourultimatesenpai: oh no  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: oh no  
literalsunshine: oh no  
literalsunshine: oh no what  
literalsunshine: why oh no  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ill explain  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: last year... daicho kinda  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ok well let me just  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i cant im gonna starti fuckign laguhting my ass off tanaka u do it  
yourultimatesenpai: OKAY LET ME ELSPLAIN  
yourultimatesenpai: LAST YEAR THERE WAS THIS GUAY  
yourultiamtesenpai: Okzya sotRRY i FUCKING CAN,,,t  
sugamomma: oh my god ill do it  
sugamomma: last year there was this guy  
sugamomma: and he left his shoes in the locker room  
sugamomma: and the next day they werent there anymore  
sugamomma: and daichi kinda.....  
sugamomma: pff  
sugamomma: oKAY IM SORRY FORGIVE ME FUR MY SINS,,s, AHAHA  
wakemeupinside: HE IS A MYSTERY STORY FANATIC SO OF COURSE HE HOPS ON THE CASE IM SOBBIGN  
wakemeupinside: AND HE DIDNT EVEN FIND THE GUYS SHEOS  
literalsunshine: im,,,,, ,, ,  
literalsunshine: I CANT  
literalsunshine: DAICHI????? A MYSTERY SOTRY FANATIC> ?? ? ?  
literalsunshine: YEP THATS IT HIS NAME IS NANCY DREW FROM NOW ON  
dadchi: YES  
literalsunshine: AHAHAHAHA OMFGGMGFMGF,G,F,G, , HOLY SHIT  
gucci: it was me i did it im sorry hinata i cannot let this continue any longer  
literalsunshine: ok yeah thanks for admitting it yamaguchi buT YOURE MISSING MY NEW POINT  
literalsunshine: DAICHI IS A MYSTERY STORY FANATIC  
gucci: youre not mad at me?  
literalsunshine: [ahem]  
literalsunshine: [10/1/2016 5:00:57 PM] literalsinshine: IM NOT MAD, I JUST WANNA KNOW  
gucci: in that case..............  
gucci: daichi omg


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> blissfully oblivious volleydorks

literalsunshine: heLLO friends so  
literalsunshine: um  
literalsunshine: kageyama im stealing your idea  
literalsunshine: my name is pablo shouyou and i have black hair and i live in australia with the hot swim guy and i swim (with the hot swim guy, probably)  
kingofthecourt: dont call anyone hot but me  
kingofthecourt: or do its not like i care  
dadchi: I dont know what to this  
dadchi: Is that hilarious because hes a literal tsundere or is it weird because tmi  
TsukishimaKei: both.  
literalsunshine: ha ha ha ha ha,ha,h,a ,ha, ha,h ,a,ah, yes let us forget all of pablo shouyous problems ha ha,h ah, ah,a  
kingofthecourt: whats your problem then, pablo shouyou  
keishin_ukai: you know what i think is dumb  
literalsunshine: YOU TOO, COACH  
literalsunshine: FIRST KAGS AND NOW YOU  
literalsunshine: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU THIS IS NOT THE TIME  
keishin_ukai: arranged marriages  
literalsunshine: something tells me youre not going to shut up  
yachi: hinata you cant say that to the coach  
literalsunshine: well i didnt say it TO him  
literalsunshine: just kinda at him  
keishin_ukai: because like  
literalsunshine: look hes not even paying attention anyway  
keishin_ukai: your parents are all like  
keishin_ukai: "when are you gonna find a nice young lady to settle down with little jimmy"  
literalsunshine: why little jimmy what the hell  
takeda: coACH IS THIS REALLY APPROPRIATE TO TALK ABOUT IN FRONT OF THE TEAM  
keishin_ukai: and poor, poor little jimmy just kinda looks at them and hes like "oh my god how many times have i told you im bi"  
takeda: COACH  
dadchi: Sensei its fine have you not noticed how gay we all are  
yachi: like literally. im pretty sure even tanakas sister is gay.  
yourultimatesenpai: probably idk  
keishin_ukai: and jimmys parents go "its just a phase jimmy, youre not actually bi youre just saying that so you dont have to meet all these nice girls we contact for you."  
literalsunshine: this entire chat is a mess i regret my life decisions  
keishin_ukai: and jimmy goes "why cant you just let me live my own life"  
takeda: COACH UKAI I THINK THAT IS ENOUGH  
keishin_ukai: ok fine whatever  
literalsunshine: can we talk about my problems now  
kingofthecourt: no  
kingofthecourt: gosh so ANYWAY  
dadchi: Did kageyama just say gosh  
dadchi: Thats like,,,, a suga thing to say  
sugamomma: when have i ever said gosh  
dadchi: Well ive never heard you say it but you seem like youd say it and then glance around to make sure nobody heard  
sugamomma: WHAT  
sugamomma: IVE NEVER DONTE THAT IN MY LIFE  
dadchi: Something tells me that you have  
kingofthecourt: coach i think maybe you should just get a partner and shove them in your parents face  
TsukishimaKei: says the one who was embarrassed to tell a girl he didnt know that he was gay  
kingofthecourt: uh, ahahahhahahaha, isnt that funny yes haha i totally did that its funny that i said that just now,,, im so glad i told her haha  
literalsunshine: you didnt tell her did you  
kingofthecourt: no  
kingofthecourt: SO ANYWAY  
kingofthecourt: even if your parents arent accepting of you, it doesnt matter right?  
kingofthecourt: your lgbtq+ team is here for you  
kingofthecourt: were basically your family now so its ok  
takeda: ok even i am surprised  
takeda: when did kageyama become so inspirational  
keishin_ukai: ok wOAH WOAH WOAh i need a sec please thansk bye  
dadchi: DAMN IT STOP BREAKING OUR ADULTS  
dadchi: FIRST TAKEDA-SENSEI AND THEN COACH UKAI WHOS NEXT  
dadchi: KIYOKO AND YACHI?  
yachi: please no  
literalsunshine: CAN WE TALK ABOUT MY PROBLEM NOW  
sugamomma: NO HINATA WERE BUSY RN MAYBE IN A SEC  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: coach who do you think youll take as a partner  
yourultimatesenpai: I HAVE AN IDEA WHAT IF ONE OF US PRETEND TO BE YOUR PARTNER TO GET YOUR PARENTS OFF YOUR BACK  
ROLLINGTHUDNER: YES THATS A GREAT IDEA  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i would be the stunning yumiko, a transgirl from the bahamas  
dadchi: OKAY ONE NO THATS A TERRIBLE IDEA  
dadchi: TWO WHAT KIND OF GIRL FROM THE BAHAMAS HAS A NAME LIKE AIKO?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you dont like the name yumiko?  
dadchi: Oh my god  
yourultimatesenpai: i would be the alluring yurumaru, a gay man from america!  
dadchi: RRARHRHAKJJWERJKRLKJRLTJLR I DO NT ST SHINMK YOU TOW UNDERTSTNAD MY PAIN  
sugamomma: daichi suppress the urge to stab them  
dadchi: IM TRYUING  
keishin_ukai: i dont think thats a good idea  
takeda: HAHAHA YES NEITHER DO I  
yourultimatesenpai: of course it is! who wouldnt want to be with the alluring kurai  
dadchi: THATS A DIFFERNET NAME  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you guys are making the stunning kurami sad  
dadchi: WHAT THE HELL  
literalsunshine: lets talk about MY PROBLEMS  
dadchi: OKAY  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: nooooooo  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what if i were toshiba, a beautiful princess from france or italy or somewhere like that!  
dadchi: OKAY THATS A COMPANY NAME WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS  
keishin_ukai: GUYS GUYS ITS OKAY YOU CAN SHUT UP NOW  
yourultimatesenpai: YES SIR COACH SIR  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: YES SIR COACH SIR  
keishin_ukai: listen, thanks for wanting to help but theres nothing to be done. i think my parents will notice that youre highschoolers.  
yourultimatesenpai: NOT IF WE DO OUR BEST TO REPLICATE OUR NEW IDENTITIES, COACH SIR  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WELL MAKE IT AS REALISTIC AS POSSIBLE SIR COACH SIR  
keishin_ukai: stop calling me that  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: YES SIR COACH SIR  
keishin_ukai: look, i just dont have the right kind of person in my life, nobody that i actually love  
keishin_ukai: and no offense, but i think it would be weird to show up at work with tanaka escorting me  
yourultimatesenpai: weird how  
keishin_ukai: stop  
takeda: UM UH  
takeda: SIR COACH SIR PERMISSION TO SPEAK  
dadchi: Why is everyone treating him like hes some kind of army general  
keishin_ukai: okay wow look  
keishin_ukai: i appreciate that youre trying to help sensei but i think its a really bad idea for you to disguise as my trans boyfriend or whatever  
takeda: UM THAT  
takeda: THAT WASNT  
takeda: BUT  
keishin_ukai: thanks anyway but no  
literalsunshine: [forgets problems for three seconds to help the goddamn oblivious idiots in love]  
TsukishimaKei: why does that sound so ironic.  
TsukishimaKei: "why" does that sound so ironic.  
TsukishimaKei: i wonder "why"  
TsukishimaKei: "WHY"  
literalsunshine: idk  
literalsunshine: a nyway  
literalsunshine: TAKEDA-SENSEI JUST FUCKING SAY SOMETHING TO HIM ALREADY  
literalsunshine: COACH UKAI CAN YOU JUST FUCKING LISTEN TO YOUR HEART INSTEAD OF YOUR HEAD FOR A SECOND JFC  
TsukishimaKei: your heart does not provide thoughts as the brain does, shrimpy  
TsukishimaKei: learn your vital organs  
literalsunshine: the brain is a muscle  
TsukishimaKei: you really are an idiot  
TsukishimaKei: its just called that, stupid  
takeda: HINATA HINATA I CANT WHAT IF I MESS UP WHAT IF HE DOESNT THNK THE SAME WHAT IF SOEMOTHITNG STUPID HAVPPENS AND I MASS UP WAHT IF I  
takeda: DO SOMETHING STUPID AND IM THE ONE WHO MESSES IT UP WHAT IF  
literalsunshine: stop  
takeda: OKAY  
kingofthecourt: i cant believe were getting out coach and sensei together  
literalsunshine: look sensei just  
literalsunshine: just kinda  
literalsunshine: tell him  
kingofthecourt: thats what i did  
sugamomma: no its not  
kingofthecourt: be quiet you  
takeda: YEAH OKAY I CAN DO IT  
literalsunshine: maybe take caps lock off first  
takeda: yes ok  
takeda: coach ukai  
takeda: keishin  
keishin_ukai: uhhhhh? wait what do they mean  
takeda: just  
takeda: please just listen to me for a minute  
keishin_ukai: okay?  
takeda: uh  
takeda: keishin i really really like you okay  
takeda: i like you so much it makes me feel like im a highschooler again  
takeda: a highschool girl, for that fact  
takeda: and uh  
takeda: it feels so wrong  
takeda: a teacher shouldnt feel this way towards a coach like you  
keishin_ukai: sensei  
takeda: no keishin please just listen  
takeda: and i know that you dont feel the same way as me so im sorry, i guess  
takeda: i really cant help how i feel about you  
keishin_ukai: TAKEDA  
takeda: and im really  
takeda: i dont know  
takeda: im scared i guess  
takeda: i might lose my job  
keishin_ukai: TAKEDA-SENSEI JUST LISTEN  
takeda: but i dont really care about that  
takeda: well i guess i do  
takeda: i dont know i just really  
takeda: i love you keishin

(literalsunshine: this is gettin intense jfc im,,,  
gucci: why did you do this in The Incident™ chat  
literalsunshine: where else am i supposed to do it)

keishin_ukai: ittetsu uh  
keishin_ukai: i love you too  
keishin_ukai: i didnt think you felt like that about me and i guess  
keishin_ukai: i guess i just wanted to close you off because i was scared of losing you  
takeda: never! never you could never lose me  
takeda: no matter how hard you try you cant get rid of me!!! heheh  
takeda: sorry that probably sounded weird  
keishin_ukai: no no! its fine  
keishin_ukai: listen i just  
keishin_ukai: i love you too and i didnt know how to deal with it  
TsukishimaKei: im getting diabetes.  
takeda: oH MY FUCKING GOD I FUCKING FORGOT WE WERE IN THE UCXKING CHAT UFKC OH GOD OH GOD GOH GOD  
dadchi: Why™  
dadchi: Why™ does this chat always turn into goddamn Karasuno Feelings Time™  
literalsunshine: this is the way volleyball jesus intended it to be  
takeda: IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING  
literalsunshine: its ok sensei youd be surprised how often this happens  
literalsunshine: and i dont know why but i feel like its gonna happen a lot more in the future  
keishin_ukai: YEP THATS IT IM CHANGING MY NAME TO PABLO KEISHIN AND IM REDYING MY HAIR AND IM MOVING TO ANTARTICA TO DO SCUBA DIVING BYE  
takeda: IM SO SORRY SO SO SORRY  
dadchi: STOP BREAKING THEM JUST  
dadchi: JUST STOP

kingofthecourt: its been an hour and i completely forgot that hinata had some problem  
wakemeupinside: oh my god  
yachi: IM SOBBIGN HINATA ARE YOU OK  
literalsunshine: mine seems kinda trivial now  
kingofthecourt: its fine dumbass just say it  
literalsunshine: i stole a youtube diamond play button  
kingofthecourt: HINATA WHT THA RFUK

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> question, would any of you like to see a crossover between fandoms for the 30th chapter? just an idea. if so, what fandom(s)?


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> EXTREMELY SHORT CHAPTER mainly for the purpose of introducing ennoshita and tanaka being a gay

literalsunshine: hey yachi did you know that if you pronounce the a in your nane differently and if you pronounce the ch like ck then youre yacki and that makes you a yack  
kingofthecourt: are we all forgetting that hINATA STOLE A FUCKING DIAMOND PLAY BUTTON  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you know who tanakas gay for  
yachi: its only 11 am and this chat is already a mess  
yourultimatesenpai: noya no  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ill give you a hint his name starts with e  
yourultimatesenpai: noya you dont have to do this just put the gun down  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you cqnt meme your way out of this one tanaka  
yourultimatesenpai: yes i can  
yourultimatesenpai: here come dat boi  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: o shIT WADDUP  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: hint #2 it starts with en  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: hit #3 its ennoshita  
dadchi: Speaking of ennoshita hinata why didnt you ever add him to the chat?  
literalsunshine: um, he said he would not like to be involved in our meme activities and since he is Mom In Training i have to listen to what he says so  
wakemeupinside: ok be real, the author probably hust forgot his name.  
literalsunshine: HA true  
yourultimatesenpai: were not adding ennoshita to the chat anyway  
literalsunshine: ennoshita im sorry i have to do this, but its for the gay

 **literalsunshine** added **bleach** to the conversation.

bleach: drink me  
literalsunshine: OOPS WRING PERSON

 **bleach** left the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: who was that  
literalsunshine: hahah ha ha ahah ha ah  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wh

 **literalsunshine** added **ennoSHITa** to the conversation.

ennoSHITa: hinata we had an agreement  
literalsunshine: im sorry mom #2 but i did it for the memes  
kingofthecourt: HANG ON A SEC IM SOBBIGN @ ENOOSHITAS NAME  
ennoSHITa: i tend to exclaim "SHIT" a lot and SOMEONE thought it would be funny to change my name  
yourultimatesenpai: lmao  
ennoSHITa: ya lil shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im still gatherig suggestions for the 30th chapter  
> not fandoms anymore, but just any ideas you have!! thanks for readig!!


	23. Chapter 23

ennoSHITa: drinkig game  
ennoSHITa: drink every time a meme haappens  
dadchi: ENNOSHITA NO WELL ALL DIE


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> heres another bullshit chapter here you go  
> still accepting suggestions for chap 30  
> ALSO if you wanna suggest other teams/characters you wanna see, go ahead and comment

ROLLINGTHUNDER: el diachi  
dadchi: Wh  
literalsunshine: el diachi  
literalsunshine: lo sentimos, el diachi, pero el idioma español ha tomado posesión de mi alma  
dadchi: I dont speak spanish hinata  
literalsunshine: por supuesto usted habla español!  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: sabemos que puedes hacerlo  
dadchi: Stop  
sugamomma: no te metas con nuestros hijos daichi  
dadchi: You too suga?  
dadchi: I thought we had something special  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: No somos extraños de amor  
Sabes las reglas, y yo también  
Una devoción es que penso de  
No recibires eso de otros hombres  
Sólo quiero decir como siento  
Sabes tú debes comprender

Nunca voy abandonarte  
Nunca voy a fallarte  
Nunca voy a correr o desertarte  
Nunca voy hacerte llorar  
Nunca voy decir adios  
Nunca voy a mentir o ofenderte

Nos conocimos mucho tiempo  
Eres muy tímido como para hablar de tu corazón  
Dentro sabemos que ha pasado  
Sabemos el juego y jugamos  
Y si tú preguntas como siento  
No dime que tú eres ciego.

Nunca voy abandonarte  
Nunca voy a fallarte  
Nunca voy a correr o desertarte  
Nunca voy hacerte llorar  
Nunca voy decir adios  
Nunca voy a mentir o ofenderte

Nunca voy abandonarte  
Nunca voy a fallarte  
Nunca voy a correr o desertarte  
Nunca voy hacerte llorar  
Nunca voy decir adios  
Nunca voy a mentir o ofenderte

(Oh, abandonar, oh, abandonar)  
Nunca voy aban, nunca voy aban  
(Abandonar)  
Nunca voy aban, nunca voy aban  
(Abandonar)

Nos conocimos mucho tiempo  
Eres muy tímido como para hablar de tu corazón  
Dentro sabemos que ha pasado  
Sabemos el juego y jugamos  
Sólo quiero decir como siento  
Sabes tú debes comprender

Nunca voy abandonarte  
Nunca voy a fallarte  
Nunca voy a correr o desertarte  
Nunca voy hacerte llorar  
Nunca voy decir adios  
Nunca voy a mentir o ofenderte

Nunca voy abandonarte  
Nunca voy a fallarte  
Nunca voy a correr o desertarte  
Nunca voy hacerte llorar  
Nunca voy decir adios  
Nunca voy a mentir o ofenderte

Nunca voy abandonarte  
Nunca voy a fallarte  
Nunca voy a correr o desertarte  
Nunca voy hacerte llorar  
Nunca voy decir adios  
Nunca voy a mentir o ofenderte  
yourultimatesenpai: NO, QUÈ CARAJO, POR QUÈ NOYA  
yourultimatesenpai: NO  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: jajajajaja  
dadchi: I hate all of you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edit: hi i just wanted to show you the translation to the rickroll  
> thanks google translate
> 
>  
> 
> We are not strangers love  
> You know the rules, and I also  
> A devotion is thought of  
> Recibires not that other men  
> I just want to say how I feel  
> You know you must understand
> 
> I'll never leave you  
> I will never let you down  
> I'll never run or desertarte  
> I'll never make you mourn  
> I'll never say goodbye  
> I will never lie or offend
> 
> We met a long time  
> You're too shy to talk about your heart  
> Within we know what happened  
> We know the game and we played  
> And if you ask how I feel  
> Do not tell me you're blind.
> 
> I'll never leave you  
> I will never let you down  
> I'll never run or desertarte  
> I'll never make you mourn  
> I'll never say goodbye  
> I will never lie or offend
> 
> I'll never leave you  
> I will never let you down  
> I'll never run or desertarte  
> I'll never make you mourn  
> I'll never say goodbye  
> I will never lie or offend
> 
> (Oh, leave, oh, leave)  
> I'll never aban, I'll never aban  
> (Leave)  
> I'll never aban, I'll never aban  
> (Leave)
> 
> We met a long time  
> You're too shy to talk about your heart  
> Within we know what happened  
> We know the game and we played  
> I just want to say how I feel  
> You know you must understand
> 
> I'll never leave you  
> I will never let you down  
> I'll never run or desertarte  
> I'll never make you mourn  
> I'll never say goodbye  
> I will never lie or offend
> 
> I'll never leave you  
> I will never let you down  
> I'll never run or desertarte  
> I'll never make you mourn  
> I'll never say goodbye  
> I will never lie or offend
> 
> I'll never leave you  
> I will never let you down  
> I'll never run or desertarte  
> I'll never make you mourn  
> I'll never say goodbye  
> I will never lie or offend


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> its short but thats ok  
> im just tire dof writing tonight and dont feel like writing anymore  
> idk  
> here u go

**yourultimatesenpai** renamed the conversation to **"#MEMEMIXTAPE21K6".**

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** sent a file: **DOOOOO DOO DOO DOOOOOO DOOOO.mp4**

dadchi: What the hell is that  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: our mixtape  
ennoSHITa: i dont want to know

 **ennoSHITa** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **ennoSHITa** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: im sorry i have to do this to you mom #2 but  
literalsunshine: this is hte way it is  
literalsunshine: no one escapes from #MEMEMIXTAPE2K16  
ennoSHITa: i cant forgive you for this hinata  
literalsunshine: [cries]  
dadchi: //Slap  
dadchi: Get yourself together, mom in training  
sugamomma: YOU CANT NOT FORGIVE YOUR CHILDREN ENNOSHITA YOU ASSHOLE  
ennoSHITa: jfc im sorry, sue me  
dadchi: Okay whatever im going back to sleep

 **yourultimatesenpai** sent a file: **DOOOOO DOO DOO DOOOOOO DOOOO.mp4**

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** sent a file: **DOOOOO DOO DOO DOOOOOO DOOOO.mp4**

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** sent a file: **DOOOOO DOO DOO DOOOOOO DOOOO.mp4**

dadchi: No  
dadchi: Nonono  
dadchi: NO  
dadchi: Oh no nonONONo no nol nonoon ON ON ONON ONON  
dadchi: NO I THOUGHT WE WERE DONE WITH THIS "SPAMMING DAICHI WITH MEMES EVERY 4 AM THING" JUST STOP  
yourultimatesenpai: WERE SECOND YEARS YOU CANT TELL US WHAT TO DO  
ROLLINGTHUNDEr: YEAH

 **ROLLINGTHUNDER** sent a file: **DOOOOO DOO DOO DOOOOOO DOOOO.mp4**

ennoSHITa: ok im going to take a chance and click the fuck outta that  
literalsunshine: moM #2 NO I THOUGHT YOU WERE INTOLERANT TO MEMES  
ennoSHITa: too late  
  
**ROLLINGTHUNDER** sent a file: **DOOOOO DOO DOO DOOOOOO DOOOO.mp4**  
  
**ROLLINGTHUNDER sent a file: **DOOOOO DOO DOO DOOOOOO DOOOO.mp4****  
  
literalsunshine: ennoshita its been a few minutes are you okay  
ennoSHITa: kill them  
kingofthecourt: what were killing somebody  
kingofthecourt: who is it i wanna help  
TsukishimaKei: its you  
TsukishimaKei: come on everyone time to commit regicide  
literalsunshine: wtf does regicide mean  
TsukishimaKei: look it up you uncultured swine  
kingofthecourt: And from that day forward, Kageyama Pablo declared Tsukishima Kei his mortal enemy.  
literalsunshine: stop  
kingofthecourt: What if I don't?  
literalsunshine: ill kill u  
ennoSHITa: ok stop were not killing kageyama pablo were killing fucking noya and tanaka  
yourultimatesenpai: what us  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we are perfect angels who did not do anything  
yourultimatesenpai: spare us please  
ennoSHITa: FIND OUT YOURSELVES WHAT THEY DID  
ennoSHITa: THESE TWO ARE NO ANGELS THEYRE DEMONS  
literalsunshine: omfg  
kingofthecourt: what  
literalsunshine: its them dancing to never gonna give you up in the backseat of tanaka's sister's car  
dadchi: STOP SPAMMING THAT BULLSHIT'  
yourultimatesenpai: were not spamming  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we would never do such a thing we are perfect angels  
yourultimatesenpai: yes whoever spammed that should have to clean the gym for a month  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: maybe not that far  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: maybe just like a week or something  
dadchi: IT WAS YOU IT WAS OBVIOUSLY YOU  
yourultimatesenpai: no  
kingofthecourt: just kill me wtf is happening  
dadchi: ITS 4 AM AND I JUST WANNA SLEEP FUCKI YOU AL

 **dadchi** left the conversation.

literalsunshine: omfg i cant add him again he blocked me  
sugamomma: //siiigiggghhh  
sugamomma: ok ill go talk to him

 


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hello yes this fic is Alive(trademark)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its been a while since ive updated so heres this
> 
> yuuri_79: FUCK YOU HINATA, FUCK YOU AND YOUR STUPID ORANGE HAIR  
> literalsunshine: now that was just uncalled ofr, my orange hiar is not stupid

literalsunshine: hello yes guys i made some new friends ((((: (: (: (: (: (:  
literalsunshine: uyes cna i add them ((: ( :((:(: : ( (: (: (:  
literalsunshine: also i need to add lev its important guys please  
dadchi: Okay  
literalsunshine: nice serve  
kingofthecourt: thanks  
literalsunshine: i meand to just tpe nice but im used to saying nice serve oOPS\  
literalsunshine: kaGEYAMA WHY DID YOU SAY THANKX  
literalsunshine: THAT COULD HAVE NBEEN DIRECXTED AT ANYONE?? ?? ? ? ????? ??? ? ?? ?? ?? ?? ??  
kingofthecourt: SHIT SON IDK IM USED TO HEARING IT AND I WAS LIKE "OH HE MEANS ME" IDKF?? ? ?? ?  
literlasunshine: whatever anyway

 **literalsunshine** added **v-nikiforov.** , **yuuri_79** , and **russianblue** to the conversation.

v-nikiforov.: niCE  
v-nikiforov.: hello people i dont know!!!  
yuuri_79: oh yes, my fave  
yuuri_79: oh boy i love having new chats to be awkward in  
v-nikiforov.: im sure youll be fine yuuri its fine everythings all good  
TsukishimaKei: who the fuck  
literalsunshine: OH YEAH SPEAKING OF TSUKISHIMA  
literalsunshine: viktor.............. can u like........................................ add yuri in also  
v-nikiforov.: ye ok  
gucci: waiT

 **v-nikiforov.** added **yUriwhatthefUck** to the conversation.

yUriwhatthefUck: what the fuck  
yUriwhatthefUck: who the fuck  
TsukishimaKei: hinata you goddamned shrimp who the fuck are these twats you added  
literalsunshine: friends of mine (((: (: (: (: (: (: :(:( :((:( : (:(:(:( (:  
russianblue: is thAT VIKTOR NIKIFOROV HOLY FUCC  
v-nikiforov.: a fan?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????  
russianblue: YES 100% I AM,,,,, SCREAM IN G, , , ,,,,,,,, , , , ,,,, , , ,,, ,, ,,  
literalsunshine: lev what the fuck  
russianblue: HIANTA HOW THEUFCKFC DO YOU KNOW HIM  
literalsunshine: i have never, ever seen lev this excited  
literalsunshine: and hes a pretty excited dude  
literalsunshine: ive also never seen him swear  
literalsunshien: but LEV  
russianblue: ???  
literalsunshine: i added him because you are both the Russian Friend™  
yUriwhatthefUck: what about me am i not the Russian Friend™  
literalsunshine: you are Russian Friend #2™  
yUriwhatthefUck: what the fuck rude  
dadchi: Hinata who the fuck are these people  
literalsunshine: oh  
literalsunshine: INTRODUCE YO SELVES  
v-nikiforov.: professional figure skater? won 5 grand prix finals in a row. Viktor Nikiforov, you may have heard of me?  
v-nikiforov.: pretty big deal yeah?  
yuuri_79: wow and the only thing you capitalized was your name  
yuuri_79: im yuuri katsuki  
yuuri_79: less professional figure skater but also a figure skater yes hello  
yUriwhatthefUck: im the more important yuri and also im a better skater  
v_nikiforov.: now now  
wakemeupinside: ok so thats how lev knows viktor then? because they are russian  
yUriwhatthefUck: i am also russian  
v-nikiforov.: yes, well i have no idea who this lev character is  
russianblue: thaTS ME Im a big fan hello  
v-nikiforov.: hi  
kingofthecourt: this is already a shitstorm  
yourultimatesenpai: i dont wanna grow up im a toy r us kid  
literalsunshine: tanaka what the fuck  
yUriwhatthefUck: that is my line asshole  
TsukishimaKei: tch yeah right, you probably couldnt even say it without stuttering  
yUriwhatthefUck: psh, you probably dont even know who i am  
TsukishimaKei: wanna bet plisetsky  
yUriwhatthefUck: WHAT THE FUCK  
yUriwhatthefUck: WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DUMBASS  
kingofthecourt: HELLO THAT IS MY WORD SO DONT FUCKING USE IT BITCH  
literalsunshine: holy fuck are we seriously arguing over bullshit like this  
yUriwhatthefUck: YOU STAY OUT OF THIS SHORTY  
literalsunshine: okaY THAT IS IT, FUCK OFF YURI  
yuuri_79: what  
literalsunshine: YOU ARE THE SAME FUCKING HEIGHT AS ME FUCKER  
yUriwhatthefUck: EXCUSE I AM 1 CM TALLER THAN YOU  
russianblue: hey there kids make way for the 194 cm me  
v-nikiforov.: im a happy medium, 180 cm  
literalsunshine: vikmtor that is NOEWHERE NEA R THE MIDDLE SO WHY DONT YOU SHTUI THE FUCK UYP[  
v-nikiforov.: OKAY IM SORRY  
literalsunshine: YUURI HOW TALL AREYOU YOU BITCHSHIT  
yuuri_79: what  
yuuri_79: like 170 something why  
literalsunshine: SEE VIKTOR THATXS A HAPPY MEDIUM THERE YOU FUCKIGN GO  
yuuri_79: uh  
kingofthecourt: wait a sec hiNAT IF YOU GET TO ADD YOUR DUMBASS FRIENDS FROM OTHER SPORTS SO DO I  
dadchi: KAGEYAMA NO

 **kingofthecourt** added **ionlyswimFree** , **momfriend** , **THUG** , and **leavemealone** to the conversation.

kingofthecourt: FYCK RTHE RULES  
sugamomma: i didnt know we had rules about this  
momfriend: i cannot help but notice the word mom in your name are you a fellow Team Mom  
sugamomma: i just so happen to be  
momfriend: Wow™

 **literalsunshine** renamed the chat to **"shitstorm".**

literalsunshine: because thats what ir is  
leavemealone: well that isnt very nice now is it  
TsukishimaKei: NOW WHO ARE THESE TWATS  
leavemealone: IM REI RYUGAZAKI NOW WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU  
ROLLINGTHUDNER: i saw ryu and instantly thought of tanaka  
yourultimatesunshine: ryuunosuke is nothing like ryugazaki noya you asshole  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i saw ryu ok  
v-nikiforov.: who are they  
ionlyswimFree: kageyama why  
kingofthecourt: ((: (: (: (:  
literalsunshine: DO YOU SEE THAT ITS TERRIFYING EVEN WHEN ITS ONT HE ITNERNET KAGEYAMA FUCKING STOP  
kingofthecourt: (:  
gucci: what is happening  
THUG: ill tell you whats happening  
THUG: its raining tacos  
THUG: from out ofthe sky  
THUG: tacos  
THUG: no need ot ask why  
leavemealone: nagISA NOT THIS AGAIN  
THUG: (((:  
yuuri_79: what is going on  
ionlyswimFree: can i go  
kingofthecourt: dont be an asshole haru (: (: (: (:  
ionlyswinFree: i will be an asshole if i want to  
literalsunshine: who ARE THEY KAGEYAMA  
kingofthecourt: well haru is my cousin  
kingofthecourt: and the other ones are his friends  
momfriend: WOW RUDE  
ennoSHITa: WOW ANOTEHR MOM  
ennoSHITa: PLEASE TEACH ME YOUR WAYS MOTHER  
sugamomma: heyyyy ): ): ):  
momfriend: we can all excahnge mom knowledge  
russianblue: what  
russianblue: if were exchanging mom knoWLEDGE WHAT ABOUT YAKU

 **russianblue** added **demon_senpai** to the conversation.

demon_senpai: LEV WHAT THE FUCK DID I TELL YOU  
russianblue: i KNOW BUT LIKE  
demon_senpai: GOD FUXCKING DMAMNIT LEV WHAT DID I FUCKING TELL YOU ABOUT ADDIGN ME TO CHATS  
russianblue: YOU  
russianblue: YOU SAID YOUD KICK ME SO HARD IN THE SHINS THEYD BREAK OFF AND ID BE AN AMPUTEE FOR THE RST OF MY LIFE AND NEVER PLAY VOLLEYBALL EVER EVER AGAIN BUT  
demon_senpai: YES SO YOU CAN IMAGINE  
demon_senpai: YOU CAN IMAGINE I MEANT WHAT I SAID YES?  
russianblue: YEAH BUT  
sugamomma: yaku must be anger mom because damn  
dadchi: Whos the team father  
sugamomma: not lev, id imagine  
momfriend: holy shit  
THUG: makOOOOOTOOOOOOO U SWORRE  
momfriend: nagisa lets play who broke the sugar bowl  
kingofthecourt: IT WAS ME I BROKE IT WITH A FUCIKIGN BASEBALL BAT  
dadchi: I THOUGHT WE SAID WE WERENT PLAYING BASEBALL  
v-nikiforov.: oh, you bunch play baseball?  
leavemealone: no we swim  
v_nikiforov.: hinata you swim  
kingofthecourt: my name is kageyama pablo and i play baseball  
literalsunshine: you see this is why i named it shitstorm  
yUriwhatthefUck: this is stupid you people are stupid  
TsukishimaKei: oh? surely no stupider than you  
gucci: yeah!!! tsukki is really bringing out the asshole comments  
TsukishimaKei: shut up yamaguchi  
gucci: sorry tsukki  
literalsunshine: alexander hamilton  
literalsunshine: troops are waiting in the field for you  
dadchi: stop  
literalsunsunshine: if you join us right now together we can turn the tIIiIiIIIiiIIIiIiIIIIDE OHHHHH  
sugamomma: uh, hinata  
kingofthecourt: ALEXANDER HAMILTON  
kingofthecourt: I HAVE SOLDIERS THAT WILL YIELD FOR YOU  
kingofthecourt: IF WE MANAGE TO GET THIS RIIIIIIIIIGHT  
dadchi: sto p  
kingofthecourt: THEYLL SURRENDER BY EEAAARYLLYYY LIGHT  
sugamomma: uh guys, daichi is gonna..  
v-nikiforov.: the world will neVER BE THE SAAAME  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ALEXANDEERRERERERRRRRRRRRRRR  
dadchi: OKAY FYUCKIGN SOTP  
dadchi: I AHVE HAD ENOUGH OF YU BURSTING OUT IN SONG FOR NO REASON  
dadchi: AND  
dadchi: AND  
dadchi: AND SYAING STUFF I DONT FUCKIGN UDNERSTANT  
dadchi: FUCKING GEMSTONE BASED CONVERSTAION S AND WIT FUCKIGN HOMoSTUCK AND THEN NOW, WHO THE FUCKI IS ALEXANDER HAMILTON  
v-nikiforov.: swan lake has also frozen over  
v-nikiforov.: ive endured the cold too  
russianblue: therES A HILL WHERE SUNFLOWERS GROW TOO  
russianblue: THE REGION IS CALLED TSUNERE BUT  
literalsunshine: ITS A TUNDRA  
dadchi: STO P  
russianblue: MY PERSONALITY ISNT ALWAYS APPARENT  
russianblue: "FULL OF MYSTERIES" THEY SAY AND GET SCARED  
v-nikiforov.: THE COSSACK DANCE IS PRETTY FAMOUS, ISNT IT  
v-nikiforov.: WITHOUT USIING THEIR HANDS THEY CAN KICK [PRETTY HARD  
russianblue: FROM BEHIND BE-BE-BEAT UP ALL THE BULLIES (YAKU)  
demon_senpai: shouldnt i be the one kicking you  
dadchi: I AHTE THSI  
yourultimatesenpai: HEY WHO THE RUCK IS THEIS DMEON SENPAI IM THE ONLY SENPAI ANY OF YOU ANRE ALLWOD TO HAVE  
demon_senpai: HYE YOU FUCK OFF  
v-nikiforov.: im your senpai, right yuuri?  
yuuri_79: yeah sure  
TsukishimaKei: i have a song too  
dadchi: Oh what the fuck ever go ahead  
TsukishimaKei: short people got no reason  
TsukishimaKei: short people got no reason  
TsukishimaKei: short people got no reason to liiiiiiive  
TsukishimaKei: they got  
literalsunshine: whATT THE FUCK  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: HEY THERE ASSHOLE  
yUriwhatthefUck: OK SERIOSUYYL WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE  
THUG: WHO THE HELL TOLD YOU YOU WERE ALLOWED TO SAY THAT  
TsukishimaKei: little hands  
TsukishimaKei: little eyes  
TsukishimaKei: they walk around tellin great big lies  
literalsunshine: KAGEYAMA STAND UP FOR ME  
kingofthecourt: well he makes valid points, you have very little features  
literalsunshine: IM BOUTTA FUCKIN SCREAM  
TsukishimaKei: they got  
TsukishimaKei: little noses  
TsukishimaKei: tiny little teeth  
TsukishimaKei: they wear platform shoes on their nasty little feet  
dadchi: OKAY I THINK THAT IS ENOUGH OUT OF YOU  
THUG: MOMKOTO THIS MAN IS BULLYING ME  
momfriend: rude nobody bullies my kids  
momfirend: suga keep your children under control  
sugamomma: if you said that about any of my other kids id slap the shit outta you but like............ tsukishima is an asshole i cant say anything about that  
yUriwhatthefUck: VIKTOR  
yUriwhatthefUck: VIKOTR SUE HIM  
v-nikiforov.: y  
v-nikiforov.: yuri i cant sue someone for something so trivial  
yUriwhatthefUck: YORUE FAMOUS YOU CNA DO ANYHTING YOU WANT  
ennoSHITa: are yall gonna exchange mom knowledge w/ me or nah  
momfriend: i have some good advice  
ennoSHITa: WHAT  
momfriend: if they sass you  
momfriend: eat th e m  
sugamomma: what  
momfriend: e a t t h e m  
demon_senpai: no  
demon_senpai: if they sass you, kick them  
v-nikiforov.: if they sass you, dont let them skate until they apologize  
v-nikiforov.: warning in advance, yuuri  
yuuri_79: yES OK POINT MADE  
wakemeupinside: GUYS YOU KNOW WHAT I JUST REALIZED  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WHAT IS IT ASASSY  
wakmeupinside: ok wait a second what teh fuck did you just call me  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we were talking about sass so i thought, asahi, that sounds like asassy, im going to call him that  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and i did  
wakemeupinside: ok sure whatever  
wakemeupinside: anYWAY I JUST REALIZED THAT WHEN WE WERE THINKING OF OTHER SPORTS TO PLAY WE DIDNT CONSIDER ICE SKATING  
literalsunshine: yes we did  
kingofthecourt: figure skating isnt the same as hockey  
yuuri_79: whaTT THE HELL DID YOU  
yuuri_79: DID YOIU JUST COMPARE FIGUERE SKATING TO HOKCEY  
literalsunshine: yes?  
yuuri_79: FUCK YOU HINATA, FUCK YOU AND YOUR STUPID ORANGE HAIR  
literalsunshine: now that was just uncalled ofr, my orange hiar is not stupid  
v-nikiforov.: YUURI YOU JUST SWORE  
THUG: MOMKOTO ARREST THIS MAN  
yourultimatesenpai: clowns  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WHAT THE CUCK TANAK A DONT EVEN JOKE ABOUT THAT  
yourultimatesenpai: i  
yourultimatesenpai: i was calling them clowns  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: oh  
literalsunshine: you knwo waht fuck you im leaving the volleyball club and joining the lettuce club  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wait theRE WAS A LETTUCE CLUB THIS YEAR???  
dadchi: HINATA WTF THATS???? SO SUDDEN???????????  
TsukishimaKei: its just a club  
yourultimatesenpai: FUCK YOU TSUKISHIMA  
yUriwhatthefUck: come join viktors apparent school for skating that i was not invited to, jfc rude  
v-nikiforov.: are you still mad about me coaching yuuri  
yUriwhatthefUck: shut up  
literalsunshine: nooooooooooo im joinging the lettutututce club  
kingofthecourt: im tossing the goddamned lettuce in the trash, then u cant leave  
literalsunshine: ill spike it!!!!!!  
kingofthecourt: i  
kingofthecourt: not that kind of toss  
literalsunshine: wait brb  
kingofthecourt: ??????????  
v-nikiforov.: can i join the volleyball club  
v-nikiforov.: i mean im not in highschool anymore but  
takeda: ha hahahah aha ha hah ahaa haaaaaaaaaa. ha.  
takeda: neither am i but WOW!!!! here i am  
v-nikiforov.: :0 who are you  
takeda: im the teacher advisor for the volleyball team  
keishin_ukai: im their coach

(literalsunshine: ayyy u there fam  
bleach: yea boi whatchu need (:  
literalsunshine: as my local meme dealer i call upon you  
literalsunshine: join our team chat and fuck it up even more than if already is?  
bleach: (; i gochu)

literalsunshine: hello boys  
gucci: i forbid you from ever saying that again  
ionlyswimFree: oh my god im  
ionlyswimFree: ok bye this is fucking stupid  
kingofthecourt: haru nooooooooooo

 **ionlyswimFree** left the conversation.

 **literalsunshine** added **ionlyswimfree** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: nobody escapes shitstorm

(literalsunshine: hey!!  
aone_and_atwo_and_athree: hm??  
literalsunshine: you got a minute?  
literalsunshine: or more haha  
literalsunshine: i wanna add u to our group chat!!  
aone_and_atwo_and_athree: (aωa) sure)

russianblue: ok takeda  
russianblue: youre the guy witht eh brown hair right?  
takeda: yes?  
russianblue: that means ukai must be the blond one  
russianblue: takeda i would like to tell you that when i first saw u when we played karasuno was  
russianblue: "damn his eyebrows are on point"  
literalsunshine: actually............ they are  
takeda: what  
v-nikiforov.: what your teacher has nice eyebrows  
v-nikiforov.: shoW ME  
leavemealone: i want to see how beautiful this senseis eyebrows really are  
THUG: dont be creepy rei  
takeda: do not  
keishin_ukai: actually you know what........... i think they are pretty nice  
takeda: dO NOT  
dadchi: What the fuck is wrong with my team  
sugamomma: i, as vice captain, can confirm that thsi team is completely inside  
momfriend: the things one endures for being mom  
v-nikiforov.: SEND PIC  
v-nikiforov.: SEND PIC  
v-nikiforov.: SEND PIC  
v-nikiforov.: SEND PIC  
v-nikiforov.: SEND PIC  
v-nikiforov.: SEND PIC  
v-nikiforov.: SEND PIC  
dadchi: Stop  
leavemealone: SEND PIC  
leavemealone: SEND PIC  
leavemealone: SEND PIC  
leavemealone: SEND PIC  
dadchi: STOP  
sugamomma: hey i know you guys arent on our team but....  
sugamomma: when daichi tells you to do something you do it  
sugamomma: unless you want him to go in fucking sane  
v-nikiforov.: yes mom  
v-nikiforov.: now anyway  
v-nikiforov.: SEND PIC  
takeda: DO NOT  
literalsunshine: [there he is](http://pm1.narvii.com/5907/c29ed31ba28b6a56e2b1a6836d33531c3fa0d63d_hq.jpg)  
takeda: goddamnit  
v-nikiforov.: holy shit  
takeda: wh  
v-nikiforov.: whaT DO YOU MEAN WH YOUR FUCKING EYEBROWS ARE BETTER THAN MINE HOW THE HELL  
yuuri_79: holy shit  
THUG: WHY  
THUG: YOUR EYEBROWS................... REI WHY CANT YOU HAVE EYEBROWS LIKE THAT  
leavemealone: WHAT  
leavemealone: MY EYEBROWS ARE PERFECTLY FINE, SHUT UP  
momfriend: they could be better  
leavemealone: WAUUGUHG

(literalsunshine: hey i have another favor to ask  
grand_king: oh? chibi-chan, i thought we worked out a price  
literalsunshine: yeah yeah  
literalsunshine: ill bribe iwaizumi brb)

ROLLINGTHUNDER: ok hold up a sec  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: stop everything  
ennoSHITa: what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i was watching a recording of us at the game with aoba johsai  
demon_senpai: DONT YOU FUCKING DARE SAY THAT NAME AROUND ME  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and i realized just how bi i was  
literalsunshine: SOBBIGN IS IT HAPPENING IS MY SON CONFESSING  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: hinata i am Older Than You  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: anyway i dont have anything to confess  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: as i was saying  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i was looking at asassy  
wakemeupinside: ok if youre going to call me taht im changing my name  
literalsunshine: YOU WERE LOOKING AT HIM  
literalsunshine: WHY  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i just was, ok?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and i realized how nice his thighs are  
literalsunshine: noya.......................  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what  
literalsunshine: noya oh boy do i have news for you.......................................................  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: HSUT UP  
v-nikiforov.: oh? does out noya have a crush on this Asassy With Nice Thighs??  
v-nikiforov.: how sweet! reminds me of yuuri!  
yuuri_79: WHAT VIKTO IT ISNT LIKE THAT I JUST  
yuuri_79: YORUE A REALLY GOOD SKTTER AND ALL SO I JUST  
yuuri_79: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
kingofthecourt: did that say setter or skater  
asassy: noya.............................................................................................................................................  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WHAT  
asassy: noya even i can tell how much youre crushing on me  
asassy: and thats super embarrassing to say but nOYA HOLY SHIT YOU ARE SO OBLIVIOUS ITS LIKE KAGEYAMA AND FUCKING HIANTA MIXED WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: SHUT

 **literalsunshine** added **bleach** , **aone_and_atwo_and_athree** , and **grand_king** to the conversation.

literalsunshine: ((((:  
dadchi: HIANTA WHT HEI FUCKUIE RWYIODSUF YFFUCKGN WPROBLE M WHAT 4EHTE RUCIK I THUFKCING THOUGHT YOU WERE DUPPOED OT FUCKIGN NOT SO DHT ATW E GUFCKCING TALKED ABOUT TYHIS YOU ASSHOEL  
literalsunshine: ((((((((((((((((((((:  
dadchi: Im soggy with tears  
dadchi: Are you just played "How Many People Can I Add Before Chat Breaks"  
literalsunshine: thats not how it started but i sort of am now  
bleach: drink me  
v-nikiforov.: HA  
v-nikiforov.: thats clever, it is  
yuuri_79: no its not  
grand_king: oh? viktor nikiforov?  
v-nikiforov.: the one and only  
grand_king: youre that russian skater hmm? youre pretty, but no prettier than me.  
russianblue: SHUT THE FUCK UP OIKAWA  
grand_king: who the fuck  
yUriwhatthefUck: thats my line  
TsukishimaKei: havent we been over this already?  
yUriwhatthefUck: fuck you and fuck your stupid face  
TsukishimaKei: youve never seen my stupid face. how do you even know its stupid?  
yUriwhatthefUck: WOW FUCK YOU JUST, GRAAARAHHAHAHRHARHRHGHAGRAERAGMERJFDOAE  
leavemealone: thats how i feel too  
literalsunshine: hello yes im forming an I Hate Tsukishima Kei Club, who wants to join  
kingofthecourt: i thouhgt you were joining the lettuce club  
literalsunshine: fuck you kageyama  
dadchi: Now now boys  
dadchi: Behave  
sugamomma: aww sweetie you sounded so fatherly just then  
dadchi: Of course  
literalsunshine: ew, mom and dad, sto p  
TsukishimaKei: i hate this group chat thats what i hate  
gucci: ((:  
bleach: hey hinata im here to do the Thing yeah?  
literalsunshine: ye (((^;  
bleach: //ahem  
bleach: HEAR YE HEAR YE, FUCKING FEAR ME  
bleach: AY YO ITS THE MEME GOD HERE TO FUCKING DROP THE MIC WHERE ALL MY HOMEBOYS AT  
bleach: DUDE YOU WANT SOME SPICY MEMES? I GOT SPICY MEMES FOR YOU  
yourultimatesenpai: HEY WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WERE THE ONLY MEMERS ALLWOED  
bleach: huh?? dont you know who i am  
yourultimatesenpai: n  
yourultimatesenpai: no?  
bleach: what the fuck? hey its terushima  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: the dudebro with the cooll hair????  
bleach: thats me my man B))))  
yourulitmatesenpai: HOLY SHIT, YOURE A MEME GOD  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: TEACH US YOUR WAYS  
yachi: wait what the fuck did i miss, i was doing............. stuff  
literalsunshine: yach i  
yachi: yes that is my name  
literalsunshine: scroll the FUCK up  
yachi: theres too much chat to read you fucker  
grand_king: wait terushima the hot dude with the hair?  
bleach: das me my friend B)  
grand_king: hoohohohohoholy shit  
literalsunshine: does anyone else think terushima would look like noya if his hair were natural and he dyed a strip like noya  
asassy: actually  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wht the fuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanna do an irl version (kinda) of this chap where theyre not on skype and the writing is actually good
> 
> also sorry for ending it there but im running out of ideas  
> remind me i have bullshit planned for next chap


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i finally started kuroko no basuke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> literalsunshine: ASAHI COME PIC K ME IP  
> asassy: WHAT WHY ME  
> literalsunshine: BECAUSE FUCK YOU THATS WHY NOW COME PICK ME UP BEFORE I GET ARRESTED  
> asassy: I CANT BE A GETAWAY DRIVER WHT IF WE BOTH GET ARRESTED

v-nikiforov.: so you people swim right  
asassy: what the fuck  
leavemeone: haVE YOU SEEN MY SON  
THUG: im gonna touch the butt!!!  
leavemealone: NAGISA DO NOT  
THUG: *touches the boat*  
literalsunshine: HE TOUCHED THE BUTT  
aone_and_atwo_and_athree: wha t  
literalsunshine: ((((:  
grand_king: hinata did you bribe iwa-chan  
literalsunshine: fuCK  
kingofthecourt: tsk tsk now whos the professional procrastinator  
literalsunshine: shut the fuck up kageyama

(literalsunshine: iwaizumi i have a huge favor to ask you  
NotShittykawa'sMom: hinata no im not joining your stupid group chat  
literalsunshine: please  
NotShittykawa'sMom: nO  
NotShittykawa'sMom: stop using your powers of persuasion  
NotShittykawa'sMom: you probably added oikawa  
NotShittykawa'sMom: uggghh i cant join its always full of memes  
NotShittykawa'sMom: STOP GUILT TRIPPING ME  
NotShittykawa'sMom: UGGGHHHHJ OK FINE I CANT BELIEVE YOURE FORCING ME TO DO THIS  
literalsunshine: i didnt even say anything  
literalsunshine: anyways thats not what icame to ask you  
literalsunshine: you know what i want  
NotShittykawa'sMom: NO HINATA im not going to feed oikawa grapes while he lays on the piano in the aoba johsai music room  
literalsunshine: will u water his garden  
NotShittykawa'sMom: uggghh fine  
literalsunshine: 2/3, not bad)

literalsunshine added NotShittykawa'sMom to the conversation.

grand_king: ooh is he gonna water my garden?  
literalsunshine: ye  
TsukishimaKei: another twat  
literalsunshine: ooh that remids me, while were on the topic of adding people

literalsunshine added kagamimimi and kuroko'svanillashake to the conversation.

kagamimimi: CAN EVERYONE STOP ADDIN ME TO BULLHIT LIKETHIS JFC  
literalsunshine: kagami shut up  
dadchi: Hinata i hate you  
NotShittykawa'sMom: what the fuck is this hinata  
literalsunshine: (:  
kingofthecourt: (:  
literalsunshine: sto p  
kagamimimi: what even is  
ionlyswimFree: and im here why  
literalsunshine: idk but u aint leavin  
yuuri_79: apparently were all hostage here free swim-san so suck it up  
kagamimimi: the only person i know here is fucking hinata what the fuck  
v-nikiforov.: oh youre a glass half empty guy huh  
literalsunshine: im a glass half full guy  
russianblue: im a glass with water in it guy  
yUriwhatthefUck: im a who cares i prefer gatorade guy  
sugamomma: im a shut the fuck up yuri gatorade is shit guy  
yUriwhatthefUck: iM A FUCK OFF SUGA YOURE FUCKING STUPID AND ALSO NOT MY MOM GUY  
kuroko'svanillashake: im a glass with water in it guy too  
asassy: whERE THE FUCC  
yUriwhatthefUck: EHO THE HELL  
TsukishimaKei: WHAT KIND OF TWATFACE BITCH----  
kagamimimi: KUROKO WHEN THE FUCK DID YOU GET HERE  
kuroko'svanillashake: ive been here  
ionlyswimFree: wow guys hinata added him and u didnt even...  
russianblue: oh man that happens to me all the time  
yuuri_79: i wish it happened to me all the time, id get out of a lot of weird situations  
v-nikiforov.: dont be silly yuuri! charm (such as mine) can get you out of any situation!  
v-nikiforv.: ex, getting really drunk an lighting your ice skates on fire and trying to skate in them on the street at two am and getting arrested because your neighbor called the police because you were yelling really loudly about fire burning your feet!  
kagamimimi: what the fuck  
momfriend: that was strangely specific  
v-nikiforov.: hahahahahahaha.  
yuuri_79: wtf viktor  
literalsunshine: KAGEYAMA TOSS TO ME  
kingofthecourt: what the fuck  
literalsunshine: (and that is how you pivot)  
kuroko'svanillashake: kagami toss to me  
kagamimimi: kuroko they are talking about volleyball  
v-nikiforov.: wait, i thought they played baseball? or swam?  
literalsunshine: we play a mix of the two. its called swimming baseball u basically just play baseball in a pool.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: its an olympic sport!  
yourultimatesenpai: were one of the best highschool powerhouses!  
kagamimimi: what the fUCK I WANNA PLAY SWIMMING BASEBALL  
kuroko'svanillashake: do you even know how to play baseball kagami  
kagamimimi: SHUT THE FUCK UP OF COURSE I DO  
v-nikiforov.: aw man i wanna play too  
v-nikiforov.: is there such thing as baseball on ice  
yuuri_79: viKTOR NO WE ARE NOT DOING THAT  
v-nikiforov.: I JUST GOT INSPIRATION FOR A NEW PROGRAM  
yuuri_79: WHYHYHYYYYHYHYHYYYYYYYY

literalsunshine: uh, can everone whos not on karasuno leave?  
literalsunshine: daichi was bullying me at practice today abt it ):  
dadchi: It wasnt bullying, it was just  
dadchi: slightly violent persuasion  
NotShittykawa'sMom: a taste of your own medicine hinata  
kagamimimi: but we just got here  
THUG: yeah!!! abyway we cant leave, not until chapter 30, the special!!  
yourultimatesenpai: what  
THUG: what  
leavemealone: nagisa what  
TsukishimaKei: what id with these twat weirdos  
yuuri_79: chapter 30 of............... what, exactly?  
THUG: what?  
grand_king: ok hold that thought, iwa-chan change your fucking name  
NotShittyakawa'sMom: no its true  
grand_king: well i guess it is, because youre my boyfriend arent you iwa-chan?? (>wo)–v  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: hows that  
grand_king: MEAN, iwa-chan!!  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: ohhh so youre going with that cliche  
v-nikiforov.: so m&ms am i right  
literalsunshine: yeah i like them theyre.... good  
v-nikiforov.: (AND THAT. IS HOW. YOU PIVOT.)  
kuroko'svanillashake: i dont really like m&ms  
v-nikiforov.: woAH i forgot you were in here  
kuroko'svanillashake: i doubt youre surprised but that happens a lot  
kagamimimi: tbh--

v-nikiforov.: I DID A CUTE THING

v-nikiforv. added makkachin to the conversation.

v-nikiforov.: ISNT THAT CUTE  
yuuri_79: wAIT VIKTOR WHAT THE FUCK  
makkachin: heisodcohehs  
v-nikiforov.: I GOT MAKKACHIN A PHONE  
yUriwhatthefUck: OK I AGREE WITH JAPANESE YURI HERE, VIKTOR WHAT THE FUCK  
makkachin: akallalakakgvgvjwieixo ene  
kagamimimi: who is makkachin????  
yuuri_79: MAKKACHIN IS VIKTORS DOG  
kagamimimi: wait what thE FUCK VIKTOR YOU GAVE YOUR DOG A FUCKING PHONE?  
v-nikiforov.: yes!!! cute right?  
v-nikiforov.: waiT HES CHEEING ON IT MAKKACHIN NO  
makkachin: keksksoxofoaiagsbah hhhshjosokkdiidiididiiiduhs  
kingofthecourt: what the fuck  
TsukishimaKei: this chat has gone from weird to really weird

literalsunshine renamed the conversation to "weird to really weird".

sugamomma: i know what to do to add a sense of normalcy!  
literalsunshine: what?

(sugamomma: hinata, do you remember getting coach and sensei together?  
literalsunshine: OHH ye im pickin up what ur puttin down momma)

leavemealone: it just got really quiet  
literalsunshine: YOU KNOW WHOS BEEN PRETTY QUIET LATELY  
leavemealone: nevermind  
kagamimimi: who kuroko  
literalsunshine: well yes but isnt he usually like that  
kagamimimi: touche  
kuroko'svanillashake: wo w  
literalsunshine: buT NO THE PERSON I MEANT WAS  
literalsunshine: YAMAGUCHI U HAVE BEEN VERY QUIET LATELY AND U DIDNT SHOW UP TO PRACTICE YESTERDAY OR TODAY  
literalsunshine: HMMM I WONDER IS THERE A REASON TO THAT  
gucci: uhhhh  
gucci: no?  
bleach: on thE TOPIC OF MEMES  
literalsunshine: SHUT UP TERUSHIMA  
literalsunshine: YAMAGUCHI DO YOU HAVE SOMEONE YOU LIKE?  
kingofthecourt: are you trying to cheat on me right in front of m e  
literalsunshine: no kageyama SHUT THE FUCK UP  
literalsunshine: YAMAGUCHI UR ANSWER  
gucci: uh, yes  
literalsunshine: OHOHOHOHO OH REALLY  
gucci: yeah  
literalsunshine: TELL US WHO  
v-nikiforov.: ooooh more crushing  
v-nikiforov.: you kids are cute  
v-nikiforov.: reminds me of yuuri  
yuuri_79: AUUUYUUGHHHH  
gucci: unmmmmm  
gucci: cant  
literalsunshine: I WONDER  
literalsunshine: DOES THAT GET ON TSUKIIS NERVES AT ALL  
TsukishimaKei: dont call me that hinata you stupid short-ass fu ker  
gucci: umm  
TsukishimaKei: why would that even get on my nerves  
TsukishimaKei: what do i care if yamaguchi likes anyone  
yachi: *crashes in through ceiling* sO WHATD I MISS  
yachi: WHATD I MISS  
yachi: KARASUNO MY HOME SWEET HOME I WANNA GIVE YOU A KISS  
yachi: MWAH  
TsukishimaKei: he can like whoever he wants i dONT EVWN CARE OKAY  
yachi: oH OKAY WelL I SEE ITS NOT THE TIME  
yachi: *crawls back up into the hole in the ceiling*  
literalsunshine: IDK TSUKIDHIMA U SEEM PRETTY DANG BOTHERED  
kagamimimi: uh should we leave  
momfriend: in any other chat i would say yes, but in this one i do not recommend trying it  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: hinata this bullshit again  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: well if youre doing it might as well add these two

NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend added puddinghead and imalwaysthisnice to the conversation.

puddinghead: ok i am TRYING to play animal crossing  
literalsunshine: sorry kenma  
imalwaysthisnice: NOOOOOO  
imalwaysthisnice: I WAS FREEEEEE  
grand_king: oh hi kuroo  
imalwaysthisnice: hey oikawa  
literalsunshine: WELL TSUKISHIMA??  
TsukishimaKei: IT DOESNT BOTHER ME  
v-nikiforov.: hinata, hinata, hinata.  
v-nikiforov.: youre going about this all wrong!  
v-nikiforov.: ill show you how its done.

yuuri_79 renamed the conversation to "oh no".

v-nikiforov.: WELL TSUKISHIMA?  
TsukishimaKei: ITS NOT A PROBLEM ALRIGHT WHY DHOULD I CARE IF YAMAGUCHI LIKES DONEONE ELSE  
v-nikiforov.: oh? and what do you mean by "someone else"?  
TsukishimaKei: uHhh I JUST MEANT SOMEONE  
TsukishimaKei: WHY SHOULD I CAREIF YAMAGUCHI LIKES SOMEONE  
v-nikiforov.: well? what would you do if i told you he liked you?  
gucci: UM  
TsukishimaKei: whAT WELL I Uh,  
TsukishimaKei: I DONT CARE THIS ID ALL SO LAME YOURE LAME, HINATA IS LAME AND SHORT, thIS CHAT IS LAME, VOLLEYBALL IS JUST A CLUB  
literalsunshine: why did you feel the need to add the short part  
TsukishimaKei: NEIQOSOSOS

TsukishimaKei left the conversation.

literalsunshine added TsukishimaKei to the conversation.

literalsunshine: no one escapes weird to weirder  
momfriend: so you see what i meant  
momfriend: you cant really leave......  
kagamimimi: jeez brutal  
TsukishimaKei: AAAAGAGGAGGhhh  
v-nikiforov.: what would you do it i told you yamaguchi liked you?  
TsukishimaKei: IT DOESNT MATTER OKAY  
TsukishimaKei: BECAUSE YAMAGUCHI DOESNT EVEN LIKE ME AND HE NEVER WILL SO ITS NT LIKE I EVEN CARE  
gucci: WAIT QIAT WAOT TSUKKI  
gucci: I DO, I DO LIKE YOU  
TsukishimaKei: wait what  
gucci: ummm uh  
gucci: well,,,,,,,,,,,,,,   
gucci: tsukki ive uh  
gucci: ive liked you for a while but i never thought you liked me back  
gucci: uh  
gucci: and i really like you  
gucci: so if youd  
gucci: uh  
gucci: yeah do you wanna  
gucci: aaaaa  
gucci: if you like me back i mean  
TsukishimaKei: shut up yamaguchi  
gucci: sorry tsukki  
TsukishimaKei: yeah, okay  
TsukishimaKei: i like you so  
TsukishimaKei: lets go out  
gucci: aaaAAAAAAaaAAAaa  
yUriwhatthefUck: heartwarming, really, but im getting diabetes.  
TsukishimaKei: yOU SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU GODDAMN PIECE OF SHIT  
TsukishimaKei: I HAVE HEARD ENOUGH OUT OF YPU FOR ONE DAY AND I CANNOT PROPORLU JUYT EHDUISIUDJSJDHHEHSHUS FUCIIIDJEM OTHEBENUXKWT  
gucci: jfc  
dadchi: Tsukishima go in timeout  
TsukishimaKei: WHAT THE FUXK NO PUT THIS YURI FUCKER IN TIME OUT  
dadchi: TSUKISHIMA  
dadchi: TIMEOUT  
TsukishimaKei: UUUUGHHGHGH FINNE

literalsunshine renamed the conversation to "shittier storm".

literalsunshine: because thats what it is  
imalwaysthisnice: hey hate to interrupt the moment but why am i here again  
russianblue: hi kuroo  
imalwaysthisnice: lev what the fuck  
v-nikiforov.: dont worry kuroo i never know whats going on  
v-nikiforov.: because i dont know who any of these people are  
yuuri_79: you know yuri and i  
v-nikiforov.: shut up yuuri  
literalsunshine: you know who i am  
v-nikiforov.: GODDAMNIT YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT  
makkachin: didisisiwjsjnbvgggghrjsjdjjdkkkkkkdkkdkkdkkkkskkkdkkksjkskkksj  
v-nikiforov.: shut up makkachin  
kuroko'svanillashake: its not very nice to tell your dog to shut up  
v-nikiforov.: hOLY HECC I KEEP FORGETTING YOURE HERE  
kuroko'svanillashake: yeah that happens

ionlyswimFree: so, do you think its illegal to marry water  
momfriend: HARU FOR THE LAST TIME IM NOT GONNA LET YOU MARRY A GLASS OF FUCKIN WATER  
THUG: oooooOOOOH MAKOTO  
momfriend: NAGISA HUT THE FICK UP  
leavemealone: let haru marry whoever he wants  
leavemealone: hell, let him marry rin if he really wants to  
ionlyswimFree: but i dont want to marry rin  
ionlyswimFree: i want to marry water  
kagamimimi: can someone tell me why the hell this guy wants to marry water  
literalsunshine: thats haru  
literalsunshine: swimming is, uh, his passion  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: graphic design is my passion  
ennoSHITa: GUYS GUESS WHAT, I FOUND MY PHONE  
ennoSHITa: gdi and its just as memey in here as usual  
yourultimatesenpai: [wink wonk]  
ennoSHITa: quit trying to seduce me tanaka you fucker  
literalsunshine: wait a sec im gonna cout all the people in here  
literalsunshine: theres karasuno, with 10  
literalsunshine: people from other volleyball teams, thats like 8  
literalsunshine: sensei coach yachi an kiyoko make 4  
literalsunshine: swim dudes are 4  
literalsunshine: basketball dudes are 2  
literalsunshine: ice dudes are 4, counting makkachin  
literalsunshine: is there anyone im missing  
dadchi: I dont know hinata maybe keep track of the people you add  
literalsunshine: doin my best papa  
kagamimimi: papa mbaye  
kuroko'svanillashake: omg  
literalsunshine: added together thats 32 people  
dadchi: Wow and i dont like many of them  
grand_king: you like me right  
dadchi: No  
imalwaysthisnice: you like me right  
dadchi: No  
ionlyswimFree: wait what about rin  
momfriend: gdi

ionlyswimFree added shark to the conversation.

shark: i dnont think weRE IN KANSAS ANYMORE TOFU  
yourultimatesenpai: i like this guy already  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: me too he seems memey  
asassy: thats not a good thing  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: of course it is  
dadchi: Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy  
sugamomma: its ok daicho  
dadchi: Et tu, suga?  
sugamomma: celery  
literalsunshine: lettuce club  
sugamomma: no  
literalsunshine: hi rin  
shark: hey shrimpy  
literalsunshine: see hes the only one im ok with calling me shrimpy  
literalsunshine: because hes a shark  
literalsunshine: it just makes sense  
shark: theyre both sea creatures  
literalsunshine: ye s  
literalsunshine: actually you know what kageyama i think you and rin are pretty similar  
kingofthecourt: im not a shark  
literalsunshine: thats not what i meant

literalsunshine: aaauuUGH UMMM HELLO YES CAN SOMEONE COME PICK ME UP  
dadchi: What the fuck why  
literalsunshine: OKAY SO YPU Remmber EHEN I STOLE THAT DIAMOND PLAY BUYTON  
kingofthecourt: WHT THE FUCK YOU WERE SERIOUES ABOUT THT  
shark: SHRIMPY WHAT THE FUCK YOU STOLE A DIAMOND PLAY BUTTON  
v-nikiforov.: HINATA  
literalsunshine: AAAAAaAAAAAAAAA OKAY YEAH I KNOW I WASNT STEALING AT FORST BUT THEN I LIKE,,,, KEPT IT  
kingofthecourt: if you get arrested im breaking up with you  
literalsunshine: KAGEYAMA NOW IS NOT THE TIME  
kingofthecourt: sORRY SORRY I WAS JOKIGN  
literalsunshine: ASAHI COME PIC K ME IP  
asassy: WHAT WHY ME  
literalsunshine: BECAUSE FUCK YOU THATS WHY NOW COME PICK ME UP BEFORE I GET ARRESTED  
asassy: I CANT BE A GETAWAY DRIVER WHT IF WE BOTH GET ARRESTED  
kagamimimi: FUCKSSAKE ILL PICK YOU UP  
literalsunshine: NICCCCEEEE

demon_senpai: what the hell  
imalwaysthisnice: you know what daichi FUCK YOUR RULES

imalwaysthisnice added HOOTIMMAOWL and keiji to th conversation.

demon_senpai: ew its bokuto  
HOOTIMMAOWL: rude  
demon_senpai: jk bokuto u kno ily bro  
keiji: excuse me fucker  
demon_senpai: RUDE akaashi i meant it platonically  
grand_king: FUCK  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: wth trashykawa  
grand_king: I LOST MY GLASSES  
TsukishimaKei: cant say i havent been there  
gucci: youre lucky you have me to be your eyes huh tsukki??  
TsukishimaKei: shut up yamaguchi  
grand_king: ok thats diabetes and all but I CANT FUCKING SEE  
grand_king: and its not like iwa-chan is nice enough to be my eyes all day  
demon_senpai: iwaizumi wtf rude  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: youd know my pain if you had to be in like 5 classes with him plus volleyball practice, this chat, and he comes to my house all the time after school  
demon_senpai: fair enough  
russianblue: yaku would you be my eyes  
demon_senpai: lev you dont even wear glasses  
russianblue: but if i did  
demon_senpai: no  
THUG: id be your eyes rei!  
leavemealone: i dont need eyes  
THUG: yes you do you fuckin tsundere  
literalsunshine: woAH nagisa is some alois trancy shit if i ever did see it  
literalsunshine: kageyama youd be my eyes right  
kingofthecourt: dumbass  
kingofthecourt: no  
kingofthecourt: if i had to i guess...........  
grand_king: ok everyone shut up im blind  
grand_king: iwaizumi come over and be my eyes i dont care if you want to or not  
kagamimimi: i would be kurokos eyes  
kuroko'svanillashake: kagami i dont wear glasses  
yuuri_79: that's getting creepy, i keep forgetting hes here  
kagamimimi: jeez kuroko that happens more often than i thought  
kuroko'svanillashake: you do it all the time  
kagamimimi: yeah lmao

ionlyswimFree: hinata change your name to literallamp  
literalsunshine: what why  
ionlyswimFree: because your sunny personality is FAKE YOU FAKER  
THUG: burn  
v-nikiforov.: roasted  
leavemealone: nagisa i cant say any different for you  
yuuri_79: isnt that ironic viktor..................  
literalsunshine: rude

kingofthecourt: hinata did you ever escape the police

kingofthecourt: hinata  
literalsunshine: what  
kingofthecourt: oh my god  
kingofthecourt: did you get arrested  
literalsunshine: what no  
literalsunshine: im at kagamis house  
kagamimimi: lmao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i started kuroko no basuke, finally ((,,,,; now i need to watch the baseball one so i can make kageyama pablo jokes
> 
> if you leave a comment, can you add your favorite line(s) from thr chapter? mine are at the top!  
> thanks for reading!


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fuNNY STORY THAT I WILL EXPLAIN HAHHhAHAHAA.Aahahaa.a.a............... i can explain, just you wait
> 
> grand_king: so iwa-chan  
> NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: i want to die  
> grand_king: im going to take that as a yes  
> grand_king: and since im the captain, im approving this (ｏ∀ ^)v ⌒☆  
> NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: i want to strangle you and then die  
> grand_king: so we can both go to hell together iwa-chan?  
> NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: youre going to hell, whereas i did nothing wrong and am going to heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was watching https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpFxGOg2968 and i had a brilliant idea
> 
> since ive never been to a trampoline park, that video is where most of my knowledge comes from

literalsunshine: kagami its cold in your house  
kagamimimi: then go hOME HINATA YOUVE BEEN HERE FOR TWO DAYS ISNT YOUR MOTHER WORRIED  
literalsunshine: dont bully me ):

ROLLINGTHUNDER: shit son we just got the greatest idea  
shark: what  
yourultimatesenpai: stfu shark boy this has nothing to do w/ u  
shark: hey yOU CANT CALL ME SHARK BOY WHEN YOURE AS MUCH OF A SHARK AS ME  
kingofthecourt: what is ur idea  
yourultimatesenpai: so daichi, suga  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yachi  
yachi: wtf does this have to do with me  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: our idea  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: so, we go to a trampoline park  
dadchi: No  
yourultimatesenpai: but you havent heard our idea yet  
dadchi: Its a bad one though  
yourultimatesenpai: ):  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: were going to tell you anyway and you can judge it when were done  
dadchi: But i already know its a bad idea  
yourultimatesenpai: so, we go to a trampoline park  
dadchi: Gdi  
yourultimatesenpai: and we bring a volleyball net and some balls  
literalsunshine: I KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING AND IM WITH YOU  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and we hide the net and balls and shit in a bag and we find some place to hide it  
sugamomma: and then  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AND THEN  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we jump for a while, act like good civilians just jumping at a trampoline park  
dadchi: This doesnt seem like a good idea  
yourultimatesenpai: WERE NOT DONE  
yourultimatesenpai: and then  
yourultimatesenapi: we find some place to hide ((: (: (: (: (:(: (:(: :(:(:( : :((: (: (: (: (: (:  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and once we know all the employees are gone and shit  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we set up the net in the trampoline park  
ROLLINGTHUDNER: and we play volleyball  
literalsunshine: oh man, and i already jump so high  
literalsunshine: imagine my spikes  
kingofthecourt: im already scared  
yourultimatesenpai: and we stay there  
yourultimatesenpai: ALL NIGHT  
dadchi: NO  
sugamomma: YES  
yachi: oh shit a disagreement  
dadchi: SUGA WHAT THE FUCK WE CANT LET THEM DO THAT  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: its not just us, youll be there too  
sugamomma: COME ON DAICHI WE HAVE TO  
sugamomma: ITS FUCKING VOLLEYBALL IN A FUCKING TRAMPOLINE PARK  
v-nikiforov.: i thought you played water baseball or whatever it was called  
yuuri_79: viktor i think they were messing with you  
v-nikiforov.: whAT THE FUCK  
yUriwhatthefUck: AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA OH YM FUCKIGN GOD  
ionlyswimFree: ok makoto i have an idea  
momfriend: oh god  
ionlyswimFree: so, we go to a trampoline park  
momfriend: haru were not going to take a kiddie pool to a trampoline park  
ionlyswimFree: GODDAMNIT  
v-nikiforov.: yUURI  
yuuri_79: NO  
kuroko'svanillashake: kagami  
kagamimimi: well actually dont they already have basketball shit there  
kuroko'svanillashake: yeah i just wanna go to a trampoline park, take me  
kagamimimi: okay  
grand_king: so iwa-chan  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: i want to die  
grand_king: im going to take that as a yes  
grand_king: and since im the captain, im approving this (ｏ∀ ^)v ⌒☆  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: i want to strangle you and then die  
grand_king: so we can both go to hell together iwa-chan?  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: youre going to hell, whereas i did nothing wrong and am going to heaven  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: so daichi  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: whaddaya say  
dadchi: I guess if suga says yes, no is out of the question  
sugamomma: YAYYYYYYYYY  
literalsunshine: YAYYYYY  
sugamomma: my yay was better  
literalsunshine: waIT NO IT DOESNT MATTER IF MY JUMPS ARE HIGHER BECAUSE SO WILL THE BLOCKERS AND WELL ALL BE THE SAME FUCKIIN HEIGHT AS WE WOULD IF THERE WERE NO TRAMPOLINES AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
kingofthecourt: shut the fuck up hinata you dumbass  
literalsunshine: what the fUCK YOURE SUPPOSED TO BE MY BOYFRIEND  
kingofthecourt: [shrug]

dadchi: Okay i guess if were doing this we ought to do it after school today  
yuuri_79: dont tell me youre actually going through with this  
dadchi: Yuuri my boy, let me tell you, tanaka noya and hinata will not shut the fuck up about it  
yuuri_79: oh  
yUriwhatthefUck: if youre going tak e minami with you  
yuuri_79: what you hang out with minami  
yUriwhatthefUck: more like he hangs off of me, what the fuck this kid  
yuuri_79: you cant call him kid hes older than you  
v-nikiforov.: im older than all of you

yuuri_79 added red-faced-sun-ray to the conversation.

yUriwhatthefUck: my hate for you intensifies  
literalsunshine: if im the sunshine and hes a sun ray does that make him my son  
yuuri_79: yes  
red-faced-sun-ray: wait whose son am i  
demon_senpai: if youre going take lev with you  
russianblue: rude  
red-faced-sun-ray: no seriously who are all you people and whose son am i and what is going on  
keiji: if youre going take bokuto with you  
HOOTIMMAOWL: I WILL GLADLY GO I WANNA JU M P  
keiji: good, please leave  
puddinghead: if youre going take kuroo  
imalwaysthisnice: kENMA WHA TTHE FUCK I  
puddinghead: lmao thats what you get for sneaking up behind me when i was playing sara is missing  
literalsunshine: okay, wait, who all are we taking  
literalsunshine: minami, lev, bokuto, kuroo  
red-faced-sun-ray: wait what where are we going  
yuuri_79: minami just scroll up jfc  
red-faced-sun-ray: ok  
red-faced-sun-ray: wOAH HELL YEAH I WANNA PLAY VOLLEYBALL AT A TRAMPOLINE PARK  
red-faced-sun-ray: one question, how do you play volleyball  
yUriwhatthefUck: think of it like chess  
red-faced-sun-ray: okay thanks yuri!  
v-nikiforov.: YURI THATS RUDE  
yUriwhatthefUck: life is rude  
asassy: wait so are we going to the trampoline park or not  
dadchi: Yeah, i guess  
dadchi: Everyone pack your shit (inclubing minami lev bokuto and kuroo) and ill ask the principal for a bus  
dadchi: I cant believe were doing this  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: FU C K Y E S  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: see tanaka i told you suga would wanna go  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and daichi does whatever suga once  
yourultimatesenpai: you told me dog you warned me about the stairs  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yeah i did

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter: they go to the trampoline park
> 
> put your favorite line(s) of the chap in the comments  
> mine is at the top!!
> 
> i was going to have them go to the park in this chap but my head hurts and im too lazy to think of anything else so??? / / ?? ? / /? ?? ? ? ?
> 
>  
> 
> ALSO OH YEAH I havent watched any of the animes yall have been suggestin to me but i promise theyll all be here by chapter 30!! i havent had time to even continue knb and im pretty sure hq got a new ep but well,,,,,  
> now that im on thanksgiving break i will have 5 days to watch them which is plenty of time for me  
> sO  
> there ya go


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> good chapter  
> good ryse, thank  
> mmmmm yes no???? what  
> im soryr

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yUriwhatthefUck: Я ненавижу тебя  
> v-nikiforov.: ❤︎ you too yura!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> the moment uve all been waiting for.......... TRAMPOLINE PARK CHAPTER!!!!!!

literalsunshine: AHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAHAHA WERE ON A BUS  
kagamimimi: oh god  
ionlyswimFree: MAKOTOOO I WANNA GO TOO  
momfriend: shut the fuck up haru i will not hesitate to stab you 17 times in the face, violently.  
ionlyswimFree: rude  
THUG: MOMKOOOOOTOOOOOOO  
momfriend: NO NAGISA THUG: ):  
kingofthecourt: oh god if we get caught well be criminals  
kingofthecourt: gay criminals  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: puri puri prisoner yourultimatesenpai: haha omg noya shut hte fuck up  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: has anyone else noticed that asahis handle has the word ass in it  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ITS SOME CRAZY COINCIDENCE,,, ,BECAUSE HIS THIGHS AND ALSO BUTT ARE PRETTY NICE  
asassy: noya you need to address your massive crush  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WHAT CRUSH  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: capslock *what crush  
yourultimatesenpai: hes lying  
dadchi: So for anyone not on the bus with us  
dadchi: An update  
dadchi: We are all piled into a bus (including minami lev kuroo and bokuto, excluding asahi bc hes a wimp and didnt want to be involved with out criminal activities  
dadchi: and also yachi and kiyoko???? idk where they at  
dadchi: as well as sensei and coach for obvious reasons)  
yachi: kiyoko-san is sick and im taking care of her  
literalsunshine: yall are cute  
shark: when they gettin married (,;  
literalsunshine: SPEAKING OF MARRIAGE 

literalsunshine added phichit+chu to the conversation.

literalsunshine: PHICHIT, THE RINGS  
phichit+chu: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
dadchi: WHO THE FUCK  
dadchi: HINATA I WILL COME BACK THERE AND KILL YOU AND THE BUS DRIVER WONT SUSPECT A THING BECAUSE YOUR DEATH WILL BE QUICK AND SILENT  
phichit+chu: ooh, violent  
phichit+chu: das a lil spicy  
yuuri_79: oh god why phichit why did you tell hinata abo u t the phichi t pwhy why owuld n you do this to mephi chi t whay  
v-nikiforov.: ayyo  
shark: what is a phichit  
phichit+chu: das my name u stupid  
shark: RUDE  
shark: hinata who tf ))):  
phichit+chu: its thai my bro  
phichit+chu: ANYWAY THATS NOT THE POINT RIGHT NOW  
phichit+chu: GUESS WHOS ENGAGED TO HIS COACH VIKTOR NIKIFOROV  
v-nikiforov.: PHICHIT I KNOW THIS ONE CAN I ANSWER  
phichit+chu: NO VIKTOR STFU FOR A SEC IDC IF UR FAMOUS OR W/E, GUESS WHOS FUCKING ENGAGED TO THIS HANDSOME SILVER HAIRED BEAST  
shark: me  
v-nikiforov.: yes shark man, ill marry u  
phichit+chu: no  
yuuri_79: ok ill be best man  
phichit+chu: YUURI NO  
literalsunshine: why did i let this happen  
literalsunshine: phichit go away )):  
phichit+chu: rude, and also no  
dadchi: AS I WAS SAYING  
phichit+chu: ooh its the violent daddy  
phichit+chu: violent me daddy  
dadchi: I will kick you down a very steep and very tall staircase  
phichit+chu: hot  
yuuri_79: phichit tone down the sass a lil  
phichit+chu: ):  
dadchi: As of right now, the bus is halfway there  
dadchi: The bag of our volleyball supplies is in the back of the bus  
dadchi: Were going to ask to keep it behind the front desk  
dadchi: This is the single most illegal thing weve done  
kagamimimi: what about that time hinata stole a diamond play button and hid out at my house  
dadchi: "weve"  
kagamimimi: oh  
red-faced-sun-ray: i am also here hello  
red-faced-sun-ray: the stupid bus wifi wasnt working for me )))):  
dadchi: We'll catch up for an update when we get to the park  
red-raced-sun-ray: OH COME ON I JUST GOT THE WIFI TO WORK  
dadchi: Wish us luck  
puddinghead: good luck kuroo ily  
imalwaysthisnice: ❤︎  
literalsunshine: WTF THEYRE DATING  
literalsunshine: I DIDNT KNOW THAT  
phichit+chu: ooh spicy  
dadchi: I SAID US NOT KUROO  
dadchi: Whatever anyway  
dadchi: Everyone shut up the wifis getting turned off  
literalsunshine: BYE GUYYYYSSSSSS!!!!!

kagamimimi: ........... its quiet without them here  
kuroko'svanillashake: well it is their chat  
kagamimimi: JESUS FUCKING HELL FORGOT YOU WERE HERE  
kuroko'svanillashake:  
kuroko'svanillashake: much like daichi and makoto, i would like to be violent with you  
v-nikiforov.: WELL WHY DONT YOU FILL UP THE SILENCE MR. KAGAMI  
kagamimimi: nah, its actually nice having a break from all the constant memes  
v-nikiforov.: forgive english, i am Russia.  
kagamimimi: i want to die  
asassy: too bad levs not here, hed laugh at that one  
v-nikiforov.: ):  
yUriwhatthefUck: VIKTOR DID YOU JUST  
yUriwhatthefUck: ok u basically just insulted yourself, me and also yakov  
yUriwhatthefUck: i mean he didnt see that but if he did i bet hed be offended  
yUriwhatthefUck: I BET MILAS OFFENDED TOO  
v-nikiforov.: milas cool shed think thats funny  
keishin_ukai: WAIT WHAT TH EUKFU  
v-nikiforov.: ... who are you  
keishin_ukai: I SHPOULD BE ASKIGN U THAT WHO THE FUCK  
v-nikiforov.: im viktor nikiforov!! im a famous figure skater from russia  
keishin_ukai: ??????  
v-nikiforov.: hold up, i bet ull recognize me if i try hard enough  
yuuri_79: you did not just say hold up  
v-nikiforov.: [HA.jpg](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/94/9d/4a/949d4a72df062d5a66a2ee9feed25197.jpg)  
v-nikiforov.: WHOOPS WRONG PIC  
yUriwhatthefUck: VIKTOR WHAT THE FUCK  
yUriwhatthefUck: FIRST OF ALL THAT PICTURE OF ME IS NOT VERY GOOD,  
yUriwhatthefUck: SECOND OF ALL DID MILA MAKE THIS??? I BET MILA MADE THIS GODDAMNIT I AHTE HER  
keishin_ukai: ?????????????????????????????  
v-nikiforov.: hold. up.  
v-nikiforov.: here  
v-nikiforov.: [cries.gif](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-VR5sBQW9DK4/WANB5Rf6tOI/AAAAAAAABgE/JWGs-MZFjzMgGfzaFviMJ_Agy59gaic2QCJoC/w506-h750/Yuri%2BOn%2BIce%2B-%2BVictor.gif)  
v-nikiforov.: hola me llamo viktor  
yUriwhatthefUck: viktor no, you cant speak spanish  
v-nikiforov.: says you  
keishin_ukai: oh yeah, u look familiar  
keishin_ukai: maybe i saw you on the news??? im not too involved in the skating world  
v-nikiforov.: oh yes! youre their swimming baseball coach right?  
keishin_ukai: what,  
yuuri_79: yikes  
v-nikiforov.: wait  
v-nikiforov.: hold up i gotta go be gay, hold up hold up pls yes thanks you  
yUriwhatthefUck: Я ненавижу тебя  
v-nikiforov.: ❤︎ you too yura!!!!  
grand_king: AW SHIT UR HOT,,,  
v-nikiforov.: what  
grand_kind: you, viktor  
grand_king: why are you so hot  
v-nikiforov.: thanks!!!!!!!!!!! but idk why  
grand_king: send me more selfies (,;  
v-nikiforov.: ILL FOLLOW YOU ON INSTA???? DO YOU HAVE AN INSTA PLEASE FOLLOW MY INSTNA SAME NAME AS MYU SKYPE  
grand_king: OK OK HOLD ON  
v-nikiforov.: *up  
v-nikiforov.: ok now really, i actually do have to go be gay  
v-nikiforov.: brb

THUG: what  
THUG: why was that oikawa guy yelling about how hot viktor is  
THUG: when did he even send a pic,,,,,,,,,  
momfriend: nagisa scroll up and find it  
THUG: I TRIED

yachi: IF OYOU WANNA BE A VILLAIN NUMBER ONE  
yachi: YOU HAVE TO CATCH A HERO ON THE RUN

dadchi: What the fuck  
yachi: oh shit  
dadchi: We arrived at the park and im gettin scared,  
literalsunshine: dont chicken out daichi  
dadchi: HEY WHERE EVEN ARE YOU YOU SHIT  
literalsunshine: relax im looking for hiding spots  
dadchi: ......... Ok fucker  
red-faced-sun-ray: ITS GREAT HERE I FUCKING LOVE THIS  
yuuri_79: minami language  
red-faced-sun-ray: ITS GREAT HERE I HECKING LOVE THIS  
yuuri_79: thank you  
yUriwhatthefUck: aw man i wish i was there  
yUriwhatthefUck: but im stuck here with fucking mila i hate this  
shark: whos mila  
v-nikiforov.: SHARK MAN NO  
phichit+chu: SHARK MAN NOOO  
yuuri_79: WHY, SHARK MAN, WHY  
yUriwhatthefUck: NOW LET ME TELL YOU A THING OR TWO ABOUT GODDAMN MILA  
yuuri_79: yuri plisetsky is forcibly removed from the chat

literalsunshine: im gonna dare minami to jump down from the upper level  
kingofthecourt: omg do it

TsukishimaKei: YAMAGUCHI WATCH THIS  
gucci: TSUKKI NOOOF UCKIGN H LELL  
dadchi: WHATS GOING ON  
dadchi: OH MY GOD NO TSUKISHIMA KEI YOU GET BACK HERE  
asassy: whats going on???

asassy: daichi???  
dadchi: HES CLIMBING UP ON THE BASKETBALL HOOP  
kagamimimi: ive seen hinatas skills at basketball and if this tsukishimas skills are anything like his i suggest you get him down  
asassy: trampolines drive people to madness

dadchi: OKAY EVERYONE, YOU HEARD THE ANNOUNCEMENT, THEYRE CLOSING  
dadchi: EVERYONE KNOWS THEIR HIDING SPOT  
dadchi: GO GO GO

literalsunshine: OK GUYS, THE COAST IS CLEAR  
literalsunshine: LAST OF THE EMPLOYEES JUST LEFT, WERE ON OUR OWN  
literalsunshine: KUROO GET THE NET AND THE VOLLEYBALLS  
imalwaysthisnice: on it

russianblue: this is so creepy were all alone  
red-faced-sun-ray: LEV!!!!!!! YOURE SO TALL GIVE ME A PIGGYBACK RIDE  
russianblue: while jumping on the trampolines?  
red-faced-sun-ray: ofc  
dadchi: NO ST OP  
dadchi: Goddaamnit theyre already doing it

ROLLINGTHUNDER: AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHhahaha BEHIND YOU  
yourultimatesenpai: what  
yourultimatesenpai: IUWEGKXJGSDWEGSDH  
yourultimatesenpai: FUCK HE JUST SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME, IT WAS SO DARK IN OUR HIDING SPOT

red-faced-sun-ray: hehehehehe  
imalwaysthisnice: MINAMI NOOO COME BACK  
imalwaysthisnice: I WANNA DO IT TOO  
dadchi: OH GODDAMNIT WHAT ARE YOU DOIGN  
red-faced-sun-ray: hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe daichi look up  
imalwaysthisnice: hi daichi  
dadchi: GET DOWN FROM THERE  
asassy: ok whos where now  
dadchi: MINAMI WENT ON THE UPPER LEVEL AND HES ABOUT TO JUMP DOWN ONTO THE BIG INFLATABLE TRAMPOLINE THING  
yuuri_79: MINAIEMI  
literalsunshine: AHAHAHAHAHAHHAA HE DID IT THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN  
kingofthecourt: ASERIGJAWREKJJFDFDFD

sugamomma: hehehehh  
dadchi: Oh god what now  
sugamomma: daichi look up  
dadchi: SUGA  
v-nikiforov.: i wish we were there yuuri  
v-nikiforov.: but u gotta compete and im ur coach  
yuuri_79: suck it up buttercup  
v-nikiforov.: exCUSE  
phichit+chu: DAMN VIKTO R WTH DID U DO  
v-nikiforov.: SHIT  
dadchi: SHUT UP, I DONT NEED TO WORRY ABOUT MY TEAM A N D YOU

HOOTIMMAOWL: guys im gonna do a backflip everyone watch  
imalwaysthisnice: WATCHIN U FROM THE UPPER LEVEL WITH MINAMI  
imalwaysthisnice: DO IT BRO  
red-faced-sun-ray: GO BOKUTOO!!!!1!!1!!

HOOTIMMAOWL: OW FUCK

russianblue: where am i  
imalwaysthisnice: i was starting to think it was oddly quiet  
imalwaysthisnice: people were freaking out about how long your legs are and now its just silent  
imalwaysthisnice: where are you  
russianblue: idk i think im in some kind of employee area  
russianblue: HEY THERES COFFEE  
imalwaysthisnice: LEV NO  
imalwaysthisnice: SAVE SOME FOR ME  
dadchi: GUYS THATS STEALING  
imalwaysthisnice: S A V E S O M E F O R M E

yUriwhatthefUck: какого черта  
v-nikiforov.: uggghhh!!!! i wish we were there!!! im screenshotting this and posting it on instagram so my millions of fans can see how much fun im not having  
yUriwhatthefUck: Я ненавижу тебя

literalsunshine: OWW WFUFCKC  
literalsunshine: ANYONE WHO IS ABLE TO JUMP SOMEWHAT CLOSE TO HOW HIGH I CAN  
literalsunshine: DO NOT ATTEMPT A REALLY HIGH JUMP ON THE TRAMPOLINES  
literalsunshine: YOU WILL HIT YOUR HEAD  
dadchi: Hinata you didnt hit your head on the ceiling, lev threw a coffee mug at you  
literalsunshine: oh

gucci: i found the coffee

kingofthecourt: A GMAE OF VOLLEYBALL?????? PLEASE????????????? JUST ONE I REALLY NEED A GAME OF VOLLEYBALL TO RELIEVE SOME STRESS  
dadchi: What stress could you possibly have been under since practice ended  
literalsunshine: KAGEYAMA WHERE ARE YOOUUU  
red-faced-sun-ray: dont worry hinata, im still looking in the employee only rooms!! ill find him soon!  
dadchi: Oh  
imalwaysthisnice: here, lets choose teams and we can play two sets  
imalwaysthisnice: someone needs to keep score  
red-faced-sun-ray: oh oh! ill do it bc idk how to play volleyball

literalsunshine: KAGEYAMA TOSS TO ME AFTER THIS SET  
kingofthecourt: DONT TEXT WHILE WERE IN THE MIDDLE OF A GAME DUMBASS

sugamomma: okay, we better put the net and the volleyballs away  
sugamomma: we got a little too intense after the last game  
literalsunshine: kuroo i hate your blocks and i hate you i hope you fucking die a painful death  
imalwaysthisnice: ┐(Wヮ￣)┌  
sugamomma: come on guys clean up!! all of us!  
red-faced-sun-ray: WOW YOU GUYS ARE SO GOOD AT VOLLEYBALL!!!!

dadchi: FUC FUCK FUCK FUCK UFUCKF UCK SOMEONE CHECK THE TIME  
dadchi: THATS RIGHT FUCKERS ITS TIME FOR THE EMPLOYEES TO COME IN, HURRY UP AND GET BACK TO YOUR HIDING SPOTS  
literalsunshine: I CANT I LOST MY PHONE  
kingofthecourt: HINATA YOU FUCKING DUMBASS IDIOT YOUR PHONE IS IN YOUR HANDS, HYOU ARE TEXTING WITH IT RIGHT NOW  
kingofthecourt: WHERE ARE YOU, IM NOT HIDING ALONE AGAIN

literalsunshine: okay guys meet up at that spot behind the trampolines, all of us  
literalsunshine: we'll sneak out once more people get in here  
v-nikiforov.: this is really intense  
kagamimimi: i missed a lot of what happened because i went to sleep early oops  
kuroko'svanillashake: i saw most of what happened do you want me to recount the tale  
kagamimimi: i can scroll up, thanks

dadchi: OKAY WE'RE OUT  
dadchi: The bus is parked down the block  
dadchi: Suga can you call the busdriver?  
literalsunshine: hes already doing it  
dadchi: One step ahead as always, i shouldnt expect less from my vice captain  
imalwaysthisnice: *wife

dadchi: WHERE ARE TANAKA AND NOYA  
asassy: IF YOU LOST YOUR CHILDREN  
dadchi: F CUKF UDKC DUCIK DUCKD JCD WHGERE ARE THEY  
dadchi: SUGA  
sugamomma: AAAAAAAA THE LAST TIME I REMEMBER SEEING THEM THEY WERE IN THE EMPLOYEE ROOM PUTTING MENTOS IN SOME COKE BOTTLE THEY FOUND  
dadchi: OK 1. WHY DID YOU LET THEM DO THAT  
dadchi: 2. WE LOST OUR CHILDREN AAAAAAAA WERE TERRIBLE PARENTS

ROLLINGTHUNDER: were fine  
yourultimatesenpai: my phone was dead and noya couldnt find his  
yourultimatesenpai: turns out it was in hsi pocket  
yourultimatesenpai: hold the bus for us tho??? where is it  
dadchi: It was just down the block from the park  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: which way  
dadchi: Left?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER:  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: tanaka  
yourultimatesenpai: shiiiiiittttttt

dadchi: HURRY UP HURRY UP THE BUS IS LEAVING  
yourultimatesenpai: WE ARE RURNN ING AS FAST A S WE CAN  
dadchi: RUN FASTER

ROLLINGTHUNDER: we made it  
dadchi: I cannot believe you made a fucking rocket out of the coke bottles and mentos to get on the bus  
dadchi: In hindsight one of us could have just told the busdriver to stop  
literalsunshine: it was too intense a moment for that  
asassy: i almost had a heart attack and i wasnt even there  
yourultimatesenpai: our way was cooler anyway

literalsunshine: well that was fun but lets never do it again  
HOOTIMMAOWL: agreed  
HOOTIMMAOWL: my leg still hurts  
red-faced-sun-ray: my entire body hurts how do you think i feel  
imalwaysthisnice: same  
literalsunshine: my head hurts because SOMEONE threw a coffee mug at my head (not naming names)  
russianblue: sorry  
phichit+chu: this was an adventure for all of us  
TsukishimaKei: climbing on that basketball hoop was the most daring moment of my life  
gucci: you looked really daring tsukki!!!!  
dadchi: That wasnt that daring compared to the other shit that went down  
TsukishimaKei: i know  
gucci: i had fun  
imalwaysthisnice: stfu yamaguchi you were hopped up on coffee the entire time  
gucci: yea lmao  
momfriend: that was terrifying and i wasnt even there  
asassy: makoto do you wanna be "not even there" buddies  
momfriend: 200% yes  
ionlyswimFree: i still like my kiddie pool idea  
momfriend: of course you do  
v-nikiforov.: ahhhh i really wish we were there huh yuuri??  
yuuri_79: what  
yuuri_79: i was sleeping viktor  
v-nikiforov.: you snooze you loose  
yUriwhatthefUck: i hate all of you  
yUriwhatthefUck: but mostly viktor  
grand_king: were taking our team, right iwa-chan??  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: no  
grand_king: of course we are  
puddinghead: hey kuroo did you die  
imalwaysthisnice: maybe  
puddinghead: aw  
puddinghead: thats what you fuckin get  
imalwaysthisnice: hUH  
puddinghead: this is revenge for sneaking up with me when i was playing sara is missing, i told you that already  
HOOTIMMAOWL: im so tired  
dadchi: Maybe we shouldnt have stayed up all night  
shark: did you guys have fun?  
literalsunshine: i think i speak for us all when i say yes  
v-nikiforov.: no  
v-nikiforov.: bc i wasnt there ))):  
phichit+chu: vicchan stop being salty  
v-nikiforov.: i will have as much NaCl as i want to  
yuuri_79: ew science joke

demon_senpai: WHAT THE FUCK  
aone-and-atwo-and-athree: i wouldnt question it if i were you  
bleach: kinky lmao  
demon_senpai: shut the fuck up terushima

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they didnt sleep
> 
>  
> 
> put your favorite line(s) in the comments (mine are at the top of the chap as always)!!!! remember, next chapter is the ~30TH CHAPTER SPECIAL~ so if you have any more suggestions (im not taking more animes, sorry. theres just too many and i dont think all of them will get in!!!) then now is the time to say so!!!!


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (^:

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hinata shrieked.

Hinata awoke one day to find his phone practically exploding. What the fuck could be so important that his friends interrupted one of his rare full-night sleeps?

Pulling his phone off the side-table in disdain, he sighed when he clicked it on and checked his Skype messages. It was only Tanaka and Noya having another Meme War (patent pending) and Daichi yelling at them for it.

literalsunshine renamed the conversation to "MEME WAR 2K16: REVENGE OF 2K16".

The ginger let a crooked smile fall on his face; that was all he was interfering with the chat for right now.

As usual, he called Kageyama (who he wa proud to call his boyfriend) to say good morning.

Hinata only had to wait one ring before Kageyama answered with, "Dear God, Hinata, save me. The memes are too much, I'm dead."

"Oh boy," Hinata chuckled. He hadn't bothered to look at what memes Tanaka and Noya were fucking up Daichi's sleep schedule with today. He didn't think he was going to. He'd have to ask Yachi. "I take it your morning is pretty shitty then?"

He could practically hear Kageyama shrug. "It's fifty-fifty, I guess. How's your's?"

Hinata laughed again and flung the covers off himself. Might as well get dressed and shit while they talked.

"Well, not too shitty. Nothing has really happened yet, I just woke up." He told Kageyama as he dug around for his school shirt.

Kageyama hummed and Hinata took that as a sign to keep going. "I'm just getting dressed right now, so what do you think I should have for brea-"

Hinata shrieked.

"What the fuck?" He could hear Kageyama shouting over the line. "What's wrong with you, dumbass?!"

Hinata sighed and leaned back. "Ahaha... it's a stink bug."

"A what?" His boyfriend's voice dropped in confusion.

"A stink bug, you know? The brown ones that are, like, beetles or some shit, and when you squish them they make the room smell bad?" The bug was looking at him menacingly. He couldn't tell if it was looking at him for sure, really, but he had a feeling. 

"Oh," went Kageyama, "you mean a Halyomorpha halys?"

The ginger paused. "That is the biggest word I've ever heard you use.

"Hey!"

"A what?"

"... That's the scientific name for it. I had to do a project on it, okay?"

Hinata laughed and promptly hung up on his dorky boyfriend. He loved Kageyama, but his big, scientific words were not helpful at the moment.

As he continued to dress himself, he watched the Halyomorpha halys, just to make sire the dumb bug didn't try to attack him or something.

Suddenly, there was a fast rapping at his door. Literally.

"I'm taking this horse by the reigns making redcoats redder with bloodstains!"

"Lafayette?" Hinata answered, surprised.

"And I'm never gonna stop until I make 'em drop and burn 'em up and scatter the remains I'm-"

"Lafayette," Hinata almost sighed.

"Watch me enragin' 'em, engagin' 'em, escapin' 'em, I'm-"

"Natsu." Hinata said.

Natsu let out an exaggerated huff and opened the door. "You're no fun. Mom sent me to fin out why you screamed."

Hinata, personally, felt very offended at this. "I didn't scream!"

"Did too."

"Did not!"

"Did not. Why?" Natsu smile sweetly at him.

"Did too. Because there's a stink bug." Hinata only realized what he'd said once it was too late.

"Really? Where?"

Resignedly, Hinata pointed out the bug. He couldn't believe he'd agreed with his sister!

Only more terror would come, though, and he watched in horror and Natsu made her way over to the stink bug, scooped it into her hand, walked over and opened the window, and dripped the bug outside.

All he could do was weakly call after Natsu, "Don't let mom hear you sing the swears in Hamilton, or she'll have an aneurysm."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember to put your favorite line(s) in the comments as usual!! mine is at the top!


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my favorite lines were every time phichit said "violent me daddy"

v-nikiforov. sent files: [GAY.mp4](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCTy9btvd50)

v-nikiforov.: me  
literalsunshine: youre vladmir putin??  
v-nkiforov.: yes  
literalsunshine: what a coincidence, so am i  
v-nikiforov.: fite me shouyou  
v-nikiforov.: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
v-nikiforov.: ok uh i tried to do that intimidating thing where u call some1 by their last name but like  
v-nikiforov.: yall are japanese and do that anyway,,,  
v-nikiforov.: what the heckie idk what to do )):  
phichit+chu: i think shouyou was the best option to go with  
literalsunshine: i am thoroughly unintimidated oops  
yUriewhatthefUck: WAIT SO WHEN THAT TSUKISHIMA GUY CALLED ME PLISETSKY WAS HE JUST BEING POLITE  
TsukishimaKei: no. im not stupid, i know in other cultures people call each other by their given name, YURI.  
yUriwhatthefUck: AAAGGGHH I HAT E  
literalsunshine: believe me plisetsky so do the rest of us  
yUriwhatthefUck: WAS THAT POLITE???  
literalsunshine: oh sorry no, it was more of a  
literalsunshine: "between you and me kid" way  
yuuri_79: laughs @ yuri because hes the worst son and doesn't care to learn abt other cultures  
yuuri_79: laughs @ him  
yUriwhatthefUck: fuck u  
literalsunshine: [also laughs @ yuri]  
literalsunshine: aaaaaaaaanyway  
literalsunshine: ive been gone for the past day  
literalsunshine: what happened in in this meme war  
yourultimatesenpai: )))); daichi made us clean the gym all month  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: )):  
dadchi: Fuckin meme wars

literalsunshine renamed the conversation to "MEME WAR 2k16 II: DAICHIS REVENGE".

yourultimatesenpai: ooh i love this series  
yourultimatesenpai: i heard in this one daichi dies  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: NO HE WAS SUGAS FAVORITE CHARACTER  
dadchi: If you two don't shut the fuck up youll be cleaning the gym for much longer than a month

ROLLINGTHUNDER: guys thats it  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: im taking this rolling thunder thing to a whole new level  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: im getting a lightening streak in my hair  
yourultimatesenpai: DUDE FRICKING SICK  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: whoooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOY  
dadchi: Noya the rolling thunder thing is getting out of hand let it go  
ROLLINGHUNDER: weve come too far to stop now

puddinghead: its ohaiyo noon  
puddinghead: or ohio noon if ur american  
literalsunshine: kenma none of us are fucking american u shit  
puddinghead: FIGHT ME SHOUYOu  
literalsunshine: why does everyone want to fight me  
HOOTIMMAOWL: hinata fight me too!!! ill buy u a pair of these legging kneepad fucks if u do!!!!!!!!  
literalsunshine: see guys at least bokuto has a good offer  
literalsunshine: ill meet u at our gym bo  
dadchi: No  
literalsunshine: ill meet u at ur gym bo  
HOOTIMMAOWL: fi t e  
keiji: gdi bokuto cant you go one day without being a douche  
HOOTIMMAOWL: wtf im not bein a douche  
dadchi: Yes you are  
keiji: see even daichi agrees w/ me  
HOOTIMMAOWL: daichi agrees with everone  
dadchi: Not true  
HOOTIMMAOWL: revised version *daichi agrees w/ everyone but me  
dadchi: Untrue  
HOOTIMMAOWL: fucking w ow  
literalsunshine: its ok bo ur not a douche  
keiji: stfu hinata  
v-nikiforov.: i dont know whats going on  
yuuri_79: all i can catch is that bokuto is a douche and everyone but hinata agrees  
keiji: exactly  
HOOTIMMAOWL: im hurt keiji  
HOOTIMMAOWL: youve wounded me  
HOOTIMMAOWL: i dont think i can recover from this  
v-nikiforov.: (WTH IS BOKUTO PULLING A COMPLETE VIKTOR NIKIFOROV)  
yuuri_79: (its eerily similar i think he is pulling a vikor nikiforov)  
yUriwhatthefUck: (HAHAHA)  
keiji: stfu bo  
phichit+chu: (ooh cold like the ice we skate on)  
v-nikiforov.: (holy shit thats cold. if u did that yuuri idk what id do)  
yuuri_79: (,,,,,,,,,,)  
keiji: yall know just bc u type it inside parenthesis doesnt mean we cant see it right  
v-nikiforov.: we know  
literalsunshine: stfu keiji let them live their life

THUG: wanna have a pool party  
sugamomma: where did that come from  
momfriend: who knows  
literalsunshine: did someone say pool PARTY

literalsunshine added daddy, madam secretary, haruhoe, CAKEGANGSTA, thing 1, thing 2, mori, and renGAY to the conversation.

dadchi: Hinata i will kill u in ur sleep.  
phichit+chu: violent me daddy  
dadchi: Phichit i will kill u in ur sleep.  
literalsunshine: but they know how to throw parties  
madam secretary: tamaki please change your name its an embarrassment to this club  
daddy: i politely decline your offer  
phichit: politely decline my offer daddy  
daddy: ,,,,,, no?  
THUG: do you guys know how to throw POOL parties tho??  
CAKEGANGSTA: oh dont worry!! we know how to throw all kinds of parties, right mori??  
mori: yea  
makkachin: JEODJDNhujjhjdkskjjjsjjjejsjjjdjjjdjjdjdjjd  
daddy: ???  
v-nikiforov.: OH SHIT sorry thats my dog  
daddy: ??????? that doesnt? clear anything??? up?????????????  
yuuri_79: long story short hes famous and can afford to buy his dog a phone  
daddy: ok kyoYA Lets buy a dog  
daddy: and then  
madam secretary: no  
madam secretary: 1. im pretty sure ouran doesnt allow dogs  
madam secretary: 2. i dont know why you think we have room in the clubs budget to by a dog  
madam secretary: so, the answer is no  
CAKEGANGSTA: aww come on kyoya lets get a puppy!!! ill feed him and play with him and groom him and if hes nice ill let him play with usa-chan!!!  
madam secretary: no  
v-nikiforov.: hi im back  
daddy: you  
daddy: mr. "nikiforov"  
daddy: youre famous?  
v-nikiforov.: hum, well one could call me that yes  
yUriwhatthefUck: (WOW)  
daddy: then how come ive never heard of you?? HMMM? HMMM??????  
russianblue: exCUSE me but that is 5 TIME FIGURE SKATING GRAND PRIX FINALS MEDALIST VIKTOR NIKIFOROV  
daddy: (And it was at that moment when Tamaki knew, he had just gotten himself into a big "Oh shit" moment.)  
v-nikiforov.: ah, so you do know me then?  
daddy: the father son and holy spirit ON A BOAT AMEN WHAT THE FUCK  
madame secretary: what  
daddy: OH NOTHIG WERE JUST TALKING TO ONLY THE MOST BEAUTIFUL HUMAN IN EXISTENCE  
v-nikiforov.: hey now, who said im human  
haruhoe: excuse me tamaki  
daddy: well,,,,,, i mean,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
CAKEGANGSTA: come on haru-chan dont be so uptight!  
ionlyswimFree: im not uptight  
momfriend: haru they didnt mean u  
haruhoe: they meant me. sorry, i should introduce myself, unlike these idiots.  
haruhoe: im haruhi fujioka, its nice to meet you!  
ionlyswimFree: im haruka nanase.  
THUG: wow thats gonna get confusing quick! we need nicknames!  
CAKEGANGSTA: like... like host girl!  
daddy: boy  
CAKEGANGSTA: host boy!  
haruhoe: no  
THUG: and swim boy!  
ionlyswimFree: no  
kingofthecourt: haru give it up everyone calls you that anyway  
literalsunshine: kAGS WHERE HAVE U BEEN  
kingofthecourt: unimportant  
kingofthecourt: do you think there are any corn mazes left from around halloween  
asassy: kageyama,  
kingofthecourt: what  
asassy: its winter  
kingofthecourt: so  
daddy: all the corn is dead

kingofthecornmaze: viva la revolution  
asassy: nO

makkachin: sodksnsksksjjswwwwkkwwkkkwkndnxkdiidjdjjug66689276gy)f55tttt55tggtye6t:y  
v-nikiforov.: nO HOW

yuuri_79: viktor where are you going??  
literalsunshine: ?  
yuuri_79: he just left the ice  
literalsunshine: scroll up

yuuri_79: o hno

thing 1: PREPARE FOR TROUBLE  
thing 2: AND MAKE IT DOUBLE  
daddy: I HATE U TWO  
thing 1: TO PROTECT THE CHAT FROM DEVASTATION  
thing 2: TO UNITE ALL PEOPLES WITHIN THIS CONVERSATION  
thing 1: TO DENOUNCE THE EVILS OF SWIMMING AND HOSTS  
thing 2: TO EXTEN OUR REACH TO THE MEMELORDS WITH THE MOST  
thing 1: HIKARU  
thing 2 KAORU  
thing 1: HE HITACHIIN TWINS MEME OFF AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT  
thing 2: SURRENDER NOW OR PREPARE TO FITE  
renGAY: RENGE  
mori: mori  
literalsunshine: i hate to break it to you, thing 1 and thing 2, but weve already made that meme, we cant give it to you  
thing 1: GOD FUCKING DAMNIT  
thing 2: AAAAAAA  
kingofthecornmaze: that rhymed  
literalsunshime: im aware, my dear kags, my words sounded the same  
literalsunshine: i thought it was clear that was the point of this game..........  
kingofthecornmaze: what why  
literalsunshine: thing 1 and thing 2, from the cat in a hat  
literalsunshine: there couldnt be anything better than that!  
kingofthecornmaze: stop  
literalsunshine: ok  
renGAY: why is this chat names meme war ii: daichis revenge?  
dadchi: Please dont ask

v-nikiforov.: yachi  
yachi: uh????? yes???????????  
v-nikiforov.: youre the manager of their volleyball club right?  
yachi: well uh  
yachi: technically kiyoko is still the manager, but next year itll be me!  
KiyokoS: And I think you'll do great.  
yachi: !!!!!!!!  
v-nikiforov.: ok ok in tsukkis words "diabetes" but yachi i need your help  
yachi: ??????  
TsukishimaKei: dont call me that  
v-nikiforov.: can you please come? ill send you my current hotel address privately  
TsukishimaKei: DONT IGNORE ME  
yachi: uH WELL WHY ME  
v-nikiforov.: you seem very trustworthy  
yachi: UH,,,,,,,,,,  
yuuri_79; dont worry, he wont make a move on u. hes super gay and also were engaged.  
yachi: OHH  
yachi; alright viktor!!

yachi: viktor you are so lucky your fuckin hotel is close  
yachi: im at ur door pls open fucker  
v-nikiforov.: hold up

yachi: JEJSHD WHAT THEBDFUCK??'

literalsunshine: yachi?  
yachi: I CANT TALK RN HNATA IM BUSY  
literalsunshine: uh

yUriwhatthefUck: ok viktor im here open up or ill kco your fucking door down  
v-nikiforov.: hold up

yUriwhattefUck: OH GOD

yuuri_79: ok viktor seriously whats going on  
yuuri_79: which room r u  
v-nikiforov.: cant remember, its a few doors down from yours

yuuri_79: open up bitch  
v-nikiforov.: hold up bitch

yuuri_79: how the fuck  
literalsunshine: ?????????????????

yachi: hello im back  
yachi: the others are still busy its just me  
literalsunshine: yachi whats going on?  
yachi: well uh  
yachi: viktor somehow got a lot of gum in makkachins fur  
yachi: and we were trying to use peanut butter to get it out  
yachi: omg wait yuuris ranting abt it  
yachi: "you dont even like the minty bubblegum viktor! you like the regular flavor!" -yuuri  
yachi: "it was yuris ok! he left it here and i was like 'oh ill just chew it'! i didnt think it would fall out of my mouth, and makkachin just HAPPENED to be there!" -viktor  
yachi: "SO YOU USED PEANUT BUTTWR TO GET IT OUT?!" -yuuri  
yachi: this is hilarious  
literalsunshine: take a video

yachi: yuuri @ viktor rn.mp4  
literalsunshine: SOBBING

yuuri_79: he used PEANUT BUTTER  
yuuri_79: to get YURIS GUM that he CHEWED  
yuuri: out of his DOGS FUR

literalsunshine: so uh  
literalsunshine: remember how i stole a diamond play button  
kagamimimi: oh no  
literalsunshine: wait wait wait just

literalsunshine added markiplier to the conversation.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WOAV WOG WOSV AKAGWHAK  
yourultimatesenpai: i  
dadchi: HINATA  
markiplier: ???  
v-nikiforov.: oh! thats the red haired man isnt it!  
markiplier: yes  
markiplier: your name sounds familiar, do i know you?  
v-nikiforov.: i doubt you know me, but im sure youve heard of me  
v-nikiforov.: look red haired man, i am busy. TAKE IT AWAY LEV  
russianblue: that is 5 TIME FIGURE SKATING GRAND PRIX FINALS MEDALIST VIKTOR NIKIFOROV  
markiplier: oh yeah!! ive herd of him  
yuuri_79: sorry for him. hes trying to get peanut butter out of his dogs fur.  
markiplier: i dont think i wanna know  
markiplier: anyway literalsunshine  
literalsunshine: hinata  
markiplier: hinata  
markiplier: im not mad at you for stealing it  
markiplier: just  
markiplier: /w h y/  
literalsunshine: idk lmao  
markiplier: you dont know  
literalsunshine: no  
markiplier: okay  
markiplier: well  
markiplier: thats all i needed  
markiplier: bye

markiplier left the conversation.

makkachin: hshshdsjhshhhshhshh  
v-nikifrov.: makkachin how do you keep getting ahold of that phone im throwing it away

v-nikifirov.: so my dog is in the waste bin  
kingofthecornmaze: ew u say waste bin? Fite me nikiforov  
v-nikiforov.: meet me @ the closes ice rink fucker well see

v-nikiforov.: SHI T KAGWYAMA I HAVE TO CANCE L OUR FIte  
kingofthecornmaze: too late now, nikiforov

kingoftheconmaze: viktor??

kingofthecornmaze: omf  
literalsunshine: wait let me guess  
literalsunshine: he obliterated you?  
v-nikiforov.: yeah i did  
v-nikiforov.: ON THE ICE  
daddy: u beat him up on the ice? hardcore  
phichit+chu: sounds violent  
dadchi: Dont you fucking dare phichit  
phichit+chu: violent me daddy  
daddy: no  
v-nikiforov.: no i didn't beat him up on the ice  
v-nikiforov.: i tried to cancel our fight because i got caught up with some fans (should have expected it at an ice rink)  
v-nikiforov.: so when he got there and demanded to fight, the fans crowding around me suggested we settle it on the ice  
v-nikiforov.: that is to say, ice skating.  
literalsunshine: oh no  
v-nkiforov.: i didnt realize hed be that bad a skater, though, honest!  
kingofthecornmaze: today i learned i cant stand on ice skates.  
sugamomma: alas, his legs were made for volleyball  
dadchi: At least we have two great setters  
sugamomma: so COLD daichi!! (bu-dum tsss)  
dadchi: life is COLD (bu dum tsss)  
kingofthecornmaze: you two are shitty parents  
v-nikiforov.: i guess u could say theyre  
v-nikiforov.: skating on thin ice  
v-nikiforov.: (bu-dum tsss)  
yuuri_79: i  
yUriwhatthefUck: you two are shitty parents  
literalsunshine: awwww i ship kags and yuri  
kingofthecornmaze: hinata were dating.......  
literalsunshine: ok  
literalsunshine: awwww i ship kags and yuri  
kingofthecornmaze: rud e

dadchi: Everyone whos not on our team needs to leave  
dadchi: Hinata tell them to leave  
literalsunshine: what why me  
dadchi: You added them  
literalsunshine: cant you just, like....... remove them  
dadchi: Well  
dadchi: We could just delete this chat and make a new one  
literalsunshine: idk...........  
THUG: you guys can figure it out in the next chapter!! So much has already happened this chapter and it would suck to end it on a bad note!!!  
momfriend: nagisa what  
THUG: what  
yuuri_79: ........... wtf

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you may have noticed i didnt add all the animes. last chapter was just my april fools prank in december bc i was having trouble adding in all the animes. only added in ouran ri p
> 
> you know the drill, put your favorite line(s) in the comments!
> 
> OH!!!!! yeah, next chap requires audience participation bc idk what to do
> 
> THUG: hey pls look at this strawpoll i made abt next chapter http://www.strawpoll.me/11937048  
> momfriend: NAGISA PLEASE TELL US WTF U ARE TALKIGN ABT  
> yuuri_79: MAKOTO IS HE ON DRUGS  
> literalsunshine: i dont think you want to know the answer to that yuuri


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if i named my chapters this one would be called "kill me" for obvious reasons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> correct me on my other languages if im wrong, im only using google translate hahahahaha
> 
> literalsunshine: "708? no thats my father call me 707"

renGAY: so i believe something is becoming increasingly obvious  
dadchi: ??  
literalsunshine: yes i agree  
grand_king: what  
renGAY: noya  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: uhhhh yes?  
renGAY: i think ur huge crush needs attention  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what crush haha  
renGAY: wow just look at that. he becomes a straight white boy when he denies things.  
renGAY: *not that theres anything wrong with straight white boys, ily straight white boys  
renGAY: anyway theres no need to deny because its rlly apparent  
kagamimimi: renge wtf u werent even here when that stuff happened  
renGAY: i scrolled up  
renGAY: thats a thing you people seem to forget about a lot  
renGAY: *looks at yachi*  
yachi: wtf rude  
dadchi: The truth is rude  
grand_king: wait wait wait  
grand_king: did u say nishinoya has a crush?  
grand_king: who?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ok 1. oikawa just call me noya. literally no one calls me nishinoya in this chat.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: 2. i dont have a crush you guys hahah  
literalsunshine: oikawa he has a crush on asahi  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: no i dont!  
asassy: yes you do  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: asahi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! no i dont!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
v-nikiforov.: noya  
v-nikiforov.: nishi boy  
v-nikiforov.: child  
v-nikiforov.: from a famous ice skater to a highschool volleyball player  
v-nikiforov.: shut the fuck up and face ur feelings  
v-nikiforov.: thanks  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: im going to scream  
yourultimatesenpai: im @ his house rn and i can confirm, he did scream  
yourultimatesenpai: hes also blushing so Success yall

literalsunshine renamed the conversation to "Success yall".

yourultimatesenpai: shut up  
literalsunshine: lmao

707 joined the conversation.

707 added yoo-hoo to the conversation.

dadchi: Hinata do you remember when we were talking about america and someone brought up how back in the 17/8000s they did that shit called tar and feathering  
literalsunshine: ye s???  
dadchi: I want to do that to u  
phichit+chu: violent me daddy  
dadchi: Phichit i want to gouge your eyes out  
phichit+chu: haha and then what (;  
707: i can see this is memey enough w/o me being here but im staying anyway  
literalsunshine: BUT DAICHI I DIDNT ADD 707 IDEK WHO THEY ARE  
dadchi: Sure, jan  
707: i added myself fuckers B)  
yoo-hoo: seven no thats mean dont call them fuckers  
707: *frickers  
literalsunshine: who r u :0  
707: I'm 707. I'm a SuperHacker who Hacked into your Nerd Chat simply for the sake of Hacking it.  
literalsunshine: REALLY :0 :0 :0  
707: lol no  
707: im 707!! u can call me seven if u want but i dont recommend it bc jumin says it only encourages me  
yoo-hoo: and im yoosung  
literalsunshine: encourages u to do what  
707: lololol  
grand_king: why r u here  
707: bc im bored  
yoo-hoo: bc he added me  
v-nikiforov.: does my name look familiar 2 u  
707: no?  
v-nikiforov.: thank god  
yoo-hoo: ... i think i might know it but idk from where  
v-nikiforov.: oh gdi  
russianblue: VIKTOR NIKIFOROV. 5 TIME GOLD MEDALIST IN THE MENS ICE SKATING GRAND PRIX FINALS. BETTER THAN U.  
grand_king: hi seven + yoosung idk u 2 but do u wanna help us expose nishinoya  
707: heck yes  
yoo-hoo: 100%  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: expose me how  
renGAY: oh my god  
renGAY: expose ur massive CRUSH ON ASAHI  
asassy: weve had enough noya pls  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AKESRFDKSDJFGUIFDR NK MCSDFVBC

ROLLINGTHUNDER left the conversation

literalsunshine added ROLLINGTHUNDER to the conversation.

literalsunshine: no one escapes Success yall  
literalsunshine: oh man that felt good, havent done that in a while  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i want to die  
yourultimatesenpai: ur probably gonna w/ how red ur gettin  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: bro pls,,,,,  
yourultimatesenpai: eh  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ),;  
707: how do we expose him  
grand_king: idk lets just keep bothering him  
renGAY: thats what i always do  
daddy: je n'ai jamais demandé cet abus  
literalsunshne: wtf  
renGAY: vous n'avez pas besoin de demander, je livre toujours  
keiji: you know we can translate that right  
renGAY: shut ur dirty mouth  
madam secretary: most of the host club is fluent in french you idiots  
CAKEGANGSTA: including mori, surprisingly  
mori: mmm  
kagamimimi: i feel like mori and kuroko would get along  
kurokosvanillashake: im invisible not quiet  
kagamimimi: well ur quiet too  
kurokosvanillashake: even so, two quiet people wouldnt work together because neither one of us would be willing to talk first  
kagamimimi: ,,,,,,, damn u right  
yuuri_79: HA  
yuuri_79: LITERALLY MY ENTIRE LIFE  
yuuri_79: UP TO WHEN I MET VIKTOR  
v-nikiforov.: !!!  
yuuri_79: BECAUSE HE CANT LEARN THE CONCEPT OF PERSONAL SPACE  
v-nikiforov.: ,,,  
707: 나는 너를 용암 구덩이에 던져 넣고 싶다. 나는 너를보고 싶어. 나는 네가 비명을 질렀을 때 온화하게 미소 지을 것이다. 작별.  
literalsunshine: seven none of us knows what that means  
707: it means "i love you" in korean and i think its beautiful  
literalsunshine: ... sure ok. why did you say i love you??  
707: oh i thought we were just saying stuff in other languages i didnt know we were supposed to actually say something  
v-nikiforov.: Какого хрена ты просто гребаный обо мне говорят, ты, маленькая сука? Я буду иметь вы знаете, я закончил вершину моего класса в Navy Seals, и я принимал участие в многочисленных тайных налетов на Аль-Каиды, и у меня есть более 300 подтвержденных убийств. Я тренировался в гориллы войны, и я верхней снайпер всего вооруженных сил США. Вы никогда ничего для меня, но просто еще одна цель. Я истреблю вас нахуй с точностью, подобных которым никогда не видели раньше на этой Земле, помяните мои гребаные слова. Вы думаете, что вы можете уйти с высказыванием, что дерьмо ко мне через Интернет? Подумайте еще раз, сволочь. Как мы говорим Я обращаюсь к моей секретной сети шпионов через США и ваш IP трассируется прямо сейчас, чтобы вы лучше подготовиться к шторму, личинку. Шторм, который уничтожает жалкий маленькую вещь вы называете вашу жизнь. Ты чертовски мертвым, малыш. Я могу быть в любом месте, в любое время, и я могу убить вас в более семисот способами, и это только с голыми руками. Мало того, я активно тренировался в рукопашном бою, но у меня есть доступ ко всему арсеналу морской пехоты Соединенных Штатов, и я буду использовать его в полной мере, чтобы уничтожить вашу жалкую задницу с лица континента, вы немного дерьма. Если бы вы только знали, что безобразная расплата ваш маленький "умный" комментарий был о том, чтобы обрушить на вас, может быть, вы бы провели свой гребаный язык. Но вы не могли, вы этого не сделали, и теперь вы платите цену, вы проклятый идиот. Я буду срать бешенство все над вами, и вы будете тонуть в нем. Ты чертовски мертв, детка.  
literalsunshine: VIKTOR THE FUCK DOES THAT SAY  
v-nikiforov.: it means ily in russian  
literalsunshine: NO  
yUriwhatthefUck: AHAHAHAHAHAH OH MY FUCKING GOD WHAT THE FUCK IM LITERALLY SOBBINGG GODD AMNIT  
v-nikiforov.: like it  
yUriwhatthefUck: HAHAHhahahHHA  
keiji: no seriously what does it say  
v-nikiforov.: i just put the navy seals copypasta into google translate bc i was too lazy to translate it myself lmao  
literalsunshine: HA  
phichit+chu: ฆ่าฉัน

yourultimatesenpai renamed the conversation to "language party".

literalsunshine: ok phichit enlighten us  
kingofthecornmaze: idek what language that is  
phichit+chu: i thought i told u fucks i was thai  
phichit+chu: anyway it says ily for real this time  
yuuri_79: lies. ik bc u say i love you to me all the time  
yuuri_79: what it say  
phichit+chu: (;  
v-nikiforov.: убей меня  
yuuri_79: OH HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA OK  
yuuri_79: 私を殺して  
daddy: tue-moi  
literalsunshine: jokes on you yuuri provided a translation  
yuuri_79: shit  
yUriwhatthefUck: бля убить меня  
v-nikiforov.: what a potty mouth  
yUriwhatthefUck: viktor youve sworn in this chat too just bc u dont swear in our chat doesnt mean ur perfect  
v-nikiforov.: this chat doesnt count because its a meme chat  
literalsunshine: it wasnt originally intended to be but im glad  
yUriwhatthefUck: fuck you viktor  
v-nikiforov.: thats it im adding jj  
yUriwhatthefUck: NO  
yuuri_79: VIKTOR PLEASE WERE TOO YOUNG  
phichit+chu: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST MIGHT AS WELL ADD CHRIS

v-nikiforov. added kingJJ

kingJJ: JJ-STYLE  
yUriwhatthefUck: god i hate you  
literalsunshine: whos this nerd  
kingJJ: im not a nerd! im the KING!!!!!  
literalsunshine: ew hes unironic abtit  
literalsunshine: *abt it  
kingofthecornmaze: *ab tit  
literalsunshine: why are you like this  
707: what were we doing again  
literalsunshine: idk  
kingJJ: talking about me ;)  
literalsunshine: ew unironic smiley faces  
phichit+chu: haha and then what (;

yuuri_79: viktor u need someone  
v-nikiforov.: i have someone ♥  
yuuri_79: ＳＯＭＥＯＮＥ ＷＨＯ ＭＥＭＥＳ ＹＯＵ ＨＡＲＤ  
v-nikiforov.: im leaving

yoo-hoo: 7070707070707070070707070700707070707  
707: what  
yoo-hoo: LETS ADD JUMIN-HAN AND SEE HOW SHOOK™ HE GETS  
literalsunshine: whos jumin-han

707 added mr. han to the conversation.

mr. han added Elizabeth 3rd to the conversation.

707: FUCK YES ITS ELIZABETH 3RD  
literalsunshine: whos elizabeth 3rd  
mr. han: Elizabeth 3rd is my cat  
mr. han: shes beautiful  
707: agree  
v-nikiforov.: 3rd of what  
v-nikiforov.: what even is 3  
literalsunshine: HAHAHAHAH FUCKIN  
v-nikiforov.: работа работа Элиза  
yUriwhatthefUck: почему ты такой  
daddy: shut up with your foreign language  
literlasunshine: says the guy who was speakin french a minute ago

mr. han left the conversation.

literalsunshine added mr. han to the conversation.

literalsunshine: no one escapes language party  
mr. han: 707 i hate you  
707: ♥ u too lololol  
mr. han: im leaving

v-nikiforov.: pls look at this good pic of me  
v-nikiforov.: [me thanks.png](http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/yurionice/images/0/09/B_e_a_u_ty.png/revision/latest/thumbnail-down/width/985/height/553?cb=20161120065303)  
yuuri_79: AAAAAAAAAAAA YOUNG VIKTOR??? YES SIGN ME UP  
v-nikiforov.: u absolute fanboy  
yuuri_79: i thought u knew i had like 300 posters of u and also that body pillow  
yUriwhatthefUck: gross  
v-nikiforov.: well yes i did but  
v-nikiforov.: look i can call u a fanboy if i want to  
v-nikiforov.: also i found another one look its more recent  
v-nikiforov.: [wink.png](http://i.imgur.com/ZzxcmeT.png)  
v-nikiforov.: look im wink  
v-nikiforov.: подмигивать  
707: WOAH HE LOOKS KINDA HOT. LIKE IF ZEN AND V HAD A BABY  
yoo-hoo: SEVEN

v-nikiforov.: YURUI  
v-nikiforov.: ELT S HAVE A SLEEPOVEr  
yuuri_79: are you drunk  
v-nikiforov.: WTHATS NOT THE queSTION  
v-nikiforov.: COME LETS HAVE A SLEEPVOER  
yuuri_79: viktor were engaged we sleep in the same bed anyway  
v-nikiforov.: ):

haruhoe: i think everyone in this chat requires therapy  
707: tru

literalsunshine: here look im gonna be 707 for a sec  
literalsunshine: "708? no thats my father call me 707"  
707: [SPITS OUT DRINK] LOLOLOLOL

renGAY: gdi noya  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what  
renGAY: how did u escape our interrogation of ur incredibly large crush on asahi  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i didnt  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: 707 came in and was like  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: "and that! is how! you pivot!"  
v-nikiforov.: he pivoted  
707: speaking of

707 added jaehee to the conversation.

Jaehee: God, I wanna stab you.  
707: lolol  
literalsunshine: ew propor capitalization and punctuation  
jaehee: Is there a problem?  
literalsunshine: not really it just looks  
literalsunshine: wrong  
literalsunshine: in this chat  
KiyokoS: Finally, someone else who's sane.  
yachi: !!!!!! :,0  
KiyokoS: Sorry, Yachi. But you're just as much of a meme as anyone else here.  
yachi: ): tru  
Jaehee: I wouldn't say I'm sane. Not after working for Mr. Han and, um. Elizabeth 3rd.  
mr. han: shhhhhh jsut lat tit hapen  
kingofthecornmaze: tit  
mr. han: SHSHSHSHSHHhshshHSHSHhh  
707: lolol jumin u drunk??  
mr. han: thats not important rn  
mr. han: seven i need u to come over rn  
707: uh?????????????????  
707: why  
mr. han: u watch elizabeth 3rd im leavin g bye  
707: oH MY GOD YES MY DREAMS COME TRUE  
mr. han: im gonna go be gay with zen  
707: isnt zen allergic to cats and doesnt he also hate you a lil bit there  
mr. han: itks ifne  
707: but...... u got elizabeth 3rd's fur all over u  
mr: han: its fien  
literalsunshine: omg why is everyone drunk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for a short chapter im lazy  
> i already wrote this chapter but a lot of it got cut off (idk why it didnt have the less than sign?????) so i wrote something else
> 
> the mystic messenger bois wont be here for long and i wont add anymore bc i cant write them even in a crackfic like this  
> i hate yoosung idk why
> 
> as always put ur fave line(s) in the comments! mine are at the top!!!


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short chapter because fuck you (: (: (: jkjkjkjk ily all thanks for the support!
> 
> sugamomma: anyway apparently he broke his ankle  
> yourultimatesenpai: WHAT THE FUCK HOW ARE WE GONNA PLAY VOLLEYBALL

literalsunshine renamed the conversation to "NOYA #EXPOSED"

literalsunshine: ok fuckers  
literalsunshine: todays the day  
literalsunshine: we worked hard to get to this place  
literalsunshine: and we are not gonna let anything distract us  
literalsunshine: ladies, gentlemen, other  
literalsunshine: today were gonna fuckin #expose noya  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: oko kok okok ok NORMALL y i would fucking cor e ect u (i dont have a crush) but fickking guess what

ROLLINGTHUNDER added trumpmeister to the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: its fucking donald trump  
literalsunshine: noya you asshole thats a bot  
kingofthecornmaze: *dumbass  
literalsunshine: shut the fuck up kageyama thats your stupid word  
trumpmeister: Wow, every poll said I won the debate last night. Great honer!  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yea but its a hilarious bot AMIRITE  
literalsunshine: no get it out of here  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ): no  
literalsunshine: shut the fuck up and confess to asahi  
asassy: im dying waiting for u noyo  
asassy: *NOYA OMG  
literalsunshine: OH SHIT HSIT SHTISHITHSTIHSITH SIHTISHT SITH SITHI  
literalsunshine: FUCK  
literalsunshine: DAICHI AND SUGA PLS COME TO THE GYM RN U NEED U  
sugamomma: whats wrong? is everything okay?  
literalsunshine: UM YEAH IDK KAGEYAMAS JUST FUCKING STARTED SCREAMING AND I RAN OVER AND HES LIKE  
literalsunshine: IDFK GET OVER HERE RN  
v-nikiforov.: what  
v-nikiforov.: can i come  
yuuri_79: viktor you cant just  
yuuri_79: whatever go to their gym i dont care anymore  
yUriwhatthefUck: VIKTOR WERE IN RUSSIA RN U WERE SITTING ON OUR COUCH 3 SECONDS AGO AND NOW UR PACKIGN WHATS GOING ON  
v-nikiforov.: youd be surprised how fast you can get places when youre a 5 time gold medalist

sugamomma: SO HERES AN UPDATE ON OUR DEAR SON KAGEYAMA  
sugamomma: DAICHIS BUSY TELLING THE SECRETARY WHO WE ARE RELATED TO KAGEYAMA I JUST SNUCK BACK HEYY  
sugamomma: so he like  
sugamomma: idk what they were doing but they had the net weird  
sugamomma: so it was like, a tennis net  
sugamomma: and i guess he jumped over it? thats what hinata told me anyway  
sugamomma: and hinata said thats what kageyama told him  
sugamomma: anyway apparently he broke his ankle  
yourultimatesenpai: WHAT THE FUCK HOW ARE WE GONNA PLAY VOLLEYBALL  
sugamomma: thats something for another day tanaka  
v-nikiforov.: i just arrived tell me what hospital u at  
sugamomma: in private messages  
sugamomma: dont want the whole team coming because the nurse in here said like 3 min ago that we cant have more than like, 4 people in here  
sugamomma: and youll be 4  
yourultimatesenpai: we just want to support him in his time of need  
sugamomma: stfu tanaka u jsut want food from their vending machines  
yourultimatesenpai: how dare you,,,, accuse me of such,,,,,,, dirty underhanded intentions that is,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, untrue  
ennoSHITa: FUCKIN HELL MY PHONE HASNT BEEN WORKING JESUS HELL FUKCING CRHIST SHIT  
ennoSHITa: anyway whats going on  
sugamomma: kageyama broke his ankle  
ennoSHITa: do i wanna know  
sugamomma: probably not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi  
> thanks for reading  
> put your fave line(s) in the comments  
> mine are at the top
> 
> THUG: i wasnt in this chapter!!!! :D  
> literalsunshine: everyone wants to kill you  
> momfriend: untrue  
> THUG: anyway please vote on this!! http://www.strawpoll.me/12080143


	34. Chapter 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> suddenly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> literalsunshine: BAKAGEYAMA TOSS TO ME  
> kingofthecornmaze: i  
> kingofthecornmaze: wait this feels kinda deja-vu  
> literalsunshine: so you're not gonna toss to me?  
> kingofthecornmaze: hinata  
> kingofthecornmaze: my anke is broken

literalsunshine renamed this conversation to "Karasuno Team Chat".

literalsunshine: BAKAGEYAMA TOSS TO ME  
kingofthecornmaze: i  
kingofthecornmaze: wait this feels kinda deja-vu  
literalsunshine: so you're not gonna toss to me?  
kingofthecornmaze: hinata  
kingofthecornmaze: my anke is broken  
sugamommma: why  
dadchi: Why what  
sugamomma: why is his ankle broken  
literalsunshine: suga are you Serious  
dadchi: Thats the second time ive ever seen hinata capitalize anything  
literalsunshine: well actually im generally sure youve seen me capitalize things many times  
sugamomma: rip  
yourultimatesenpai: huuuh this is nostalgic  
asassy: ?  
yourulitamesenpai: maybe ill steal noyas phone this time  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wtf rude  
v-nikiforov.: why is this nostalgic  
literalsunshine: hECK  
literalsunshine: HE WASNT HERE FOR THIS  
yourultimatesenpai: fuck it im stealing noyas phone  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i s2g tanaka  
asassy: why do i even hang out with you people  
v-nikiforov.: WHY IS THIS NOSTALGIC SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: I HATE TANAKA  
yourultimatesenpai: you love me  
literalsunshine: wait  
literalsunshine: WIAT  
literalsunshine: WE KEEP FORGETTING TO #EXPOSE NOYA  
asassy: jfc hinata

literalsunshine: ok wait everyone shut up for a sec  
gucchi: none of us were saying anything  
literalsunshine: i am going to expose noya if its the last thing i do  
dadchi: Hinata have you ever thought that maybe noya didnt want to be exposed  
literalsunshine: *#EXPOSED  
literalsunshine: and he doesnt have a say in it  
literalsunshine: its becoming painful to watch  
literalsunshine: and asahi already knows anyway he makes it so fuckin obvious by watching him during practice  
dadchi: True  
asassy: lmao,,,,,,,  
literalsunshine: aw shit son he really needs to become wise  
sugamomma: hinata you're grounded stop trying to #EXPOSe noya  
hinata: UGH  
dadchi: Hinata listen to your mother  
literalsunshine: ok

literalsunshine: ok where tf is kageyama hes doing the Thing again  
kingofthecornmaze: MY ANKLE IS BROKEN YOU FUCK  
literalsunshine: gdi  
literalsunshine: meet Kageyama Pablo, professional ANKLE BREAKER  
literalsunshine: sighs  
kingofthecornmaze: no  
gucci: lmfao  
TsukishimaKei: yama pls dont associate urself with these memes  
gucci: what

grand_king: you kjnwo whats fuikcin hterrible  
707: me  
grand_king: no noobdy FUC KIFN cares baout you seven man  
literalsunshine: omg oikawa dont tell me ur drunk  
grand_king: dont you dfuckign patronciaze me shrimpy  
literalsunshine: gdi can everyone stop getting drunk  
grand_king: anyway  
grand_kind: yopu knwo whats FUCKIGN terrible  
grand_king: iwaizumi is  
grand_king: and hes fuckign stupid and mean ands rude and hie wont KISS ME IM SO ANGRY  
literalsunshine: oikawa #EXPOSED  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: are you kidding me  
keishin_ukai: you know what i think is dumb  
literalsunshine: STOP WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN  
sugamomma: what coach  
literalsunshine: NO SUGA WHY  
kingofthecornmaze: hey you know what i think is stupid  
literlasunshine: WHY  
grand_king: AND THEN HE HAS THE AUD A C I T Y to caLL ME A DUIMBAASS WHAT EVEN THE FUCK IM SO ANGRYYYYYYY  
kingofthecornmaze: ew oikawa. ok guys my problems can wait bye

kingofthecornmaze left the conversation.

literalsunshine added kindofthecornmaze to the conversation.

literlausnshine: no one escapes Karasuno Team Chat  
sugamomma: dang how long has it been since youve said that hinata  
literalsunshine: too long  
grand_king: DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND  
ennoSHITa: GUYS IM FUCKING TRYING TO SLEEP CAN YOU STOP FUCKIGN AROUND  
dadchi: WOAH thats the real deja-vu here  
yuuri_79: i know you guys probably dont care but phichits eyebrows are on fleek today  
phichit+chu: (;  
NotShittykawa'sBoyfriend: oikawa chill  
grand_king: YOU KNWO WHAT FUCK YOU  
literalsunshine: maybe we should do a reality television show Hell's Kitchen-Big Brother style removal of all these people  
literalsunshine: and the last person wins a volleyball  
dadchi: Were not giving away any of our volleyballs theyre provided by the school  
literalsunshine: damnit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: FUCK OKAY SO I FORGOT KAGEYMAA BROKE HIS ANGKLE BUT DONT WORRY I DEDITITED IT ITS ALL GOOD GUYS
> 
> tell me ur fave line(s), mine are at the top!!


	35. Chapter 35

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> well hello there strangers  
> its been a while huh  
> [sweats]
> 
> anyway yes i totally stole the "o-kei" thing from the haikyuu cosplay series "supernatural" on youtube (YOU SHOULD GO CHECK IT OUT???? ITS SO GOOD)
> 
> god bless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> v-nikiforov.: shhhhh le tit happen  
> phichit+chu: tit  
> 707: tit  
> sugamomma: tit  
> literalsunshine: tit  
> ROLLINGTHUNDER: tit  
> yourultimatesenpai: tit  
> Jaehee: Tit.  
> 707: OMG SHE DID IT THE ABSOLUTE MADWOMAN  
> v-nikiforov.: сиська  
> yUriwhatthefUck: im fucking leaving

literalsunshine: yep thats it someone push daichi off a cliff  
sugamomma: why would you even suggest that  
literalsunshine: throw him off a cliff  
literalsunshine: punt him to space  
literalsunshine: drop kick him into an incinerator  
literalsunshine: electrocute him  
kingofthecornmaze: guys i just want to play volleyball has it been 6 weeks yet  
literalsunshine: drown him  
sugamomma: well i see where this teams priorities lie and they do not lie in a very nice place  
dadchi: What did i ever DO to you hinata  
literalsunshine: fuckign shtu uP IM TALKING "C""CAPTAIN " " " ""'  
dadchi: Rude  
literalsunshine: YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE  
literalsunshine: YOU IMPOSE ON MY KAGEYAMA  
literalsunshine: YOU IMPOSE ON ME  
literalsunshine: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE  
sugamomma: hinata youre grounded  
sugamomma: we should really re-implement that "no swearing unless ur a 3rd year or i say you can" rule  
yourultimatesenpai: actually,, i think,,,,,,,,, that is a very unfair rule,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what if  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and this is just a suggestion  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what if only the 1st yrs are not allowed to swear  
yourultimatesenpai: bro thats the best idea ive ever heard  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: bro  
yourultimatesenpai: bro  
v-nikiforov.: but im not an anything year  
v-nikiforov.: im 27  
707: im 22  
yuuri_79: im 23  
phichit+chu: why are we just telling everyone our age  
v-nikiforov.: shhhhh le tit happen  
phichit+chu: tit  
707: tit  
sugamomma: tit  
literalsunshine: tit  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: tit  
yourultimatesenpai: tit  
Jaehee: Tit.  
707: OMG SHE DID IT THE ABSOLUTE MADWOMAN  
v-nikiforov.: сиська  
yUriwhatthefUck: im fucking leaving

v-nikiforov. renamed the conversation to "сиська".

v-nikiforov.: сиська

yUriwhatthefUck left the conversation.

literalsunshine: wtf rude

literalsunshine added yUriwhatthefUck to the conversation.

literalsunshine: no one escapes сиська  
yUriwhatthefUck: Я ненавижу эту чертову дс так много  
v-nikiforov.: rt  
v-nikiforov.: its a gr8 gc but rt  
yuuri_79: brb killing myself over the use of "rt"  
v-nikiforov.: ))):   
пожалуйста, не детка, я люблю тебя )))):  
yUriwhatthefUck: brb killing myself over the use of "детка"  
THUG: i would just like to point out that nobody here kjnows what the fuck youre saying  
red-faced-sun-ray: no one knows what YOURE saying u bitch  
yuuri_79: YOOOOOOO  
literalsunshine: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
mom friend: FUCKIN HELL YOOOO WRECKED BY A 8 YR OLD NAGISA  
red-faced-sun-ray: im 17  
mom friend: well maybe you should have brought that up when we were all telling our ages did you ever think of that you tit  
literalsunshine: makoto is savage  
CAKEGANGSTA: im here to protect my fellow boys wtf is going on  
red-faced-sun-ray: god bless  
THUG: rt ^^^  
red-faced-sun-ray: lets make a club m'boys  
THUG: yes

(CAKEGANGSTA added red-faced-sun-ray and THUG to the conversation.

CAKEGANGSTA renamed the conversation to "m'boy club".

red-faced-sun-ray: we are blessed with the lookds of 8 yr olds  
THUG: rt)

yuuri_79: drinking game take a shot every time someone says rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt

(THUG: rt  
CAKEGANGSTA: nagisa ur gonna get kicked out of the club if u say that again  
red-faced-sun-ray: rt)

literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt

(red-faced-sun-rt: im proud of myself  
CAKEGANGSTA: omg we should all put rt in our names  
CAKERT: blessed  
THUG: what do i do  
CAKERT: just change ur name to rt  
THUG: wait  
THRTUG: there  
CAKERT: you knwo what it works so  
red-faced-sun-rt: it doesnt actually but its fuckin funny so)

literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
literalsunshine: rt  
dadchi: Hinata if you dont stop youre gonna be the one being drop kicked into an incinerator  
phichit+chu: violent me daddy  
v-nikiforov.: ^^rt  
dadchi: Get out phichit  
phichit+chu: rt  
707: retweet more like  
707: retit  
literalsunshine: tit  
phichit+chu: tit

(CAKERT: i wish rt stood for retit  
red-faced-sun-rt: rt  
THRTUG: rt)

kingofthecornmaze: tit  
yachi: tit  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: tit  
TsukishimaKei: if you implement the "only first years cant swear" what will we do  
gucci: we could fake swear  
TsukishimaKei: what like "sugar" instead of shit  
sugamomma: dont you sugar me im the only sugar allowed here  
TsukishimaKei: did you just call yourself shit  
sugamomma: FUCK  
yUriwhatthefUck: ew that kei dude is back  
TsukishimaKei: ew that russian fairy is back  
yUriwhatthefUck: CAN YOU BELIEVE THE AUDACITY  
literalsunshine: i feel like if yuri and tsukki didnt hate each other theyd be friends  
TsukishimaKei: well isnt that like, the opposite of hating anyway  
TsukishimaKei: also dont call me tsukki that is a nickname reserved for Yamaguchi Only, no shrimps allowed  
literalsunshine: YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE  
literalsunshine: YOU IMPOSE ON YURI  
literalsunshine: YOU IMPOSE ON MY HEIGHT  
literalsunshine: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE

(CAKERT: YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE  
CAKERT: YOU IMPOSE ON MY RT  
CAKERT: YOU IMPOSE ON MY TIT  
CAKERT: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE)

v-nikiforov.: can we make that a meme please  
literalsunshine: YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE  
literalsunshine: YOU IMPOSE ON ME  
literalsunshine: YOU IMPOSE ON MY MEMES  
literalsunshine: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE

thing 1: hey tsukishima  
Tsukishima: .................................................... who the fuck  
thing 2: yea weve been here like the entire time  
thing 1: ANYway like i was saying  
thing 1: tuskishiam  
thing 2: omg u messed that up so bad  
thing 1: shut up  
thing 1: tsukishima  
TsukishimaKei: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT  
gucci: so short tempered  
TsukishimaKei: SHUIT UP HEATHER  
gucci: sorry heather  
thing 1: are you o-KEI  
TsukishimaKei: ,  
thing 1: O-KEI  
thing 1: get it  
TsukishimaKei: yes i get it  
thing 1: ARE YOU  
thing 1: O-KEI

(red-faced-sun-rt: i dont think hes o-kei i think his jimmies are v rustled)

TsukishimaKei: i get it you can stop  
thing 1: ARE YOU  
thing 1: O-  
TsukishimaKei: someone remove this abomination  
thing 1: KEI  
thing 1: ARE YOU O-KEI  
TsukishimaKei: shut the fuck up  
thing 2: you know what hikaru  
thing 1: what  
thing 2: i dont think hes  
TsukishimaKei: stop  
thing 2: O-KEI

(red-faced-sun-rt: bless)

thing 1: im just asking if hes  
TsukishimaKei: i hate this  
thing 1: O-KEI

literalsunshine renamed the conversation to "O-KEI".

TsukishimaKei: brb killing myself over the use of "o-kei"  
gucci: TSUkkI NOo  
TsukishimaKei: shut UP yamaguchi  
gucci: sorry tsukki

yuuri_79: after the final lets end this  
v-nikiforov.: unfollowed, blocked, reported, uninvited to my 9th bday party  
literalsunshine: i thought u were 27  
v-nikiforov.: uninvited to my 9th bday party

(CAKERT: literally same tho viktor  
red-faced-sun-rt: rt  
THRTUG: rt)

red-faced-sun-rt: rt  
yuuri_79: minami why is rt in the place of ray  
red-faced-sun-rt: you dont know my life  
yuuri_79: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,

literalsunshine: i forgot why i was mad at daichi  
dadchi: You were mad at me???  
literalsunshine: "literalsunshine: yep thats it someone push daichi off a cliff  
sugamomma: why would you even suggest that  
literalsunshine: throw him off a cliff  
literalsunshine: punt him to space  
literalsunshine: drop kick him into an incinerator  
literalsunshine: electrocute him  
kingofthecornmaze: guys i just want to play volleyball has it been 6 weeks yet  
literalsunshine: drown him" -me, earlier  
dadchi: Oh

literalsunshine: SOMEONE BUY ME AIR TREKKERS  
kingofthecornmaze: what are air trekkers  
literalsunshine: kageyama, my sweet summer child  
kingofthecornmaze: i was born in december  
literalsunshine: shhhhhhh  
literalsunshine: air trekkers are only THE BEST THING,E VER  
literalsunshine: RUN FASTER, JUMP HEIGHEER  
literalsunshine: THEYRE LIKE VOLLEYBALL STILTS  
TsukishimaKei: and obviously you need them since youre so short  
literalsunshine: TSUKISHIMA ANY OTHER TIME ID BE MAD BUT YES, FUCKIKNG YES, I NEED THEM SO M UCHA AA A A A A A AAA AA A AAA A AA AAAA A  
TsukishimaKei: okay, calm your tit  
thing 1: o-kei  
thing 2: o-kei  
phichit+chu: tit  
CAKERT: rt

ROLLINGTHUNDER: HEY FUCKIERS I RELALY REALY LOVE ASAHIIIIII I I I I I II I I I I II I I II  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: HAVE U EVER ,LOO K E D A T ASAHI ? ? HES SO HOT  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ALSO HE S I THE SWETEST MAN I HAV E ENVER MET  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: AND HI E IS BA TUIFUL AND I LOVE HIM  
asassy: i am shook  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ASAH IU1!!!!!!!! ILYS M AS AHI ILY A LTLO  
literalsunshine: noya are you drunk  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: DRUN K OF F MY LO VE FOR A SAH I IL Y SM ASA HI  
yourultimatesenpai: he only had two drinks and look at him  
yourultimatesenpai: hes a mess  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 ASAHI IS GOO D  
sugamomma: well at least he admitted his big gay crush  
renGAY: finally  
literalsunshine: rt  
asahi: rt  
yourultimatesenpai: rt  
renGAY: rt more like  
renGAY: quote tweet  
literalsunshine: god bless  
yourultimatesenpai: brb getting noya some coffee so he sobers the fuck up

literalsunshine: do u think kageyama would toss to me if i bribed him  
kingofthecornmaze: OH SURE let me just TAKE MY FUCKING CAST OFF AND JUMP RIGHT UP just to fucking TOSS TO YOU  
kingofthecornmaze: SURE  
literalsunshine: cool can u be at the gym in like 10 minutes  
kingofthecornmaze: shut the fuck up you dumbass i was being sarcastic  
v-nikiforov.: savage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading my dudes B^)
> 
> as always leave your favorite lines in the comments, mine are at the top!!!


	36. Chapter 36

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> is this chapter just me reusing jokes from my twitter? yes  
> is that a good reason to plug myself? no  
> am i going to plug myself anyway? yes  
> please follow me on twitter (tori_is_a_nerd) all i tweet about is viktuuri and yoi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yourultimatesenapi: nishinoya, yuu've already fufilled enou  
> ROLLINGTHUNDER: BRO NICE ONE  
> yourultimatesenpai: THANKS BRO

literalsunshine: dakimakura  
literalsunshine: what a wonderful phrase  
literalsunshine: dakimakura  
literalsunshine: aint no passin phase  
sugamomma: it meaNS NO WORRIED  
sugamomma: FOR THE REST OF YOUR DAYYYYYYYYYYYS  
literalsunshine: ITS OUR PROBLEM FREE  
sugamomma: DEMOCRACY  
sugamomma: oimfg autocorrect i thought i turned you off ******philosophy  
literalsunshine: IM SOBBIN G  
literalsunshine: THERE ARE ACTUAL TEARS  
v-nikiforov.: what does dakimakura mean  
yuuri_79: viktor you know pillow yuuri  
v-nikiforov.: yea  
yuuri_79: hes a dakimakura  
v-nikiforov.: OOOHHHHHHHH  
literalsunshine: do i want to know about pillow yuuri  
yuuri_79: no  
v-nikiforov.: OF COURSE HE WANTS TO KNOW ABOUT PILLOW YUURI  
yuuri_79: hinata its just a pillow of me in a skating costume from last season do not listen to what he tells you about pillow yuuri plea s e  
v-nikiforov.: pillow yuuri is my best friend and he sleeps with me when yuuri makes me sleep on the couch  
v-nikiforov.: and pillow yuuri is a great listener  
v-nikiforov.: just likke yuuri  
v-nikiforov.: and pillow yuuri goes on walks with me sometimes  
yuuri_79: VIKTOR dont tell me you take that thing outside  
v-nikiforov.: yuuri how many times have i told you dont be mean to pillow yuuri hes a pillow with a heart of glass and youll hurt his feelings  
yuuri_79: very funny now im gonna go fucking BURN PILLOW YUURI  
v-nikiforov.: YUURI NO

literalsunshine: theyve been gone for nearly half an hour should i be worried  
yUriwhatthefUck: i wouldnt  
literalsunshine: yeah but youre mean  
yUriwhatthefUck: ))))):  
yUriwhatthefUck: so what exactly is a dakimakura for  
literalsunshine: why r u askign me  
yUriwhathefUck: id k pl sjus t an s w e r  
literalsunshine: they 4 cuddleing  
literalsunshine: of in pillow yuuris case, theyre what best friends are for  
phichit+chu: and yuuri acts like pillow viktor isnt a thing  
literalsunshine: lmfao

literalsunshine: id buy a kageyama dakimakura  
kingofthecornmaze: whats the point when u have the real thing  
literalsunshine: kageyama do not call pillow kageyama worthless  
kingofthecornmaze: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
kingofthecornmaze: hinata u better not have just ordered one  
literalsunshine: (;

red-faced-sun-rt: have you ever seen yuuri  
v-nikiforov.: yes hes my husband  
red-faced-sun-rt: ik im so jealous ),;  
red-faced-sun-rt: hes so beautiful and cute and fluffy and aaaaaaaaaaaa i love yuuri  
v-nikiforov.: I ALSO LOVE YUURI!!!!  
phichit+chu: like...... yall know the way he huffs when he cant do something???  
red-faced-sun-rt: YES  
v-nikiforov.: OM G YE S  
phichit+chu: ugghgghhhhh 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i dont even know how the timeline of this fic works dont even ask me
> 
> put your favorite line(s) in the comments, mine are at the top as always!!!


	37. Chapter 37

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so folks i regr e t to inform you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2015 was wild
> 
>  
> 
> hinatit: also how many times do i have to fucking say it my name is hinatit now you broken fucking clavicle  
> v-nikiforov.: what

hinatit: so you may have noticed my name is better now  
kingofthecornmaze: what the fuck hinata  
hinatit: no kags its hinatit now  
kingofthecornmaze: i hate you  
hinatit: ),;  
CAKERT: wait i thought we were doing rt themed names  
red-faced-sun-rt: do we have to change our names now  
THRTUG: please god my name is fucking terrible  
CAKERT: hey you piece of shit ur like 8 dont fucking swear

hinatit: HOLD THE TIT  
kingofthecornmaze: hinata you might wanna rephrase that  
hinatit: kageyama did i fucking stutter

dadchi: Why does most of this chat consist of tit based conversation  
sugamomma: you dont like the tits daichi???  
dadchi: Suga im fucking gay  
sugamomma: that doesnt mean you cant objectively appreciate tits  
dadchi: Sleep on the couch tonight  
sugamomma: damn i got couchzoned

dadchi renamed the conversation to "tit based conversation".

 

hinatit: my friends brothers name is naegi and i feel like hes naegi makoto but im too afraid to ask  
mom friend: im makoto  
ionlyswimFree: no one asked you makoto  
kingofthecornmaze: HARU YOU DUMBASS YOU CANT SAY THAT TO YOUR MOM  
ionlyswimFree: kageyama you dumbass you cant swear it me im like 6  
red-faced-sun-rt: haruka im like 8 i can be ur big bro  
ionlyswimFree: ok  
mom friend: and im your mother  
sugamomma: and im makotos mother  
ennoSHITa: and im the mother-in-training  
kingofthecornmaze: why do i put up with this chat  
hinatit: becuse you love me  
kingofthecornmaze: bad reason  
hinatit: FUCKING RUDE

asassy: why you gotta be so ruuude  
hinatit: FUCK NO ASAHI DONT  
asassy: dont you know im human tooo  
hinatit: THAT SONGS FROM LIKE FUCKING 2015 NO  
kingofthecornmaze: who remembers summertime sadness  
asassy: i do  
hinatit: NO FUCK DONT DO IT ASAHI IM SO YOUNG I CANT DIE YET  
kingofthecornmaze: put the lyrics  
hinatit: DO N T  
asassy: i got that summertime  
asassy: summertime sadness  
asassy: x2

hinatit left the conversation.

kingofthecornmaze: wait  
sugamomma: WHAT NO HINATA  
v-nikiforov.: BUT WHOS GONNA ADD HIM BACK AND FORCE HIM TO SUFFER IF HE LEFT  
TsukishimaO'Kei: i really hate to be distraught over shrimpy but ITS NOT THE SAME IF SOMEONE ELSE DOES IT  
asassy: FUCK THIS IS ALL MY FAULT FUCK DUCK FUCK FUCK CUCKSNCINDICJDJDJDNDJS  
kagamimimi: IT WAS TOO SOON  
kagamimimi: IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME INSTEAD  
kagamimimi: HE WAS SO YOUNG HE HAD SO MICH TO LIVE FOR  
kagamimimi: I REMEMER HIDING HIM FROM THE COPS WHEN HE STOLE THAT DIAMOND PLAY BUTTON  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: hey i hate to bring down the mood but kagami  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i guess you should say it sould have been "kagaMI" instead  
youltimatesenpai: BROOO  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: BROOOO  
kagamimimi: i hate you  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: rude  
asassy: why you gotta be so ruuude  
dadchi: NO ASAHI NOT AGAIN THAT KILLED OUR TENTHBORN SON  
sugamomma: ASAHI  
asassy: SORRY I COULDNT HELP IT  
kingofthecornmaze: QUICK SOMEONE ADD HIM BACK

ROLLINGTHUNDER added hinatit to the conversation.

hinatit: hit it yachi  
yachi: SO WHATD I MISS  
yachi: WHATD I MISS  
yachi: KARASUNO MY CHAT SWEET CHAT IWANNNA GIVE YOU A KISS  
hinatit: mwah  
kingofthecornmaze: HINATA THANK GOD YOURE BACK  
hinatit: yeah hi  
v-nikiforov.: NEVER LEAVE US AGAIN HINATA EVERYTHING WENT TO SHIT WHILE YOU WERE GONE  
hinatit: well duh i created this chat. there is no order without a memer like me  
hinatit: also how many times do i have to fucking say it my name is hinatit now you broken fucking clavicle  
v-nikiforov.: what

yuuri_79: VIKTOR LEND ME SOME MONEY  
v-nikiforov.: why  
yuuri_79: DONT QUESTION ME  
v-nikiforov.: yuuri you never ask for money unless you wanna buy something pricy and the only pricy things you buy are me merch so spit it out  
yuuri_79: BUT VIKTOR THE NEW FIGURE OF U IS SO PERFECT  
yuuri_79: THE ASS ON THAT THING IS BETTER THEN IRL  
v-nikiforov.: ...... damnit hes right

hinatit: viktor how do you and yuuri have fights  
v-nikiforov.: pardon  
hinatit: like does yuuri slip into japanese when you fight  
v-nikiforov.: yes  
yuuri_79: ya whenever i call him baka he responds with "bucket?" because he hasnt fucking learned japanese  
v-nikiforov.: please someone tell me what it means  
hinatit: kageyama dont call me dumbass anymore please i prefer bucket  
kingofthecornmaze: are you asking me to call you a baka  
hinatit: yes but do it while being tsun  
kingofthecornmaze: s-stupid hinata b-bucket........ i-its not like i like to t-tods for you or anything!!!  
kingofthecornmaze: howd i do  
hinatit: 8.9  
yuuri_79: 10  
yuuri_79: rude hinata  
asassy: WHY YOU GOTT A B E S O  
sugamomma: NO ASAHI WE JUST GOT OUR TENTHBORN SON BACK DONT KILL HIM AGAIN  
asassy: I CANT CONTROL MYSELF ANYMORE ITS LIKE MY HANDS ARE TYPING BUT I CANT STOP  
imalwaysthisnice: well i think we learned an important lesson here today, folks.  
hinatit: what??  
imalwaysthisnice: dont be fucking rude  
v-nikiforov.: PLEASE WHAT THE FUCK DOES BUCKET MEAN

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i got that summertime summertime sadness
> 
> sorry for long waits between updates (that rhymed) school is fucking me in the ass lately and i rlly need to say the safeword  
> that was a strange comparison and ill never use it again im sorry
> 
> anyway you know the drill, leave your favorite line(s) in the comments!!! mine are at the top!!


	38. Chapter 38

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> and u thought noya would never get his redemption arc

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys im back with another dhit chap
> 
>  
> 
> here are my fave lines
> 
> dadchi: Just like molly cyrus  
> hinatit: m  
> hinatit: molly cyrus?????  
> dadchi: Yeah you know  
> dadchi: Jessie Tennessee

ROLLINGTHUNDER: im literally going to cry then kms  
hinatit: what why  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i just realized i drunkenly confessed to asahi  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: **not that there was anything to confess  
hinatit: the correct term is #EXPOSED  
hinatit: but noya, buddy, that happened like three (3) days ago my man.  
asassy: im going to cry too if noya keeps denying his crush  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what crush lol  
asassy: brb crying  
renGAY: oh my fuCKING GOD ARE YPU SERIOUS NOYA  
renGAY: YOU ALREADY CONFESSED YOU PIECE OF SHIT GET YOUR LIFE TOGETHER  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i didnt "confess" anything  
renGAY: yes you did  
hinatit: yes you did  
dadchi: Yes you did  
asassy: yes you did  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: stop ganging up on me  
ROLLINGTHUNDEE: anyways, i was drunk. i didnt "confess" anything  
asassy: noya literally you said you loved me so much like seven (7) times  
707: did someone say seven  
asassy: 707 please explain to nota why hes an idiot  
707: you were just talking to him a second ago, why dont you just tell him  
asassy: were fighting  
grand_king: you know who im fighting? all of u. ill see u bichs in court.  
asasssy: oikawa thank god. youre good at provoking people  
hinatit: *#EXPOSING  
grand_king: thats true, but my services come with a price. if you want me to #EXPOSENOYA, you need to pay up.  
asassy: name your price  
grand_king: hmmmm... well lets make this a lil difficult. make iwa-chan kiss me!  
imalwaysthisnice: YO if this were irl hed be winking @ u  
grand_king: yep! thats my price!  
v-nikiforov.: WOAH THERE BUDDY THIS IS THE SPICIEST  
v-nikiforov.: let me recap real quick bc i m an old man with a bad memory  
yuuri_79: viktor youre 28  
v-nikiforov.: let me have this you tit  
hinatit: tit  
renGAY: tit  
yuuri_79: tit  
grand_king: tit  
v-nikiforov.: tit (;  
red-faced-sun-rt: rt  
THRTUG: rt  
CAKERT: rt  
phichit+chu: rt  
v-nikiforov.: anyway let me recap  
v-nikiforov.: noya wants to die bc hes thirsting for asahis d  
asassy: please dont put it like that  
v-nikiforov.: everyone wants to #EXPOSE noya  
v-nikiforov.: asahi is salty so hes conspiring with oikawa, who will be seeing us all in court  
asassy: did you just call me salty??? im not salty tsukishima is  
TsukishimaO'Kei: listen asahi i only bully hinata and kageyama do you really want me to bully you too  
asassy: no sorry  
TsukishimaO'Kei: thats what i fuckin thought  
v-nikiforov.: oikawa is also pining @ iwa-chan so he requires a price  
v-nikiforov.: and the price is getting iwa-chan to kiss him?  
yuuri_79: good summary viktor  
v-nikiforov.: (:  
grand_king: im not pining lol ..  
hinatit: OH HELL HES JUST LIKE NOYA HE BECOMES A STRAIGHT WHITE BOY  
hinatit: *no offence to straight white boys yall cool  
hinatit: but not oikawa  
grand_king: fucking rude  
asassy: y u gotta b so ruuuuuuude  
grand_king: ill see u in court dick (:  
asassy: oikawa your price is not possible i cant  
grand_king: how sad!  
hinatit: hes like monokuma............  
asassy: OIKAWA  
grand_king: whaaaaaat?  
asassy: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
dadchi: Oikawa stop making our son have a panic attack  
sugamomma: yea das rude  
asassy: why ya gotta be so ruuuuuude  
hinatit: stop

(asassy: uh  
asassy: hi  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: ??????? new phone lol who dis  
asassy: um?  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: lol leave a message afTGhhjdkkelslalalbb sbwnwbs bnbwbnwbsn  
asassy: UM???????????????  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: sorry. kindaichi is an asshole what do you need azumane-san  
asassy: uh well  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: you seem nervous is it about oikawa  
asassy: ????????  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: people are usually nervous when they talk to me about oikawa and i always get two types of people  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: 1. people wondering if hes single  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: or 2. people who want to face him in volleyball)

TsukishimaO'Kei: everythings quiet and when its quiet im suspicious  
hinatit: would you rather the chat be a mess like usual  
TsukishimaO'Kei: never mind

(asassy: well uh  
assasy: im not either of those  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: ahh, i get it  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: youre the forbidden number 3  
asassy: ??  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: 3. the people who are doing oikawa a "favor" or paying his "price"  
asassy: ahaha..... um, yeah, sorry  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: well, sorry, but im not going to kiss him. whatever youre paying for, you can probably figure it out, yeah?  
asassy: NO!  
asassy: i mean only THE GRAND KING has the level of #EXPOSING needed to expose noya!  
NotOikawa'sGirlfriend: that makes me glad i muted that chat.)

hinatit renamed the conversation to "#EXPOSE NOYA 2.0 2K17".

hinatit: lets expose this tit  
v-nikiforov.: rt  
dadchi: Please Dont Bring Rt Back  
phichit+chu: rt  
dadchi: PHICHIT DONT MAKE ME KICK YOU  
dadchi: and if you say "violence me daddy" youre d e a d  
phichit+chu: oh no! scary! what should i do yuuri?  
yuuri_79: SAY IT YOU BICH  
dadchi: NO  
phichit+chu: ahem  
phichit+chu: Inflict pain on my physical being, father.  
daddy: its like that meme where you take a simple sentence and make it more complex  
phichit+chu: If you would be so kind, male parental figure, administer torment upon my corporeal form.  
daddy: this meme makes me live  
phichit+chu: rt  
dadchi: I hate you all. I get no sleep, my phone keeps me up all night. For some reason, you all seem to torture me during the day, too. It's like an unending whirlpool, spinning me deeper and deeper until I have been consumed by the sea of memes. Hinata Shouyou is truly a demonic boy, an usurper of power.  
hinatit: rt  
phichit+chu: rt  
renGAY: quote tweet, lol tru  
daddy: like tweet  
hinatit: reply to tweet, hi daichi  
dadchi: what even is this anymore  
dadchi: i thought we were exposing noyas thirsty ass  
kingofthecornmaze: daichi whered your typing quirk go  
hinatit: shut the fuck up kageyama  
THRTUG: yeah homestuck was so chapter 5  
THRTUG: man that was a lot of chapters ago  
kingofthecornmaze: what  
Momkoto: nagisa, on behalf of everyone here, shut the fuck up. no one knows what ur talking about  
THRTUG: [subtle wink at readers]  
hinatit: that wasnt subtle  
THRTUG: (;  
hinatit: stop  
hinatit: asahi where are you we need to expose noya  
asassy: IWAIZUMI WONT HELP ME  
grand_king: um, duh. ya gotta make him.  
asassy: I CANT  
grand_king: y?  
asassy: im a soft spoken weak willed anxiety ridden person oikawa what am i SUPPOSED to do  
grand_king: just??? make him??????? idk get kageyama to do it he likes kageyama  
kingofthecornmaze: no way  
grand_king: and WHY not  
kingofthecornmaze: because helping asahi would mean paying your "price" whixh means helping u. and i dont like u  
kingofthecornmaze: sorry asahi  
grand_king: ?!?!!!?!?!?!?! WHAT DID I DO WRONF  
kingofthecornmaze: uh idk, just traumatized me i guess  
kingofthecornmaze: you piece of shit  
grand_king: well i guess if youre gonna hit it........  
HOOTIMMAOWL: KUROO GET THE CAM E RA  
imalwaysthisnice: IM SCREENSHOTTING RAPILDLY BO  
grand_king: hit it until it breaks  
imalwaysthisnice: WOOIOOOOOOODJSKSKSJSNSNS  
HOOTIMMAOWL: YES  
HOOTIMMAOWL: HE SAID IT  
kingodthecornmaze: i hate you

hinatit: how do we keep veering this off topic  
THRTUG: ik makoto told me to shut the fuck up but yeah this #EXPOSE   
NOYA thing has been going on for a good amount of chapters  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: have u ever thought about nishinoyas feelings in all this  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: maybe he doesnt wanna be #EXPOSED  
yourultimatesenpai: noya. brother. bro. my boi. nishinoya. homie. just let it go my guy.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: but  
yourultimatesenpai: no  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ):  
hinatit: pls buddy you just gotta confess your ~ t h i r s t ~ for asahi  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
asassy: please nishinoya its getting painful to watch  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ,,,,,,,,  
707: incredibly painful  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ,,,  
707: just stop  
707: or, actually.....  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ASAHI I HAVE A BIG GAY CRUSH ON YOU  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: NO oh my gOD AAAA THAT WASNT ME I DIDNT TYPE THat  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WGAT THeFUCK JUST HAPPENED  
707: there we go (:  
yoohoosung: 707 DID YOU JUST HACK THAT CHILD OH MY GOD  
707: AHAHAHAHA YEAH  
yoohoosung: IM TELLING JUMIN  
707: whats jumin gonna do  
yoohoosung; IM TELLING JAEHEE  
707: NO  
Jaehee: Jaehee already knows.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: YOURE A HA C K E R???? ? ??? ?? ??????  
707: how do you think i got into this chat  
hinatit: BUT YOU SAID YOU WERENT A HACKER YOU SAID THAT WAS A JOKE  
707: and thats why you dont believe everything you see on the internet, kids  
hinatit: my whole life is a lie  
707: (;  
kingofthecornmaze: wait, but youre such a meme! i thought hackers were supposed to be creepy and steal all your information  
707: well believe me, i know everything about you all. not like its stuff i care abt tho  
hinatit: rude  
707: idk yoosung do you think its possible to be both a hacker and a meme?  
yoohoosung: well youre example 1  
707: thats the nicest thing youve ever said to me  
hinatit: are you a hacker too yoosung :0  
yoohoosung: nah  
kingofhecornmaze: what about jumin?  
707: nope, hes a trust fund kid. i dont think he knows how to work a computer  
KiyokoS: What about Jaehee?  
Jaehee: Hardly. I'm the assistant to Mr. Han.  
hinatit: :0 so seven is a hacker  
707: ye  
hinatit: whats your real name?????? its not 707 is it?  
707: uh  
kingofthecornmaze: HINATA YOU DUMBASS YOU DONT ASK A HACKER THAT  
hinatit: THEN WHAT DO I ASK A HACKER, "HOWS THE WEATHER?"  
707: the weather is pretty nice actually but i gotta stay inside all day im supposed to be hacking shit rn  
707: but im not im just chillin  
707: procrastinating  
707: #EXPOSINGNOYA  
hinatit: shit we gotta expose him  
hinatit: noya please just tell asahi how you feel  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: WELL WATCH THE SMOKE POUR OUT THE DOORS  
hinatit: no  
hinatit: nononponononp ur not tricking. Me with this  
hinatit: briNG MARSHMALLOWS WELL MAKE SMORES WE CAN SMILE AND CUDDLE WHILE THE FIRE ROARS I WAS MEANT TO BR YOU WEE ALL THAT I NEED UOU CARVED OPEN MY HEART CANT JSIT LEVE ME TO BLEED VERONICA OPEN THW OPWN THE DOOR PLEASE VERONICA OPEN THE DOOR VERONICA CN WE NOT DIGHT ANYMORW PLS CAN ER NOT DIGHT ANYMORE VERONIC SURE YOURE SCARED IVEN BEEN THERE I CAN SET U FREE VERONICA PLEASE LET ME ET IN THERE IM GONNA COU T TO THREE ONE TO FUCK IT OH MT GOD VERONICA NONPLEQSE DONT LEAVE ME ALONE YOU WERE ALL INCOULD TRUST I CANT DO THIS ALONE STILL I WILL IF INMUAT VERONICA I BROUGHT U A SNACK VERONIC? AAAAAAAAAAAA  
v-nikiforov.: AND THAT! IS HOW! YOU PIVOT!

yachi: Yee Haw Babes  
v-nikiforov.: dasvidaniya  
yachi: )))):  
yachi: what did i ever do to YOu vikir  
yachi: i was there for u when u gor gum atuck in your dogs fur  
yachi: when were you there for me  
v-nikiforov.: you got me there  
yuuri_79: you were there for her when you got gum stuck in your dogs fur  
v-nikiforov.: yes yachi i was there for you when i gor gum stick in my dogs fur  
707: i wasnt here for this even and i wish i was because it sounds fuckin hilarious ))).;

707: hey 707  
707: yes???? ehat iait???? 797????  
707: do u think we could use the custom emotes we made here?  
707: why, ehat a brilluant idea seven oh seven!!!!  
707: the answer is  
707:   
707: apparently not  
707: fine ill just  
707: [sevwn angry emote]  
hinatit: this has been 707 talking to himself  
707: ahut up hinata dont try to shame me  
hinatit: rude  
asassy: w h y u g o t t a b e s o r u d e  
hinatit: asahi youre out of the band  
asassy: ):

daddy: you know what, this place is in need of some comic relief  
daddy: AND WHOS THE BEST COMIC RELIEF???  
mommykyoya: you  
daddy: n o, US  
mommykyoya: right ok  
daddy: you know what kyoya take your saltiness and shove it up your ass  
mommykyoya: I BEG YOUR PARDON  
daddy: ill see you in court  
mommykyoya: ohh noooo, what will you do, big bad tamaki? im soo scarrreeeeddd  
mommykyoya: what are you gonna do, sue me?  
daddy: yes.  
mommykyoya: oh sHIT

demon_senpai: IM GOING TO KICK LEVA ASS  
demon_senpai: KUROO I KNOW YOU KNOW WHERE HE IS  
imalwaysthisnice: untrue  
imalwaysthisnice: also why are you using this chat we have our own you know  
demon_senpai: which is more active  
imalwaysthisnice: you got me there  
hinatit: what did he do  
demon_senpai: UAUAURDKDKEJDDJNSHSHAH  
demon_senpai: THE BASTARD BOUGHT ME STILTS  
hinatit: ooh low blow  
hinatit: get it  
hinatit: cause youre short  
demon_senpai: hinata youre shorter than me  
hinatit: by 1 cm  
demon_senpai: well.  
puddinghead: i saw him leave the gym  
imalwaysthisnice: WTF PRACTICE JUST STARTED GO GET HIM KENMA  
puddinghead: nah yakus got it covered

hinatit: guys its been a couple hours is everything ok?  
imalwaysthisnice: were making "lost lev posters  
hinatit: ok  
hinatit: why  
imalwaysthisnice: we lost him  
hinatit: HOW  
hinatit: HES SO TALL  
imalwaysthisnice: hinata idk if you just think tall people can sense each other or if youre just really stupid  
hinatit: honestly its probably both  
imalwaysthisnice: hinata to you he may stick out like,,,,, like a really tall person but hes only slightly taller than me, therefore not that interesting  
imalwaysthisnice: irs all about perspective  
puddinghead: idk if you noticed kuro but most people here are shorter than you  
TsukishimaO'Kei: im the 1%  
v-nikiforov.: 2% milk  
yuuri_79: why is that the first thought you had  
v-niiforov: idk its the Best Milk  
plisetskymorelilepissoffsky: you fool 1% is obviously the Superior Milk  
yuuri_79: i like whole milk  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: no one asked you pig  
yuuri_79: OKAY GUYS THATS THE FIRST TIME HE CALLED ME A PIG (IN THIS CHAt)  
yuuri_79: pig count: 1  
v-nikiforov: duck off guys 2% is your god bow mortals  
red-faced-sun-rt: you idiots yuuri is right  
red-faced-sun-rt: whole milk is fucking god  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: fuck you you condiment hair sunset shimmer lookin piece of shit  
THRTUG: remember when the author was scared of offending people with this fic  
imalwaysthisnice: ................. anyway lev  
russianblue: what  
demon_senpai: YOU PIECE OF SHIT WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU   
russinblue: F UCK  
demon_senpai: YOU MADE US SO WORRIED NEVER RUN AWAY AGAIN  
hinatit: gasp  
hinatit: yaku-san really is like a mother  
imalwaysthisnice: i told you, didnt i?  
puddinghead: i have a feeling you only added that honorific to get on his good side  
hinatit: (;  
russianblue: IM SORRY YAKU-SNA I DIDNT MEAN TO MAKE YOU WORRIED  
demon_senpai: you know what, whatever, its fine. where are you?  
russianblue: texas  
demon_senpai: LEV EHAT THE FUXK  
russiablue: KIDDING KIDDING IM SORRYYYY  
russianblue: im @ kagamis house  
kagamimimj: confirmed  
kagamimimi: i already hid a criminal. hiding levs not much worse.  
v-nikiforov.: TAG URSELF IM LEV  
russianblue: im also lev  
hinatit: im kagami  
red-faced-sun-rt: literally same  
kagamimimj: well not literally but ok  
kingofthecornmaze: im the stilts lev bought  
707: im yaku  
hinatit: quote tweet, same  
russianblue: like tweet  
renGAY: rt  
russianblue: i wont make you worried anymore tho yaku-san  
hinatit: gay  
v-nikiforov.: gay  
707: gay  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: gay  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: gay  
asassy: nishinoya you honestly do not have the right to say gay after refusing to be #EXPOSED  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i came here to have fun and im honestly feeling so attacked right now  
asassy: bring out the 2012 tumblr memes lol  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: do you even know if thats 2013  
asassy: i have no idea but my main point is shut up  
hinatit: the one time that "because shut up" is a reasonable argument  
kingofthecornmaze: hinata i feel like youre pandering to the humor  
hinatit: im not  
russianblue: am i pandering to the humor kageyama-san  
hinatit: does he regard everyone with -san  
imalwaysthisnice: unfortunately  
HOOTIMMAOWL: lev is nice but weird  
HOOTIMMAOWL: and tall lmao  
russianblue: thanks  
hinatit: Alright Alright Alright  
yachi: thats what im talkin about a toast to the groom to the groom to the hro to the groom to the bride to the bride to the briiiiiiiide  
hinatit: no  
hinatit: Can We Get Back To Exposing Noya  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: no

707: 707 more like  
707: $0$  
hinatit: sauce  
asassy: sos  
kingofthecourt: 5sos  
v-nikiforov.: 505  
asassy: 5sos more like  
asassy: 1d  
hinatit: conspiracy theory 707 is 1d  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: five (5) sauces  
asassy: five (5) sosses  
yourultimatesenpai: tosses  
hinatit: KAGEYAMA TODS FOR ME  
kingofthecornmaze: weve come full circle  
asassy: motion to change 707s name to seven (7) zero (0) seven (7)  
asassy: all for say yea all against say nay  
hinatit: yea  
v-niliforov.: yea  
707: nay  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yea  
yourultimatesenpai: yea  
kingofthecornmaze: yea  
THRTUG: nay  
dadchi: Yea  
sugamomma: yea  
TsukishimaKei: nay  
hinatit: why do those who oppose say nay  
TsukishimaKei: because thats fucking stupid  
707: because 707 is my NAME stop trying to change it  
THRTUG: because the author doesnt wanna type that over and over again  
Momkoto: shut up nagisa  
THRTUG: shut up mom  
dadchi: Dont talk to your mother that way  
THRTUG: youre not my real dad ):  
kingofthecornmaze: yeah. nahisas daddy is Rei  
leavemealone: i beg your pardon???? bich?????? ill be seeing you in court  
THRTUG: *sweats*  
hinatit: excUse me??? ( : sweaty????? ( : u cant say that to him ( : hes only 7 sweaty ( :  
THRTUG: full disclosure i have thought abt calling rei daddy befoe just to try it  
THRTUG: havent done it tho  
leavemealone: please god what sins have i committed that caused this to happen  
hinatit: this is beautifully disgusting  
kingofthecornmaze: thats an oxymoron  
hinatit: youre an oxymoron  
kingofthecoenmaze: dumbass  
v-nikiforov.: break oxymoron stereotypes  
hinatit: ANYWAY THROUGH MAJORITY RULE 707 HAS TO CHANGE HIS NAME TO SEVEN (7) ZERO (0) SEVEN (7)  
707: risiculous  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): RIDICULOUS  
asassy: HE DID IT THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): i hate myself  
hinatit: rt  
phichit+chu: rt  
yuuri_79: rt  
asassy: rt  
THRTUG: quote tweet, same  
daddy: quote tweet, me  
asassy: like tweet  
hinatit: like tweet  
hinatit: unlike tweet  
hinatit: like tweet  
hinatit: unlike tweet  
asassy: rt again  
hinatit: like tweet  
asassy: follow  
hinatit: unlike tweet  
hinatit: like tweet  
hinatit: unlike tweet  
hinatit: follow  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): stop  
daddy: reply to tweet, like tweet unlike tweet  
hinatit: llke tweet  
daddy: reply to reply, (:  
dadchi: Its just like real twitter folks  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): no  
dadchi: Seven do you understand sarcasm  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): kinda  
dadchi: Just like molly cyrus  
hinatit: m  
hinatit: molly cyrus?????  
dadchi: Yeah you know  
dadchi: Jessie Tennessee  
hinatit: HAHAHA OH MY GOD  
sugamomma: DAICHI ARE YOU SERIOUS  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: PETITION TO CHANGE DAICHIS NAME TO JESSIE TENNESSEE ALL FOR SAY YEA ALL AGAINST SAY NAY  
hinatit: YEA  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): YEA  
sugamomma: YEA  
daddy: YEA  
dadchi: NAY NAY  
dadchi: ET TU SUGA???  
sugamomma: YEA x10000000  
yourultimatesenpai: IM SOBBING YEA  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: YEA  
dadchi: I THOUHT WE WERE #EXPOSING NOYA  
hinatit: THAT WONT WORK THIS TIME DAICHI JESSIE TENNESSEE IS BETTER  
sugamomma: her name FYI DAICHI, is hannah montana/miley cyrus  
hinatit: oh my god i cant breathe  
hinatit: daichi you gotta change your name  
dadchi: Fucking no  
hinatit: suga  
sugamomma: i gochu bich  
dadchi: Suga dont you fuckinh dare so help me or ilanwllslakLkJjNdkfkdkdklekxxllxl kdskslle  
dadchi: Ekkekffkfkdkldpdodkdksodkdkd  
Jessie Tennessee: I hate you suga  
sugamomma: *kiss emoji*

hinatit: noya can you please just stop being a little bitch and confess to asahi  
hinatit: youve already given a drunk one now give a sober one you little underage drinker you  
hinatit: were all rlly tired of this pls noya  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: lol do u wanna die today hinata  
hinatit: yes please  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: um. why dont i confess to kiyoko?  
hinatit: well first of all theres nothing   
close to romantic there. unrequited maybe, platonic YES, but theres no bond like that.  
hinatit: and second of all theres someone else who comes first  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: mayonnaise  
hinatit: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cN9Xhtb345w  
Jessie Tennessee: Hinata you responded very quickly to have gone and looked for that video  
Jessie Tennessee: Which only leads me to believe that you 1. have that link bookmarked and ready for an occasion like this  
Jessie Tennessee: Or 2. know that link by heart, which is ultimately the most suspicious  
hinatit: let a man live his life daichi  
sugamomma: i don't think you classify as a man  
TsukishimaO'Kei; pfft, yeah, more like a shrimp  
Jessie Tennessee: Actually hes more of a boy than man or shrimp  
hinatit: theyre bullying me  
kingofhecornmaze: hes small and i love him  
Jessie Tennessee: Thats gay  
sugamomma: daichi i hate to break it to you but Youre Gay  
Jessie Tennessee: But that doesnt mean i cant call them gay  
v-nikiforov.: thats true  
hinatit: viktor why do you find now to be an appropriate time to join the conversation  
v-nikiforov.: i just came back from practice dont bully me  
hinatit: if youre gonna come here and agree with daichi aka Jessie Tenessee then i think you should leave  
v-nikiforov.: now whos bullying who  
hinatit: nope youre still bulling me  
v-nikiforov.: let the gays be free to do what they want  
hinatit: viktor im in a gay relationship with my gay boyfriend, kaGAYama  
kingofthecornmaze: wtf  
v-nikiforov.: no The Gays have disowned you please gather your things and leave //hands you brown box  
hinatit: yes boss i understand sir [takes brown box and goes to desk to put my forty-two (42) staplers in it] damn budget cuts  
Jessie Tennessee: What the fuck is wrong with you people  
sugamomma: theres nothing wrong with them daichi. its nepotism at its finest.  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): lame, its nepotism  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): ooh deja vu  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): tho isnt my life deja vu? *laughs and shares a subtle but hearty and good natured wink with the readers*  
Momkoto: its not subtle, none of this is subtle  
THRTUG: //winks  
Momkoto: stop

grand_king: kms (:  
hinatit: why does everyone want to kill themselves lately  
hinatit: theres no reason for that  
grand_king: had to watch my nephew ok  
hinatit: ok  
grand_king: and i was humming right  
hinatit: yes ok ok  
grand_king: it was just a random tune yes?  
hinatit: mhm right  
grand_king: so my nephew goes  
grand_king: "is that the naruto theme"  
grand_king: i had half a mind to lock him outside  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): lololol dont hesitate when you feel the urge to lock people outside just do it  
yourultimatesenpai: JUST DO IT  
yourultimatesenpai: DONLT LET YOUR DREAMS BE DREAMS  
hinatit: guys stop bringing back old memes  
sugamomma: I Can Be Your Angle  
sugamomma: Or Yuor Devil  
hinatit: that doesnt count, its a classic and will never get old  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what about ended friendship with x, y is my best friend now  
hinatit: timeless  
v-nikiforov.: what about YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE  
hinatit: thats not a meme thats me  
v-nikiforov.: john cena  
hinatit: n o

ROLLINGTHUNDER: asahi  
asassy: what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: um. i think you guys were right this whole time  
v-nikiforov.: (do my dear old eyes deceive me)  
yuuri_79: (viktor. youre 28.)  
v-nikiforov.: (shut ur fuck)  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: abt me having a crush on you. i just  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: didnt want to admit it  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: because im really nervous, i was scared youd reject me or something  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: because you were all making fun of me and i didnt know what to do  
hinatit: noya nooo!! we werent making fun of you  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: well it seemed that way  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and im still rlly scared so please say something before i legit kms  
asassy: sorry sorry!!!!!  
asassy: im just  
asassy: surprised i guess  
asassy: i wasnt actually expecting you to confess  
renGAY: yeah none of us were.  
daddy: shut up renge  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: so um  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: do you accept my feelings  
asassy: of course i do!  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: omg... im so hOAKAOAOLkkk  
asassy: wh  
asassy: what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: TANAKA JUST KICKED THE DOOR DOWN  
asassy: ??????  
yourultimatesenpai: I KNEW IT  
yourultimatesenpai: HES CRYING HAPPY BOY TEARS  
asassy: omg  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: dont TELL them!!!!!  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: omg  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: please god asahi before tanaka drags me off to celebrate or whatever  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i love you  
asassy: love you too  
TsukishimaO'Kei: diabetes  
hinatit: rt  
phichit+chu: rt  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): like tweet  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): quote tweet, lololololol theyre gay  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): reply to tweet, its so sweet it gave me diabetes  
TsukishimaO'Kei: reply to reply, yes that was the point of my caption  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): reply to reply, fuck yoU

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gay
> 
> pls put ur fave line(s) in the comments if u have any!! mine are at the top as usual!
> 
>  
> 
> also shoutout to an anon who has nicknamed me Big Papa P, Pinktortilla, Pinktortia, and Pinktotit
> 
> im half upset that theres no Pinktort


	39. it's been fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's been fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been fun

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been fun


	40. Chapter 40

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> no special chap this go yall  
> im so lazy and so tired

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fave line:

yoohoosung: hinata rmember when you asked if i was a hacker  
hinatit: yes  
yoohoosung: i changed my mind i am now  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): yoosung just because you gave yourself super op stuff in LOLOL doesnt mean youre a hacker  
yoohoosung: stop crushing my dreams sveven  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): im 70.7% sure you couldnt do half the stuff that i do lololololol  
red-faced-sun-rt: 70.7%  
hinatit: whats LOLOL  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): shIT  
yoohoosung: pardon me  
yoohoosung: pardon. me.  
yoohoosung: DID YOU REALLY  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): i dont even wanna get into this  
hinatit: y????  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): lets just say LOLOL is this online game that yoosungs super into and leave it at that okay  
hinatit: ok  
yoohoosung: NOKAY  
yoohoosung: LOLOL IS ONLT THE THE MOST STRIKING TURN OF THE CENTURY MMORPG EVER CREATED  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): do you know what half of that means  
yoohoosung: shut up  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): rude  
asassy: why yo u go tt a b e s o r u u. U uu uui de  
hinatit: stop

HOOTIMMAOWL: [me with that gay shit](http://68.media.tumblr.com/aa0b0ae164f8f836bb978f883e4b9d1f/tumblr_inline_n7lbswd6hM1r3pv3i.png)  
HOOTIMMAOWL: yum yum  
hinatit: can i have some  
HOOTIMMAOWL: no its mine  
HOOTIMMAOWL: mmmmm  
hinatit: ),;  
kingofthecornmaze: stop making my boyfriend sad bokuto  
kingofthecornmaze: i acknowledge your superior knee pads and/or leggings  
kingofthecornmaze: or whatever they are  
kingofthecornmaze: so acknowledge his feelings  
hinatit: yeah and give me some of that gay shit while you're at it  
kingofthecornmaze: B)  
HOOTIMMAOWL: you kniw what i didnt come here to get told off by twwo 6 yr olds so fuck off  
asassy: JESUS bokuto is a SASS MACHIN  
E  
hinatit: i just wanted some of that gay shit bo  
HOOTIMMAOWL: NO  
HOOTIMMAOWL: YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO CALL ME THAT  
HOOTIMMAOWL: YOU COME TO ME  
HOOTIMMAOWL: ON THE DAY OF MY FRIEND OIKAWAS WEDDING WEDDING  
grand_king: im getting married? to whom'st've'nt's'ya'll'd??  
grand_king: i hope its iwa-chan  
HOOTIMMAOWL: ASKING FOR THAT GAY SHIT  
HOOTIMMAOWL: NO  
HOOTIMMAOWL: KISS MY LEGGING KNEE PADS  
hinatit: RUDE  
assasy: why  
assasy: you  
assasy: gotta  
hinatit: st o p  
asassy: be  
asassy: so  
hinatit: wh y  
asassy: ru u u u uu uuuu uu u uu ude  
hinatit: i hope your ears bleed the next time you listen to that  
asassy: i dont listen to it tho  
hinatit: still

ennoSHITa: tanaka  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: lol hes busy what do u need  
ennoSHITa: damnit the one day hes not on is the day i actually pay attention to this chat  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: hell be back soon  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what do you need  
ennoSHITa: nothing  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: suuure lololol  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): glad to see my lolololol trait passed on lol

kingofthecornmaze: yachi is soulja boy  
hinatit: aw fuck. i cant believe youve done this.  
kingofthecornmaze: ?  
hinatit: -aw fuck  
ennoSHITa: why are you like this  
hinatit: shut up you have no reason to be rude to me  
asassy: W H Y Y O U G O T T A B E S O R U D E  
hinatit: oh, fuck off with that

kingofthecornmaze: i hate public transport  
Jesse Tennessee: Why not  
kingofthecornmaze: today this lady with a sack of flour sat next to me on the bus looking very angry even though there were free seats,,,,  
sugamomma: why didnt you ask her to move  
kingofthecornmaze: because it it felt impolite  
hinatit: um, whens the last time you swore me out again  
kingofthecornmaze: well thats different dumbass  
hinatit: WHAAAAAT  
hinatit: HOW  
kingofthecornmaze: well  
kingofthecornmaze: youre my boyfriend  
TsukishimaO'Kei: im gonna stop you there by saying diabetes  
kingofthecornmaze: im gonna stop you right there by saying shut the fuck up  
hinatit: tobio aint takin any of your shit  
gucci: stop bullying tall boy ):  
TsukishimaO'Kei: d  
TsukishimaO'Kei: did you just call me tall boy  
gucci: yes  
TsukishimaO'Kei:  
TsukishimaO'Kei: well  
TsukishimaO'Kei: alright  
hinatit: hes so dumbfounded he doesnt even know what to say  
TsukishimaO'Kei: SHUT THE HELL UP  
hinatit: hes so dumbfounded he doesnt even know what to say except for that

hinatit: hmmm how about we..... VIDEO CALL  
Jesse Tennessee: Please god no  
v-nikiforov.: omg yes!!!! i rlly wanna know how some of you sound (;  
hinatit: me? (;  
v-nikiforov.: i already know what you sound like  
hinatit: me (;  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: I CAN SHOW EVWRYONE MY ROLLING THUNDER MOVE  
imalwaysthisnice: anyone who has played you in volleyball ever has seen it  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: no but  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: has minami seen it  
red-faced-sun-rt: yes, actually!!! at the trampoline park remember?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: no ):  
asassy: noya give up everyones seen rolling thunder  
v-nikiforov.: not i  
asassy: nO VIKTOR SHH WHY  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: GREAT ILL SHOW YPU WHEN WE CALL THEN  
asassy: s i g h  
yourultimatesenpai: funny thing is this is the exact same thing that happened the last time we video called  
yuuri_79: do you guys video call often  
hinatit: have you seen us video call at all the entire time u have been here  
yuuri_79: no  
hinatit: u have answered your own question  
yuuri_79: shut  
hinatit: it was all a clever ruse  
asassy: why you gotta be so ruse  
hinatit: thats not ev e n  
hinatit: whatever

ROLLINGTHUNDER: it has come to my attention that suga, yamguchi, tanaka and i are the only karasuno players who havent changed our names in this chat yet  
yourultimatesenpai: and ennoshita  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you would know huh  
yourultimatesenpai: shut your dirty mout  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: rude  
asassy: why you gotta be so rude  
sugamomma: well theres really no reason to is there?  
hinatit: untrue  
hinatit: its to be memey  
sugamomma: am i not memey enough as it is, with this name?  
hinatit: well sure  
hinatit: but if it were smth like. sugadaddy. ba-bam  
kingofthecornmaze: ba-bam?  
hinatit: shut up  
sugamomma: but the joke is that sugamomma sounds like my name  
sugamomma: sugawara  
sugamomma: sugadaddy doesnt sound anything like that  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): yes but its funnier  
sugamomma: sugamomma isnt funny?  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): OH YEAH OF COURSE IT IS ;;;;;;;  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): (hinata help pls)  
sugamomma: how many times have we been over the fact that i can still read what youre typing even if its in parethesis  
hinatit: 346, at least  
sugamomma: still, i like my name. so why change it?  
hinatit: everyone else is  
sugamomma: so in going to let myself be peer pressured into changing my name?  
sugamomma: just because everyone else does something does not mean you have to, too.  
hinatit: why dis you go mom mode on me and teach me a lesson? i just want memes suga  
sugamomma: memes are now illegal in this chat  
hinatit: SUGA  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: HOW COULD YOU DO THIS  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (0): NO  
yourultimatesenpai: MOM  
v-nikiforov.: W H Y  
yuuri_79: viktor youre not part of theor meme team  
v-nikiforov.: mean ):  
yuur_79: life is mean  
Jesse Tennessee: Life is mean  
Jesse Tennessee: DAMNIT YOU STOLE MY THUNDER  
yuuri_79: your rolling thunder?  
Jesse Tennessee: never speak to me again  
yuuri_79: (:

yourultimatesenpai: solla stirða heiti ég  
hinatit: ?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: klaufsk og klunnaleg  
yourultimatesenpai: solla stirða hér kem ég  
hinatit: ??????  
whatyourultimatesenpai: haltrandi'eins og spýtukall minn veg  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ig langar svo að verða liðug  
hinatit: what language is this  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: leika mér að fara í splitt  
hinatit: splitt  
yourultimatesenpai: ég get ekki hlaupið um  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: með hinum krökkunum  
yourultimatesenpai: né gengið uppi'á grindverkum  
phichit+chu: @yall so confused while im just translating lol  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): rt  
yourultimatesenpai: því ég er læst í liðamótunum  
yourultimatesenpai: sjá bara hvað ég er stirð!  
hinatit: idk what that says but no  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ahh!  
yourultimatesenpai: ayiee!  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ahhh!  
yourultimatesenpai: en mig langar svo mikið að verða liðug

Jesse Tennessee had renamed the conversation to "uncalled for use of foreign languages".  
yourultimatesenpai: leika mér að fara'i splitt  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: en ég get það bara ekki!  
sugamomma: is this some kind of meme  
yourultimatesenpai: solla stirða heiti égsugamomma: because i banned memes  
yourultimatesenpai: klaufsk og klunnaleg  
hinatit: why are you like this  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ennþá get ég ekki þó á mig sjálfa reimað skó  
yourultimatesenpai: mig langar svo að verða liðug  
hinatit: are we gonna have a problemROLLINGTHUNDER: leika mér að fara'i splitt  
hinatit: you got a bone to pick  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: en get ég ekki þó reimað skóa  
hinatit: weve come so far why now are you pullign on my DICK  
hinatit: nornally id slap your face off  
hinatit: and everyone here could watch!  
hinatit: but im feeling nice  
hinatit: heres some advice  
hinatit: listen up beeyotch!  
kingofthecornmaze: whyd u spell bich like that  
hinatit: oh, fuck off

ennoSHITa: tanaka

ennoSHITa: TANAKA  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: sorry buddy he got off again  
ennoSHITa: guess ill die

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> man sorry for the shit chapter :/  
> yall remember when this used to be a fic that was for fun? why am i all serious abt it now lol i shouldnt have to aologize for a shit chapter  
> but im still sorry so  
> heres a pic of bokuto eating watermelon that i saw when i went on my "picture of bo eating things" hunt
> 
> a good bo  
>  
> 
> as always u kno what to do!! put ur fave line in the(s) comments!! mines at the top!


	41. Chapter 41

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> is haikyuu a dead fandom yet  
> is this fic irrelevant  
> ty to the people who still actually read this!!
> 
> this is meant to be the Real Chapter 40 since therewas that whole "its been fun" thing.  
> i was just yanking your collective leg, yall!
> 
> Shit actually gets real in this chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heavily inspired by mathsgeek314!! i recently started reading their be more chill chatfic "who actually texts people this much" n its really nice. go show them some love!!  
> http://archiveofourown.org/works/10847007/chapters/24082557
> 
>  
> 
> favorite line(s): every time noya says "fucking" during the fight part

Jesse Tennessee: Ok new rule no more me  
sugamomma: ok bye daichi  
hinatit: YOU COME INTO MY ME  
kingofthecornmaze: dont say that ever again  
hinatit: YOU IMPOSE ON MY HOUSE  
hinatit: YOU IMPOSE ON MY HOUSE  
hinatit: GET OUT OF MY ME  
kingofthecornmaze: what did i just tell you  
Jesse Tennessee: I meant to type "no more memes" but i accidentally pressed enter  
hinatit: (ENTER MEME) he says in parentheses  
hinatit: dont be shocked when your tumblr dash mentions me  
hinatit: essentially  
hinatit: they reblog me relentlessly  
kingofthecornmaze: eno ug h  
hinatit: its never enough  
kingofthecornmaze: SHHUT  
hinatit: fuxk you

hinatit renamed the conversation to "fuck you".

 

hinatit: establishing shot?  
hinatit: more like  
hinatit: establishing thot  
kingofthecornmaze: straight kingofthecornmaze: more like  
kingofthecornmaze: gay  
hinatit: thats n ot how it works kageyama  
TsukihimaO'Kei: establishing shot more like establishing short  
hinatit: shut your fuck up  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: establishing shot more like establishing shit  
asassy: this fine establishment  
hinatit: stop fuck you  
asassy: rude  
asassy: whY yU GOTTA  
hinatit: STOP FUXK YOU

Jesse Tennessee: I miss the old asahi  
Jesse Tennessee: He used to be our son but now noya took him away from us  
Jesse Tennessee: And no he eternally sings that god forsaken song  
hinatit: (i hope i pray but gods not there so steve im ending our affair)  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: no i didnt ):  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i just made him my boyfriend dont bully me ):  
Jesse Tennessee: You ruined a perfectly good ace is what you did  
Jesse Tennessee: Look at him, hes got anxiety  
asassy: i already had anxiety but thanks  
sugamomma: technically it wasnt even nota. it was the expose noya group, right?  
hinatit: *#EXPOSENOYA  
ROLLUNTHUNDER: ty mom (,;  
sugamomma: np sweetie

v-nikiforov.: im here now what  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: do whatever your heart desires  
v-nikiforov.: true loves kiss  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: what  
v-nikiforov.: what

plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: its been half an hour but ehaT THE FUCK VIKTOR YOUVE KISSED YUURI BEFORE ARE YOU TRYINGN TO SAY SOMETHING????

plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: ??????????1

plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: wtf viktor answer me  
hinatit: ruh roh, where is he??  
yuuri_79: if im guessing i think tanaka and noya had something to do with it //stares pointedly  
yourultimatesenpai: what us  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we are perfect angels who did not do anything  
yourultimatesenpai: spare us please  
yuuri_79: you fucks are suspicious dont think i dont know whats up  
yuuri_79: you stole viktor  
yuuri_79: or  
yuuri_79: yall n vitya r plannin smth................................................  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we would never do such a thing we are perfect angels  
yourultimatesenpai: yes whoever stole viktor should have to clean the gym for a month  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: maybe not that far  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: maybe just like a week or something  
TsukishimaO'Kei: why is everything about cleaning the gym with you two  
yourultimatesenpai: its the ultimate punishment  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: bro its the ultimate senpai  
yourultimatesenpai: BRO  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: BRO  
hinatit: seriously are you guys like planning smth  
yourultimatesenpai: ~ w a i t n s e e ~  
hinatit: well turn it around wait n see  
hinatit: 'cause all that it takes is a little re  
hinatit: in  
hinatit: ven  
hinatit: ion  
kingofthecornmaze: stop  
hinatit: its easy to change if you give it  
hinatit: your  
hinatit: at  
hinatit: ten  
hinatit: tion  
kingofthecornmaze: STOP  
hinatit: all you gotta do is just believe you can be who you wanna be  
hinatit: sincerely  
kingofthecornmaze: w h y  
hinatit: me

bleach: fuck you 5suga  
sugamomma: why does everyone feel the need to constantly bully me  
hinatit: YOU what the fuck do u mean IM THE ONE ALWAYD BEING BULLIED FUCK YOU MOM  
sugamomma: hello yes Daichi we have a rebellious child  
Jesse Tennessee: Hello yes im on my way  
Jesse Tennessee: Youre under arrest hinata  
bleach: well i said fuck u bc im vegetarian  
hinatit: ?????  
bleach: vegetarians cant have sugar???  
TsukishimaO'Kei: are you a fucking idiot  
bleach: I MAY BE STUPID BUT IM NOT DUMB DONT CALL ME AN IDIOT  
TsukishimaO'Kei: exhibit A. an idiot.  
bleach: fuck you and suga!!!!!!!!!!!  
hinatit: what the fuck even  
sugamomma: i will not have this type of language in my house boys  
hinatit: im Outside (Tee Em)  
sugamomma: fuck you  
hinatit: WELL I NEVER  
hinatit: RUDE  
asassy: why you go tt a  
hinatit: dont even start with me azumane  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: is that an example of using the last name to be threatening  
hinatit: idk lol  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: thats not an answer

plisetkymorelikepissoffsky: ANSWER ME YOU FUCKBISCUIT

plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: I FUXKING HATE THIS CHAT YOU GUYS ARE TEARING THIS FAMILY APART I HATE YOU ALL FUCK YOU

ROLLINGTHUNDER: ive been #EXPOSED its donald trumps turn  
yourultimatesenpai: rollingtrump  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: stop  
hinatit: im tired of #EXPOSING people because we tried like 70 TIMES WITH YOU NOYA and u were fucking stubborn  
hinatit: fuck you  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: maybe dont be so rude about it you piece of shit  
asassy: ewhy you  
asassy: fgot  
assasy: ta  
asassy: bee,  
hinatit: asahi when they find ur body in a lake next week you can blame yourself

phichit+chu: viktor why are you so nice  
v-nikiforov.: because being mean is mean.  
hinata: astute observation  
v-nikiforov.: shut up  
v-nikiforov.: wheres this sudden compliment coming from?  
phichit+chu: i just realized how well you treat yuuri and im so grateful that my son has such a loving husband  
yuuri_79: im older than you phichit  
phichit+chu: fuck you  
v-nikiforov.: im grateful to be his husband  
yuuri_79: i dont know how to deal with this affection  
v-nikiforov.: come give me a kiss!!!!!!!  
yuuri_79: first of all, im comfy where i an, second of all, where the fuck are you  
v-nikiforov.: im withhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhrhhddjdj@Jjdjs  
yuuri_79: wtf  
yourultimtesenpai: sorry thats classified information  
hinatit: oh, fuck you buddy im coming over  
yourultimatesenpai: were not at my house  
hinatit: noyas?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: nope ;3c  
hinatit: fuck you

bleach: i came here for memes and all i get is seriosus shit ):  
imalwaysthisnice: i know right? i didnt WANT them to meme but its better than all this deep garbage, heavy relationshit. the meme times were simpler times. peaceful times.  
bleach: why did you combine relstiobship and shit  
imalwaysthisnice: let me do what i want  
imalwaysthisnice: at least 32 people came out of the closet  
imalwaysthisnice: and its like all these couples never have relationship problems!!  
imalwaysthisnice: surreal bullshit, i say.  
bleach: i miss the meme times  
hinatit: i agree actually  
imalwaysthisnice: YOU FUCKBISCUIT YOU CANT SAY THAT YOURE THE ONE WHO STARTED THIS BULLSHIT  
imalwaysthisnice: YOU AND FUCKING KAGEYAMA  
imalwaysthisnice: YOU CANT LIE I READ THE HAT CHISTORY  
bleach: the hat what  
hinatit: fine. you want memes. ill give you memes. phichit.  
phichit+chu: on it  
phichit+chu: "BLUE" FROM HEATHqERS BUT INSTEAD OF SINGING ABOUT HOW BLUE THEIR BALLS ARE THEYRE SINGING ABOUT HOW GAY THEY ARE (REST PEACEFULLY, KURT AND RAM)  
Jesse Tennessee: This makes me unnecessarily angry for some reason  
Jesse Tennessee: Phichit i want to choke you  
Jesse Tennessee: (Howd i do hinata)  
hinatit: (im proud of u dadchi)  
phichit+chu: yeah well grab a leash and get in line daichi  
Jesse Tennessee: I want to shove you down a steep flight of spiral stairs  
phichit+chu: violence me daddy  
Jesse Tennessee: And theres qwhere i draw the line  
Jesse Tennessee: Fuck all of you  
hinatit: someone reference an dead meme  
ennoSHITa: uhhh, left shark  
hinatit: im cringing but good  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: harambe  
hinatit: ok ow  
v-nikiforov.: fidget spinner  
hinatit: And theres where i draw the line  
Jesse Tennessee: Dont quote me  
ennoSHITa: dont @ me  
yourultimatesenpai: Bad day?  
grand_king: good grammar? in MY chat? its more likely than you think  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: centipedes? in MY kaneki? its more likely than you think  
hinatit: dead anime, you weeaboo  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: im fucking japanese you cant say that  
hinatit: fuck you, weeb, i do what i want  
imalwaysthisnice: i think its back to normal  
hinatit: fuckbyou  
kingofthecornmaze: hinata why ate you so angry  
kingofthecornmaze: youre like 2 cm tall how much anger can ur body really hold  
hinatit: fuxk off kageyama  
lingofthecornmaze: your own boyf riend. how dare.  
hinatit: ah, i see someone has taken my advice and listened to a certain musical (;  
kingofthecornmaze: nO  
kingofthecornmaze: UNTRUE IT WAS  
kingofthecornmaze: TYPO  
hinatit: i see right through you kageyama  
kingofthecornmaze: fuck you  
hinatit: now whos angry you tall fukboi  
kingofthecornmaze: hinata you tit when the fuck dis i become fukboi material and why  
hinatit: just now because i fucking said so fuck you  
asassy: seems like a heated debate  
hinatit: ASTUTE FUCKING OBSERVATION AZUMANE  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: again, is this using the last name to sound intimidating or  
asassy: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
asassy: ff;;;; u.cK YOUU:: hin. Ata!

asassy left the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: Hinata.  
hinatit: uhh  
yourultimatesenpai: i dont have a link, but one of those vines where its like "run. DANANANANANAA-"

(hinatit: fuck, asahi im  
hinatit: sorry  
asassy: whatever its fine i just  
asassy: i dont know  
asassy: sorry  
hinatit: no i didnt mean to like  
hinatit: say that  
hinatit: didnt mean it  
hinatit: sorry  
asassy: its ok  
hinatit: really?  
asassy: yeah)

(ROLLINTHUNDER: asahi?  
asassy: noya?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: are you ok???  
asassy: kind of?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: kind of??  
asassy: well uh  
asassy: i dont know  
asassy: i know hinata didnt mean it like that but i feel like everyones always teasing me in that chat and no one likes me and i just  
asassy: i dont know  
asassy: sorry  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: dont be sorry  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: its okay we like you asahi  
asassy: ok  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: we like you  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i love you  
asassy: i love you too)

TsukishimaO'Kei: whys it quiet  
gucci: shut up  
TsukishimaO'Kei: wtf????????

(ROLLINGTHUNDER: im gonna fucking murder you  
hinatit: WHAT THE FUCK I TOLD HIM SORRY AND HE SAID ITS OK  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: well its fucking not  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you fucking hurt my bf prepare to pay  
hinatit: you know what noya, i tried to apologize and he said it was ok  
hinatit: i dont know what the fuck else you want from me  
hinatit: fuck you  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: fuck you)

(hinatit: asahi i meant it. you didnt do anything wrong.  
asassy: i know  
hinatit: im really sorry  
asassy: its ok  
hinatit: really?  
asassy: really)

(hinatit: fuck you  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: fuck you  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: stop acting like youre the victim here shouyou  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you really fucking hurt asahi  
hinatit: i was joking  
hinatit: i said fucking sorry and he accepted my apology  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: joking?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: that explains it  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: it was just your shit humor  
hinatit: shit? You have the same sense of humor asshole  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: what? no. at least my jokes dont hurt your boyfriends feelings.  
hinatit: dont bring kageyama into this  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: fuck you)

TsukishimaO'Kei: why is it so quiet seriously  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: kageyama  
kingofthecornmaze: ??  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: oikawas right  
kingofthecornmaze: abt what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: about being a fucking useless piece of shit  
TsukishimaO'Kei: tsukishima o'shit  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: no one actually likes you  
yourultimatesenpai: noya?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and when you think about it it makes sense because youre such a stuck up king. step off your damn high horse for once and fuck off  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: youre gonna be a lonely king forever. its because of your shit personality.  
kingofthecornmaze: stop calling me that  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: was that a demand from the king? well, newsflash asshole  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: youre not actually a king  
Jesse Tennessee: Nishinoya stop  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and no ones gonna fucking listen to you if no one likes you  
sugamomma: noya  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: and no one does  
sugamomma: NISHINOYA

kingofthecornmaze left the conversation.

ROLLINGTHUNDER: bye, dick  
hinatit: YUU FUCKING STOP  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: fuck off, shouyou  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: no one likes you either  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: youre so fucking annoying  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: everyone hates you  
hinatit: stop  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: why? if you hurt my boyfriend youre gonna get fucked up  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i hate you hinata shouyou

Jesse Tennessee removed ROLLINGTHUNDER from the conversation.

Jesse Tennessee: Suga  
sugamomma: im on it  
v-nikiforov.: what the fuck is going on  
yuuri_79: youre not with noya?  
yourultimatesenpai: hes with me

(sugamomma: noya  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wtf do u want  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: you here to bitch at me too?  
sugamomma: noshinoya yuu. youre our libero. irreplaceable.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ok?  
sugamomma: im the vice captain. sugawara koushi.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: ok, thats true? so what?  
sugamomma: im practically your mother. i have the right to kick you out of the house (volleyball team). youre being abusive to you brothers (teammates) and why should i allow that?  
sugamomma: you need to own up to your decisions and face the consequences.  
sugamomma: If you don't apologize by tomorrow, I won't hesitate to disown you. Remember your place. Own up.)

v-nikiforov.: are you okay hinata?  
hinatit: I'm fine guys!! Can't let him get to me haha  
hinatit: So basically I'm all good lol dont worrya  
Jesse Tennessee: Good  
Jesse Tennessee: Hows kageyama?  
hinatit: about to check

(hinatit: Babe? You okay?  
kingofthecornmaze: im goo  
kingofthecornmaze: *good  
hinatit: seriously?  
kingofthecornmaze: im fine  
hinatit: no youre not  
kingofthecornmaze: did noya mean all that shit?  
hinatit: NO  
kingofthecornmaze: why are you dating me  
hinatit: i love yoy  
kingofthecornmaze: you hesitated saying that  
hinatit: no i didnt i love you seriously  
kingofthecornmaze: im a selfish stuck-up king  
hinatit: youre not  
hinatit: youre my loving caring boyfriend)

(ROLLINGTHUNDER: FUXK  
asassy: what  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: I KEEP FUCKING INSULTING MY FRIENDS AND I KNOW ITS HURTING THEM BUT I CANT STP I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO DAICHI KICKED ME OUT OF CHAT  
asassy: why were you insulting them in the first place?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: FOr you  
asassy: noya im not a dame in need of protecting  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: but hinata  
asassy: it wasn't okay of you to do  
ROLLINTHUNDER: im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry im sorry  
asassy: shhh  
asassy: let them blow off steam for a while before trying to make up  
asassy: believe me, i know how to deal with people like this)

(hinatit: kageyama please  
hinatit: do you want me to come over?  
kingofthecornmaze: please)

hinatit: hes alright i think.  
hinatit: headed over to his house now to check up on him  
Jesse Tennessee: Good  
Jesse Tennessee: Suga?  
sugamomma: i talked to him.  
Jesse Tennessee: Could you talk to asahi too and see if hes alright?  
sugamomma: got it

(sugamomma: asahi honey how are you doing? do you need me to come over?  
asassy: im fine  
sugamomma: you dont seem fine  
sugamomma: do you want added back to chat?  
asassy: not yet. ill tell you when im ready.  
sugamomma: im always here if you need to talk.  
asassy: i know)

TsukishimaO'Kei: what??? happened???  
gucci: seriously  
TsukishimaO'Kei: yamaguchi you were the one who told m to shut up  
gucci: that was before noy fucking destroyed kageyama  
Jesse Tennessee: Noya yelled at hinata for his comment to asahi  
Jesse Tennessee: It all just escalated from there  
gucci: Oh  
TsukishimaO'Kei: Oh shit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gr8 chapter right  
> this is so heavily insp by "who actually texts people this much" its not even funny.
> 
> tell me what youd like to see next chap!!  
> and of course dont forget to put your favorite line(s) in the comments. mines at the top as always!!!!!
> 
> if u see any major mistake pls tell me, i posted this in a hurry while in a study hall lol whoops  
> i have finals to study for and this is the shit i pull
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> this fic is alive i swear


	42. Chapter 42

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thgere was gonna be more to this chapter but i got lazy
> 
> welcome back to Noya Fucked Up, the fic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whens the last time i updated this fic
> 
>  
> 
> fave lines:
> 
> sugamomma: WHATEVER THIS IS, DONT DO THI T O ME  
> v-nikiforov.: thit?  
> v-nikiforov.: thit……………  
> v-nikiforov.: TIT  
> sugamomma: NO

Hinata stumbled off his bike, dumping it on the ground and hurrying up to Kageyama’s door. He cast a quick glance into the window. Didn’t look like his mom was home. Kageyama probably wasn’t in any state to get the door himself.

Ah, fuck it.

Hinata opened the door and let himself in, abandoning his bike in Kageyama’s yard and heading inside. He shut the door behind him, walking as quick as he could without making too much of a commotion.

“Kageyama?” He called, keeping his voice down.

“In my room,” was the answer he received.

The ginger nodded to himself and headed to his boyfriend’s room. He pushed the door open and gently edged inside. Kageyama was sitting on his bed, staring at the ceiling and messing idly with his boot. That’s right, his ankle. It was dim, the lights off and the room lit with just natural light from the windows. He wasn’t crying or anything, but Hinata could see the hurt in his slate blue eyes, even with the dull lighting in the room.

Hinata sat down next to him, leaning his head against Kageyama’s shoulder. Kageyama shifted to accommodate him, shuffling toward the wall slightly and moving his arm to rest over the smaller of the two’s shoulders.

“How are you feeling, now?” Hinata asked, voice almost low enough to be a whisper.

Kageyama bit his lip. “... Better. I’m just overreacting.”

“No, hey, baby, look at me.” Hesitantly, the setter nodded and turned his gaze to Hinata’s eyes. Hinata gave him his Serious Look before continuing. “You’re not overreacting. Nishinoya’s the one overreacting. You have every right to be upset.”

Letting out a soft sigh, Kageyama shook his head. “Noya’s not overreacting. He’s pissed ‘cause you made Asahi feel bad.”

“I didn’t mean to. I apologized and he accepted it and everything.” Hinata muttered, feeling emotion bubble up in his chest.

“Sometimes people need time.” Kageyama murmured.

Hinata shrugged in some sort of agreement. “Noya isn’t giving it time. He insulted you for no reason. I told him not to bring you int-”

“Maybe don’t follow Nishinoya’s example, then?”

When a hand covered his mouth, he peered up at Kageyama. His eyebrows were drawn together and he was frowning. Hinata didn’t say anything, mostly because there was a hand over his mouth. Kageyama continued. “Shouyou… can we just… sit here? Together? I don’t really wanna talk about it.”

He watched his boyfriend a moment more before nodding and taking Kageyama’s larger hand off his mouth in both of his own. He pressed a soft kiss to his knuckles and leaned into his chest. Kageyama hummed contentedly and rested his cheek on top of Hinata’s head.

Hinata took one of his hands back after a moment, fitting the other into Kageyama’s hand now. “I’m gonna tell the others you’re good, yeah? So they don’t worry.”

He gave a noncommittal grunt in acknowledgement and Hinata rolled his eyes, pulling his phone out of his jacket pocket.

 

Jesse Tennessee: This is ridiculous  
Jesse Tennessee: One of them should have to clean the gym for like a month  
Jesse Tennessee: Or both of them  
sugamomma: is that necessary?  
Jesse Tennessee: All im saying is that the fight was pointless  
Jesse Tennessee: For either of them  
sugamomma: i agree, but… they dont need punishment right now  
sugamomma: they need our love and support!!! as their parents!!!  
hinatit: hey guys!  
hinatit: kags is all good now  
hinatit: well maybe not all good but yknow  
sugamomma: yeah  
hinatit: hows asahi?  
sugamomma: last time we talked was like 15 minutes ago  
sugamomma: so idk  
sugamomma: maybe ask noya  
hinatit: cant  
hinatit: noyas pissed  
hinatit: and ill get pissed and if i get pissed it probably wont be good for kageyama

 

“I’ll be fine.” Kageyama said, nudging him with a yawn.

“Stop reading. Get your own phone out if you wanna read. You snooper.” Hinata huffed, but tilted his head slightly to press a kiss to Kageyama’s neck. His boyfriend shivered and nudged him again, harder this time. Yet he made no move to get his own phone.

 

Jesse Tennessee: Thats true  
Jesse Tennessee: Still, you should apologize to him, and maybe asahi again  
hinatit: i will  
hinatit: eventually  
hinatit: not right now though  
Jessee Tennessee: Yeah

(sugamomma: Noya, I think you owe someone an apology.  
sugamomma: Two someones, in fact, if I’m recalling correctly.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i know  
sugamomma: I’m removing your deadline.  
sugamomma: It’s not right to give you a deadline.  
sugamomma: But there are still consequences for your actions, Nishinoya.  
sugamomma: Please, remember to do the right thing.  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i know  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: im sorry  
sugamomma: It’s not me you should be apologizing to.)

sugamomma: brb im kinda pissed ):  
Jesse Tennessee: Do you need me?  
sugamomma: im good, stay here with everyone please  
Jesse Tennessee: Okay  
v-nikiforov.: hi sorry i still dont actually understand what happened???? so if??? someone could explain? thatd be great??????????  
yuuri_79: youre not the only one  
TsukishimaO’Kei: yeah im confused for once  
gucci: maybe you wouldnt be if you had payed attention  
TsukishimaO’Kei: OKAY YAMAGUCHI QUIT BEING AN ASSHOLE ) : <  
gucci: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
Jesse Tennessee: I told u  
Jesse Tennessee: I was literally just telling you before hinata came back  
v-nikiforov.: no? literally all you said was “All im saying is that it was unnecessary”  
Jesse Tennessee: Yes and before that i explained  
v-nikiforov.: not really  
Jesse Tennessee: Whatever  
Jesse Tennessee: If i explained properly youd just spread gossip  
v-nikiforov.: O-M-G YURA ANSWER ME WOAH WAIT UNTIL I TELL YOU WHAT I HEARD  
v-nikiforov.: ITS TOO F U C K E D TO TYPE  
v-nikiforov.: THIS S H I T IS R I P E  
v-nikiforov.: call back! ill yell u every w o r d  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: nikiforov calling?  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: nikiforov calling,,,,,  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: nikiforov calling, hey!  
v-nikiforov.: OHMYGOD OHMYGOD OK SO  
v-nikiforov.: at the end of last nights catfight!  
v-nikiforov.: very end of last nights catfight!  
hinatit: catfight?  
Jesse Tennessee: Stop this is serious  
Jesse Tennessee: You cant meme your way out of everything  
v-nikiforov.: yes we can  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: Смотри на меня  
v-nikiforov.: did you see noya?  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: oh i saw noya  
v-nikiforov.: so hes behaving crazy like a tweakin junkie!  
v-nikiforov.: flailin crazy like a freakin monkey  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: hes gotta learn to handle his high shouldnt drink so much for a small guy  
v-nikiforov.: right but  
v-nikiforov.: he wasnt drunk  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: the hell you sayin viktor??  
v-nikiforov.: YO HE WASNT DRUNK  
plisetskymorelikemissoffsky: t h e h e l l y o u s a y i n v i k t o r  
TsukishimaO’Kei: halt, this is the meme police  
TsukishimaO’Kei: dont think you can just use a different language to evade the law  
phichit+chu: คุณจะไม่จับฉันชีวิตตำรวจ  
TsukishimaO’Kei: FUCK OFF  
v-nikiforov: no! bc i heard from hinata that noya barely touched a drop  
v-nikiforov: which means that you cant blame the things he said on alcohol!  
hinatit: its just so terrible i dont want to relive it all…  
hinatit: but do u want me to tell u >:3c  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: spit it out spit it out  
hinatit: you really want me to tell u? ;3c  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: s p i t i t o u t s p i t i t o u t  
hinatit: ill tell you cause you are my closest friend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: no im not?  
hinatit: yeah ik (,,,,,,,,,;  
hinatit: BUT HERES WHAT HAPPENED AT THE CAAAATFIIIIIGHTS EEEEEND  
Jesse Tennessee: Okay but really stop this is serious  
hinatit: its not over yet anyway lm a o im still pissed at noya

 

Hinata drew his attention away from the chat and back to Kageyama, who was now dozing off, leaning heavily against him. Hinata laughed slightly and brought the other’s hand up to his lips again, careful not to wake him.

He glanced down at his phone when it buzzed with a new message, and was surprised to find that it wasn’t the group chat.

 

(ROLLINGTHUNDER: im sorry  
hinatit: are you?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yeah i dont know wgat got into me and i just kept seinding things and i couldnt stop i was so pissed  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: im so soryr hinata  
hinatit: i dont believe you)

 

After a moment, Hinata rolled his eyes. Noya wasn’t responding. Maybe his apology really wasn’t sincere.

That’s what he thought, up until his phone started blasting All Star by Smash Mouth. He regretted everything. Quickly, he answered his phone without checking who was calling.

“What the fuck?!” He stage whispered, trying not to wake Kageyama up.

“... Hinata?”

His eyes narrowed.

“Why the fuck are you calling me, Nishinoya?” He asked, voice still quiet. “Make this quick. Kageyama’s asleep.”

“I’m sorry.” Noya mumbled, his voice wavering.

Hinata rolled his eyes, now, grumbling. “Oh, please.”

“I am. For waking up Kageyama-”

“He’s not awake. Yet.” He cut in.

“-and for being an asshole.”

“God knows you were. Are.”

“I’m really fucking sorry, Hinata, what else do you want from me? I’ll apologize to Kageyama. I’m apologizing to you right now. Please, I just… I don’t know what to do.” His voice was so fucking shaky, and by his own nature, Hinata really wanted to feel bad for him. He forced the feeling away, instead.

“You’d better apologize to him,” He spat. “I fucked up, but he didn’t do anything wrong. You brought up the past and you opened old wounds for no reason.”

“What, the past? Do you mean his tragic anime character past? It’s not that big a dea-”

Hinata hung up, silently fuming and grinding his teeth. How insensitive can one person be? He shut his phone off and shoved it back into his pocket.

“... Hinata?” Kageyama asked, sleepily. “Who was that?”

He froze. Fuck. “How much did you hear?”

“Nothing. Just woke up. Who was that?” He mumbled, reaching one hand up to play with a strand of Hinata’s curly hair. Hinata melted at the touch, leaning into his hand.

“No one.”

“Who was it?” The raven smiled deviously, running his fingers through his hair. He shuddered and leaned into Kageyama.

“Fine, fine, it was Nishinoya.”

Kageyama’s hand froze. Hinata huffed and cuddled into him, slipping an arm around his waist. “You asked. Three times, actually. Keep going.”

Kageyama laughed a bit at this, tugging slightly on his hair.

“Ow, not like that, you bully!”

He didn’t respond to this, taking his own phone from the nightstand and going to open the group chat… that he left. Kageyama cast a helpless glance to his partner.

“Want me to add you back?”

“Yeah.”

 

Jesse Tennessee: Suga plea se come save me from the memes ple a s e  
sugamomma: okay okay im here whats up  
Jesse Tennessee: Theyre memeing  
sugamomma: ok?  
sugamomma: whats new?  
Jesse Tennessee: DKFJGRAJALGAVKGLLMKMKLDMLK  
Jesse Tennessee: YOUE NOT GONNA HELP ME?!?!??!?!!/!1?/!/!/!/!/!?1//!!

hinatit added kingofthecornmaze to the conversation.

hinatit: no one escapes fuck you  
kingofthecornmaze: why is that the name of the gc  
hinatit: fuck you  
kingofthecornmaze: its all so clear now  
sugamomma: KAGEYAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!  
v-nikiforov.: black haired boy who cant skate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
kingofthecornmaze: shut up viktor  
v-nikiforov.: (;  
gucci: youre back?  
kingofthecornmaze: yea whats up nerds

 

“You’re the nerd.”

“Shut up, nerd.”

 

sugamomma: are you gay?  
sugamomma: NONOONONONO IM SORRY I MEANT *OKAY SORRY FUCk  
kingofthecornmaze: well i think we know the answer to the first one

 

Hinata nudged him.

 

sugamomma: omgggggggg nooooooooooo i meant okay  
kingofthecornmaze: yeah, i guess so  
kingofthecornmaze: im better  
sugamomma: good  
kingofthecornmaze: now that hinatas here (;  
hinatit: SHDFHSDHFHHDFSHFHDHS  
sugamomma: has noya, like,,,,, apologized or anything  
hinatit: to me  
sugamomma: okay  
sugamomma: kageyama, do you want me to tell him youre back?  
kingofthecornmaze: i dont really want to talk to him yet  
sugamomma: thats okay

 

“Noya apologized to you?” He asked as he tapped out a response.

“... Yeah.” Hinata mumbled, shrugging against him. “I was pissed. He said it wasn’t ‘that big a deal’. I hung up on him.”

“Hinata…” Kageyama started, but Hinata wasn’t having it.

“I know, it’s a dick move. But what he did was a dick move, too.” He protested, poking at the other. Kageyama rolled his eyes.

 

kingofthecornmaze: ok thanks  
kingofthecornmaze: anyways  
v-nikiforov.: PEPPA PIG  
v-nikiforov.: PEPPA PIG  
v-nikiforov.: PEPPA PIG  
v-nikiforov.: PEPPA PIG  
v-nikiforov.: PEPPA PIG  
sugamomma: STOP WHAT ARE YOU DOING  
yourultimatesenpai: PEPPA PIG  
yourultimatesenpai: PEPPA PIG  
yourultimatesenpai: PEPPA PIG  
yourultimatesenpai: PEPPA PIG  
v-nikiforov.: PEPPA PIG  
v-nikiforov.: PEPPA PIG  
v-nikiforov.: PEPPA PIG  
sugamomma: WHATEVER THIS IS, DONT DO THI T O ME  
v-nikiforov.: thit?  
v-nikiforov.: thit……………  
v-nikiforov.: TIT  
sugamomma: NO  
phichit+chu: TIT  
hinatit: KDJKD TIT  
sugamomma: N O  
grand_king: TIT  
sugamomma: WHY,,, EVERYTHING WAS GOING SO WELL,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,  
kingofthecormaze: TIT  
sugamomma: ET TU, KAGS?  
hinatit: HEH YEAHHH  
TsukishimaO’Kei: you know what, fuck it  
TuskishimaO’Kei: TIT  
gucci: H E D I D I T T H E A B S O L U T E M A D M A N  
imalwaysthisnice: THIS IS WHAT I MEANT  
imalwaysthisnice: NO MATTER HOW SERIOUS THIS CHAT GETS IT ALWAYS GOES BACK TO MEMEY  
imalwaysthisnice: IM SO FUCKING ANGRY  
puddinghead: calm down, kuroo  
puddinghead: some people?? use memes?? to cope??  
hinatit: breaking news: kenma is actually all of tumblr  
puddinghead: wahey

(ROLLINGTHUNDER: how can i apologize?  
hinatit: you cant.  
hinatit: or, at least, skypes probably not the best place to.  
hinatit: there are three steps to a genuine apology  
hinatit: step 1: i’m sorry.  
hinatit: step 2: it’s my fault.  
hinatit: step 3: what can i do to make it right?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: im scared  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: is kageyama mad?)

 

Hinata paused.

“Hey, Kags?” He hummed, chewing softly on his lip.

“Hmm?” He answered, seeming busy with the group chat.

“Are you mad at Nishinoya?”

Kageyama lowered his phone, tipping his head back to look at the ceiling in thought. “I don’t know… what he said in the group chat…” He trailed off for a moment. “It hurt. Still hurts. I don’t forgive him just yet, but… I don’t think I’m mad at him. Anymore.”

Hinata hummed, looking at his boyfriend for a moment more before looking back to his phone. “Alright.”

 

(hinatit: “i dont know if i forgive him yet but i dont think im mad at him. anymore.” direct quote  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: thank fuck  
hinatit: im still mad though  
hinatit: i told you not to involve him  
hinatit: i told you you didnt have to do this  
hinatit: and you didnt  
hinatit: yet you did it anyway  
hinatit: why?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i dont fucking know i just kept goinf  
hinatit: save it.  
hinatit: you can talk to me tomorrow at practice  
hinatit: and you can prove youre actually sorry  
hinatit: okay?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yeah  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: okay  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: sorry  
hinatit: tomorrow.)

 

“You coming back to school tomorrow? You haven’t been for like a week.” Hinata murmured, navigating out of his and Noya’s personal chat and returning to the gc. He pointed at Kageyama’s ankle, bulky boot on his foot. Why was he wearing it in bed?

“Probably. I’m really tired of sitting around in bed, but my mom’s worried.” His boyfriend answered, still gently playing with Hinata’s hair. “I’m ready to come back to practice, even if I can’t play.”

Hinata snorted, leaning into him. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“You sure you won’t get jealous of seeing this bod playin’ volleyball?” He ran a hand over his body, sending Kageyama a smug look.

Kageyama shoved him, looking away with a soft flush. “Oh, shut up.”

Hinata giggled and shoved him back. “Are you gonna need help with your stuff? ‘Cause I can help.”

“Won’t you miss your classes?” He responded, tilting his head to give him a look.

The ginger shrugged, grinning. “Anything that’ll get me out of my classes.”

Rolling his eyes, Kageyama shrugged back. “Uh, yeah, I’m probably gonna need you to carry my stuff. That or you have to help me go up stairs and shit.”

“Gladly.”

 

bleach: so anyways im shooting up the school  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): oh cool can i help  
bleach: yeah sure what can you do?  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): hack  
hinatit: seven where did you go even  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): im not a highschooler hinata, i dont have all day to spend playing volleyball and doing my homework or whatever  
bleach: but you have all day to sit around hacking shit and doing ur work?  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): hacking??? is??? my work???  
bleach: NO DONT DO THAT  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): ??????????????????????????????????????????  
bleach: im vegan?  
TsukishimaO’Kei: ok first of all you said you were vegetarian?  
thing 1: o-kei first of all  
TsukishimaO’Kei: stop  
TsukishimaO’Kei: second of all, that doesnt even make sense????  
bleach: you wouldnt get it, youre not vegan  
TsukishimaO’Kei: well, fuck, hes right. im not vegan. i wouldnt understand it. thats it, shows over, everyone go home, im not vegan and therefore do not understand.  
bleach: yes  
TsukishimaO’Kei: oh, shut the fuck up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey whats up fuckbiscuits  
> been a while aint it
> 
> im just joshin you, welcome back to everyones fave fic, Noya Fucked Up!  
> jkjkjkjkjkjkjkkjjkjkjkkjjk im joshin u again
> 
> this was a shit chapter but i hope u appreciate the formatting, bc its probably not gonna be here next chap (depending on how next chap goes)
> 
>  
> 
> alright now take bets in the comments: how many chapters do u think this fic will last for?  
> also, dont forget to put ur favorite line(s) in the comments! mine are at the top as always ((:


	43. oh shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sweats

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh  
> HEY THERE FRIENDS AHAHAHA,
> 
> i can explain,
> 
>  
> 
> i. Am Lazy. i. Am Depressed. i. Have No Motivation,  
> yeah.  
> its been a literal 7 months OOPS FUCK
> 
> there are. Dead memes in this chapter. u can really tell how old it is. I havent touched it in like 4 months oops

hinatit: alright hell team, i need help w/ smth  
Jesse Tennessee: Hell team?  
hinatit: daichi lets face it, this team is so fucked up now  
hinatit: i think we deserve to be called a hell team  
hinatit: alright you fucks which outfit  
hinatit: this.jpg  
hinatit: or_this.jpg  
sugamomma: aw the first one is cute hinataaaaaa  
Jesse Tennessee: Suga that was really gay  
sugamomma: *looks into the camera like in the office*  
Jesse Tennessee: Ok wow you dont need to be rude  
TsukishimaO’Kei: .  
TsukishimaO’Kei: .  
TsukishimaO’Kei: .  
TsukishimaO’Kei: .  
TsukishimaO’Kei: .  
TsukishimaO’Kei: bet youre really missing why you gotta be so rude now huh  
sugamomma: wtf tsukishima  
hinatit: too soon,,  
gucchi: tsUKKI WTF  
yourultimatesenpai: I LEGIT CHOKED ON MY DRINK I KID YOU NOT  
TsukishimaO’Kei: DFJSDKDLKJFKJGKFDJKG SORRY SORRYRSRS RYSOO I HA D TO IT WAS THE PERSFECT OPPURUTUNITYY  
TsukishimaO’Kei: DHKKJFDSJDFNSDJNFDJK DONT KI C K ME PL S  
Jesse Tennessee: Im calling the goddamn police  
hinatit: holy fuck  
hinatit: anyway assholes help me pick an outiftttttt  
TsukishimaO’Kei: i like the second one  
hinatit: well im not taking fashion advice from you  
TsukishimaO’Kei: rude  
hinatit: i  
hinatit: can we blacklist the word “rude” until all this shit is dealt with  
hinatit: or maybe just forever  
Jesse Tennessee: Hinata youre like the main admin in this chat  
Jesse Tennessee: You made this chat  
Jesse Tennessee: Do it yourself  
hinatit: okay okay jesus  
hinatit: The Deed Is Done  
hinatit: try it out boys  
sugamomma: r**e  
sugamomma: holy fudge  
hinatit: oh so now were bringing out the food censors huh  
sugamomma: fudge you  
hinatit: anyway now that r**e is blacklisted yall best help me pick out my fuckin outfit  
Jesse Tennessee: Can we blacklist “violent me daddy” and “tit”  
v-nikiforov.: tit  
phichit+chu: rt  
Jesse Tennessee: and “rt”  
hintait: no now help me pick an outfit  
yourultimatesenpai: i like the second one too actually  
hinatit: ok i trust your judgement bc we are friends  
hinatit: UNLIKE TSUKISHIMA, WHO IS JUST AN UNFASHIONABLE MEANIE  
TsukishimaO’Kei: listen shrimpy  
hinatit: oh were bringing shrimpy back  
yourultimatesenpai: the boys are bakc in towwwwwnnn  
hinatit: R E L A T A B L E  
yourultimatesenpai: the shrimpys back in town  
hinatit: instantly less relatable  
yourultimatesenpai: you know what fuck you hinata  
hinatit: ily2 boo xoxo  
kingofthecornmaze: ):  
hinatit: i love you kageyama!!!!!!!!!!  
yourultimatesenpai: gay  
kingofthecornmaze: shut up tanaka dont make me call ennoshita  
yourultimatesenpai: why would you call ennoshita  
yachi: are you seriously playing stupid tanaka  
ennoSHITa: what  
yourultimatesenpai: what  
hinatit: is now really the time for this  
hinatit: the answer is yes  
hinatit: yes it is  
yourultimatesenpai: listen mfer i dont bother u abt kageyama  
ennoSHITa: wha. T  
yourutlimatesenpai: what  
hinatit: maybe ill just add noya back, he knows exaaaactly what youre going through now  
yourultimatesenpai: HINATA  
ennoSHITa: WHAT  
yourultimatesenpai: WHAT  
hinatit: okay okay ill have mercy on you  
hinatit: now help me choose an outfit pls  
yourultimatesenpai: I ALREADY SAID I LIKE THE 2ND ONE  
hinatit: ok ok dont need to yell  
Jesse Tennessee: He wasnt yelling he was typing in all caps  
hinatit: listen mfer  
yourultimatesenpai: shut up hinata  
hinatit: r**e  
hinatit: wait  
TsukishimaO’Kei: PFFFFFFFVVVFDVFD IM CRYIN AND DYIN SCOOB  
yourultimatesenpai: b l e a s e  
hinatit: you would not believe your eyes  
hinatit: if you shut the fuck up, guys  
yourultimatesenpai: I Cannot Allow This  
hinatit: Unfortunate  
yourultimatesenpai: YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE  
yourultimatesenpai: YOU IMPOSE ON MY MEMES  
yourultimatesenpai: YOU IMPOSE ON MY Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh  
hinatit: the long Uh is adhd culture ur not allowed to use it  
yourultimatesenpai: its too late for that now  
hinatit: im calling the police  
Jesse Tennessee: Dont steal my meme  
hinatit: consider it stolen  
hinatit: moshi moshi police desu  
TsukishimaO’Kei: HINATA SHOUYOU THIS IS THE MEME POLICE WEVE GOT YOU SURROUNDED  
hinatit: WELL F U C K ME GENTLY WITH A C H A I N S A W  
yourultimatesenpai: W A H E Y GET HIM BOYS  
hinatit: ~tanaka do not interact~  
yourultimatesenpai: wtf r**e  
hinatit: can u guys just help me choose an outfit  
yourultimatesenpai: then stop teading me abt ennoshita bitch  
ennoSHITa: what  
yourultimatesenpai: what

Jesse Tennessee: Alright  
Jesse Tennessee: I see this is how it must be  
sugamomma: what

Jesse Tennessee renamed the conversation to “Karasuno Team Chat”.

hinatit: a classic  
Jesse Tennessee: Only the original squad remembers  
hinatit: Youve Ruined It  
sugamomma: so many people used to be active in this chat  
sugamomma: what happened  
hinatit: they couldnt handle the memes  
hinatit: remember shark boy? kagami?  
shark: and lava girl  
kagamimimi: im still here. just kinda lurkin now  
hinatit: wtf kagami  
kagamimimi: i just watched alllllll that drama go down and didnt say a word  
hinatit: r**e you couldve sided with me  
Jesse Tennessee: Hinata thats not how it works  
hinatit: shut the hell your mouth!  
yourultimatesenpai: everything feels different without n**a around ):  
yourultimatesenpai: HINATA WTF YOU TIT  
yourultimatesenpai: DID YOU BLACKLIST HIS NAME?????  
hinatit: ONLY UNTIL HES READY TO COME BACK AND STOP BEING A LITTLE SHIT  
hinatit: HE HE TOXIC BOY  
yourultimatesenpai: i  
TsukishimaO’Kei: hinata im calling the police  
v-nikiforov.: tit?  
v-nikiforov.: did i see tit in there somewhere?  
hinatit: yall,,,,,,,,,, i miss terushima  
bleach: drink me?  
hinatit: yeah thats the mmmmm good shit  
yachi: i miss seven  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): speak of the devil and he shall appear  
yachi: 707 i hate you  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): WHAT THE FUCK  
hinatit: yall remember that time we went to a trampoline park  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): no  
hinatit: not you  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): im gonna see if i can find any security footage  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): what park did you go to  
hinatit: im not telling you  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): what why  
hinatit: im not making this easy for you  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): r**e

hinatit: dikpic.png  
Jesse Tennessee: Hinata…  
hinatit: OH SCHWOOPSIE I MEANT TO SEND THAT TO KAGS IN PRIVAT CHAT FSHDJFKSDFS  
sugamomma: HINATA I THOUGH WE TAUGHT YOU BETTER THAN THIS  
sugamomma: I DIDNT RAISE MY SON TO SEND NUDES AND DICK PICS TO HIS BOYFRIEND  
hinatit: wait did you guys open it?  
sugamomma: OF COURSE NOT  
Jesse Tennessee: NO WE DIDNT FUCKIN OPEN IT I DONT WANNA SEE YOUR DICK  
hinatit: omgmfgmgmfmgfmfd im sobbing  
hinatit: guys open the pic its not my dick  
sugamomma: this is………  
Jesse Tennessee: What is that thing  
sugamomma: a very small deer?  
hinatit: its called a dik-dik  
hinatit: i was trying to send it to kageyama  
kingofthecornmaze: aw babe  
hinatit: only true bfs send each other cute animal pics  
kingofthecornmaze: tru  
sugamomma: ok but whyd you name the file dikpic  
hinatit: well first of all it was funny  
hinatit: second of all, its true, its a pic of a dik-dik  
TsukishimaO’Kei: so i want hinata to die but whats new  
hinatit: R**E  
hinatit: SHIT  
TsukishimaO’Kei: HA

seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): anyone else just have an insane craving for donuts rn  
hinatit: always  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): wanna come get donuts with me  
hinatit: seven are you even in the area  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): no but wanna come get donuts with me  
hinatit: i  
hinatit: yeah kinda  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): nic e  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): but for real i wish someone would bring me donuts  
yoohoosung: hi seven  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): no not you  
yoohoosung: wtf, bullshit  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): *shrug emoji*

hinatit: i hope my mom doesnt think i smoke weed  
kingofthecornmaze: i… i dont know what to say about that  
TsukishimaO’Kei: why would she think you smoke weed  
Jesse Tennessee: Do you smoke weed  
hinatit: NO  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): well judging by his internet history,,,,,  
hinatit: seven why  
seven (7) zero (0) seven (7): *thomas the train theme*  
hinatit: that is not an appropriate answer to the question i asked

hinatit: guys wanna hear smth ironic  
yachi: oh boy  
Jesse Tennessee: Please just leave me alone hinata its 2 am and i want to sleep  
sugamomma: daichi its almost 4 am what world do you live in  
Jesse Tennessee: I just woke up  
Jesse Tennessee: We have school tomorrow guys im fuxkin goon back to sleep  
sugamomma: do not say that word to me sawamura  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: suga yes hi hello i have a question  
sugamomma: yes, it was being used in an intimidating way there  
plisetskymorelikepissoffsky: ok  
hinatit: wanna hear my irony or not  
yourultimatesenpai: ill hear your irony on this fine 3:52 am hinata  
hinatit: im afraid of heights  
TsukishimaO’Kei: Holy Shit  
TsukishimaO’Kei: Holy Fuck  
TsukishimaO’Kei: I Am Awed  
TsukishimaO’Kei: I Am Utterly Floored  
TsukishimaO’Kei: I Am Completely Dumbfounded  
hinatit: yeah  
hinatit: irony  
yourultimatesenpai: knowing this makes me oddly uncomfortable?  
hinatit: yeah  
hinatit: irony  
Jesse Tennessee: Is this what you think about at 3:56 in the morning  
hinatit: yeah  
hinatit: irony  
TsukishimaO’Kei: This Is Unbelievable  
TsukishimaO’Kei: I Refuse To Believe This!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
hinatit: yeah  
hinatit: irony  
yachi: are you, in extension, afraid of being tall and/or tall people?  
hinatit: yeah  
hinatit: irony  
hinatit: wait, no,

hinatit: lmao its 4:20

hinatit: yachi if you switch the a in your name to o youre yochi  
hinatit: which is kinda like yoshi  
yachi: ITS 6:09 AM HINATA DID YOU NOT SLEEP  
hinatit: no  
yachi: GO TO SLEEP HINATA SHOUYOU YOU CAN STILL GET LIKE 30 MIN  
hinatit: no

hinatit: hehe what would happen if you looked down and saw me super tiny like just 3 inches tall on the floor at your feet in your bedroom? :P hehe just imagine. Be dark if you want it's just a fantasy :P Make it a detailed answer :P  
TsukishimaO’Kei: Look down, cry, curl up on floor, abandon sanity because 3" tall person  
hinatit: npot detailed enough, go on  
TsukishimaO’Kei: Look down upon the tiny person at my feet, drop to my knees and break down sobbing, and roll over in the opposite direction in a total breakdown, all sanity drained because there is a 3 inch-tall human being staring back up at me.  
hinatit: thank uou  
yachi: guys its 7:30 youre supposed to be at school  
hinatit: i an at school  
TsukishimaO’Kei: SHIT  
hinatit: AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA

hinatit: hey bitches its almost time for practice! (:  
hinatit: cant remember if i told anyone but thats when n**a said he was gonna apologize to us  
hinatit: think hell actually do it?  
sugamomma: honestly? no  
Jesse Tennessee: I couldnt say  
kingofthecornmaze: n**a was just angry  
kingofthecornmaze: im not ready to forgive him yet but he isnt like that  
kingofthecornmaze: hell apologize  
hinatit: debatable  
kingofthecornmaze: guess well wait until practice to see  
hinatit: arent you mad kageyama??  
kingofthecornmaze: well i was  
kingofthecornmaze: but now im just mostly sad that a friend would say things like that  
kingofthecornmaze: now i realize he didnt mean it  
sugamomma: kageyama…………..  
kingofthecornmaze: ???????  
sugamomma: since when are you that levelheaded about things?????????????????  
kingofthecornmaze: i usually am, i think  
kingofthecornmaze: at least, before i joined this team  
kingofthecornmaze: you guys changed me  
Jesse Tennessee: Is that a compliment or an insult  
kingofthecornmaze: shut up dadchi im TRY I N G t o be sincere  
sugamomma: ah, theres the real kageyama  
kingofthecornmaze: SHUT UP YOURE ALL TERRIBLE  
hinatit: awwwwwwwwwwwwww how cute hes embarrassed! i think hes blushing!!!!  
kingofthecornmaze: HINATA I KNOW FOR A F A C T YOURE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FUCKING SCHOOL  
hinatit: look out the window bitch  
kingofthecornmaze: ???  
kingofthecornmaze: WHAT THE FUCK  
Jesse Tennessee: What is it  
kingofthecornmaze: HES SKIPPING CLASS  
kingofthecornmaze: W I T H O U T M E  
hinatit: i was gonna come get you  
sugamomma: NO CHILD OF M MIIIEN SI SKIIPIING CASSES HINATA G E T BAKK HERE  
kingofthecornmaze: WHAT THE FUCK  
Jesse Tennessee: WHAT  
kingofthecornmaze: I JUSUT WATCHHED SUGA ZOOOOOOM OUT  
sugamomma: JOKES ON YOUU BITICHHES I HAVE A GGROUUND LFOOR CLASS RN IM GONNA CAT CH MY SON  
Jesse Tennessee: SUGA WHAT HT EUCIKKCKKKK KK KKKK K K K K K K K K K K KK

(ROLLINGTHUNDER: so idk whats going on but i just looked out the window and saw your wife fucking book it out of the school after an Orange Blur what hte fuck  
Jesse Tennessee: HES TRYING TO CATCH HINATA  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: wtf)

 

Hinata crossed his arms and gave Suga the nastiest glare he could manage as his mother dragged him by the elbow back into the school.

“Hinata, I swear, one of these days you’re gonna do something that’ll take my mom reputation down by, like, 10.” He muttered. Hinata attempted to twist his arm out of his mother’s grasp, but Suga just tightened his grip and turned to look at him. “What class?”

Hinata just rolled his eyes and looked to the floor. “English. There’s a mom rep scale?”

“Of course there is.” Suga shot back, turning into the staircase and starting to drag Hinata up. Before they could get very far, though, the bell signaling the end of class rang. Suga sighed. “Whatever, doesn’t matter now, I guess. Wanna walk to practice together?”

“Uh, I was gonna meet up with Kags first. So I could carry his stuff for him. Can you let me go?” He grinned, a bit of sheepishness and nervousness mixing into his expression.

Suga looked down to see he was still holding Hinata’s elbow and immediately let go. “Oops! Sorry.”

“It’s fine. See you at practice, momma.”

“Bye, Hinata.”

He watched for a moment as Suga stepped down the stairs, then turned to give him a little wave before heading off the the gym. Hinata smiled slightly before turning around and running up the flight of stairs, skipping bouts of stairs. He paused at the second floor, then dashed down the hallway, weaving around other students with a few ‘sorry!’s and ‘excuse me!’s. He stopped at Kageyama’s classroom to catch his breath before stepping in.

Yeah, he wasn’t gonna get used to seeing Kageyama wearing that boot. He watched as his boyfriend slowly stood for a moment before walking over, leaning down to grab his things. “Hey, Bakageyama.” He murmured.

“Shut up, dumbass.” He muttered automatically. “Do you know if… what’s Noya gonna…?” He fidgeted, staring down at his desk.

“Don’t worry, I got you. I’ll text him now.” Hinata pulled out his phone, shooting the taller boy a small smile.

 

(hinatit: me and kageyama are coming together  
hinatit: where do you wanna meet?  
hinatit: were not doing this in front of the team  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: yeah  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: i, um  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: is the club room okay?  
ROLLINGTHUNDER: everyone will be changing in the locker room so well be alone  
hinatit: yeah, see you there)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not sure if i should bother finishing this? im not aute if anyone actually cares abt it anymore,, its been 7 months tell me in the comments if u want more i guess lmao


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